Can you give a nutshell version of why you nephew gave you the cut direct except for when he needs money?
Long story short (as short as I can make it
), he moved in with my son in summer of 2011. My husband and I were supporting our son financially as he was still in college. We paid his rent, groceries, car, etc. (my son did work but not full time)
Anyway, it was during that time that K'nnihave and BIL separated so nephew (who had just graduated high school) had a choice to make. He could move out of town with his mother or he could move with his father and into a small home shared with 8 people. He didn't like either option so when the idea of moving in with our son came about, he jumped at the chance. It also helped that we were willing to help him as we were helping our own son regarding rent and groceries. We were willing to help because he told us that he was signing up for classes at the community college that fall.
The only thing we asked of him (the ONE rule!) was that he not consume alcohol at the apartment as my son might be held responsible as he was the older of the two. Looking back, we shouldn't have trusted him.
I found out he was not only drinking at the apartment but he was inviting friends over to drink. I called him and spoke him about it. His response was "I'm sorry you feel that way." He moved out and blocked me on FB. From what I've learned since, he's moved on from drinking and was almost caught with drugs by a law officer. And he's yet signed up for even one class.
I do know that I will be here if he ever needs anyone but I'm not going to be the Bank of Roe any longer. That bank went under with the Summer of NO and I have no intention of reopening it.
Even with all this, a small part of me hopes that one day he will call and say "I'm ready for a different life." Praying for that call one day. I can hope, right?