Finding Time to Eat

[lowspark]

Your coworker is being SS. I would go ahead and eat. I mean, avoid anything that makes her sick, but it sounds like she is using pregnancy to throw her weight around.

POD. And I think that because of this quote:

<snip>
I have been noting what bothers her and not buying it I was told that my eating still bothers her.
 <snip>

As long as you're not eating ultra-smelly stuff, and as long as it's ok with the office rules/culture to eat at your desk, just go ahead and keep eating it.

I agree that IF you can eat on your way to/from your appointment, that would be ideal, but if not I don't think that she can really stop you from eating at all.

I can sympathize with the coworker if your food is really smelly but it doesn't sound like that's the case.

[lady_disdain]

While it is awkward to the OP, she does have a full hour for her lunch. She chooses to use the time for something else (I doubt this is the only therapist in town). The coworker, however, has no choice but to work at her desk during business hours so I do think the onus is on the OP to avoid smelly foods as much as possible.

I would talk to the coworker and figure out what doesn't trigger her nausea. Surely there must be something that is tolerable to both, one day a week.

[snowdragon]

Your coworker is being SS. I would go ahead and eat. I mean, avoid anything that makes her sick, but it sounds like she is using pregnancy to throw her weight around.

I would not even start avoiding stuff she claims makes her sick, she could just start saying everything makes her sick! Really, I am a supersmeller, and supertaster and have several allergies.  Things "making me sick" is a way of life.  I don't expect anyone to work around my issues, including the airborne-I-can't-be-in the-same-room, or- touch- it - after -X -has=allergy    This woman needs deal with her own issues.
  While I agree that it is not this woman's issue that the OP uses her lunch for something else, it's equally not the OP's issue that someone's snack bothers this this lady.  It sounds like the office rules and culture allow for eating at one's desk I would go ahead and do it   with out comment or what ever, simply and matter of factly eat what ever you wish.

[MissBrit]

Thank you for all the replies:

1) As far as eating on my way to my appointment, I drive and the area I drive though is literally lined with wineries. As a result of that, there are a lot of police around. It's unfortunately not the best idea.

2) I have considered the smoothly option as there are some really good places around here. I'm just afraid that a smoothy would smell more than a protein bar or fruit leather.

3) I will just consider observing what bothers her and doesn't bother her and do my best. I am very conscious of not bringing stinky foods to work. Most of my coworkers (including the pregnant one) grab a quick snack at their desks from time to time. This is not an odd occurrence. I actually I used to snack at my desk more but since my coworker's pregnancy nose was announced, I really only eat that one day at my desk. I have been trying really hard to make a point of eating a really filling breakfast and lunch to get me though the day so I don't have to snack.

[NyaChan]

Does she make the same comments to your other coworkers?

[MissBrit]

No, she doesn't. I also know that she and I have never really gotten along that well. I just want to keep the peace and not be crabby from not eating (crabbiness from lack of food runs in my family).

[NyaChan]

Ah then that makes me think that you have already done your part to compromise.  I'd pick a coworker who likes you and bring in enough of a snack for both of you.  Have her eat it or open it up & then you do the same.  If the pregnant coworker doesn't comment on the first person's snack, but does comment on you eating the same thing, call her out on it. 

[SleepyKitty]

If I were you, I'd choose between 5-6 things that I eat regularly for lunch. So, PB&J, maybe a smoothie, cheese and crackers, things like that. Stop by your co-worker's desk and say in a friendly voice,

"Hi Co-Worker! I need to be able to eat at my desk, but I want to be sensitive to smells. Which of these things would bother you?" Now, if she's not totally unreasonable, she'll pick out a few that would bother her, leaving you with a few options for the one day you have to eat at your desk.

If she is totally unreasonable, she'll say that all of those things bother her. At which point you say, again with a smile and friendly tone, "Well, it's not possible for me to avoid eating at my desk on Tuesdays. So since we can't come to a compromise, I can give you a head's up before I eat and maybe you can find a way to avoid the scent. Good luck!"

And then go ahead and eat whatever you want, because by that point it will be clear that there is no way of making her happy and she is being SS.

[SamiHami]

I would eat in the car on my way to or from my appointment. It's easy enough to pick up or pack something portable, and that way you're actually eating during your lunch break instead of taking additional time to do it.

I don't think the OP doing something that would distract her from driving is a reasonable option.

[fountainof]

I don't think the OP doing something that would distract her from driving is a reasonable option.

How hard is to drive and eat a PB sandwich?  The OP does have a lunch she is just using it for something else so I am not overly sympathetic to the coworker issues as this isn't like the OP is being forced to work through lunch.  I think the best option is to discuss the issues with her manager and maybe take a 15 minute break when she returns and works later to make up the time.  I would think this appt needs to be approved anyway because it runs over lunch by 30 minutes already.

[ilrag]

OP, I think it's kind of you to try and eat less smelly foods but if you're allowed to eat at your desk in general (I've never had a job where this wasn't allowed, but it's easy to picture some that are) you should continue to do so.

Do other people in your office eat at their desks?

[RingTailedLemur]

I don't think the OP doing something that would distract her from driving is a reasonable option.

How hard is to drive and eat a PB sandwich?  The OP does have a lunch she is just using it for something else so I am not overly sympathetic to the coworker issues as this isn't like the OP is being forced to work through lunch.  I think the best option is to discuss the issues with her manager and maybe take a 15 minute break when she returns and works later to make up the time.  I would think this appt needs to be approved anyway because it runs over lunch by 30 minutes already.

Driving one-handed and distracted?  Very - and probably illegal to boot.

The OP has a medical appointment, so I'm surprised at your hostility.  OP, I agree with PPs who suggest giving pregnant co-worker a list of foods and asking what is least likely to bother her.  If she says that they all will, then just go for the plainest / least smelly food and she will have to just get on with it.

[athersgeo]

I don't think the OP doing something that would distract her from driving is a reasonable option.

How hard is to drive and eat a PB sandwich?  The OP does have a lunch she is just using it for something else so I am not overly sympathetic to the coworker issues as this isn't like the OP is being forced to work through lunch.  I think the best option is to discuss the issues with her manager and maybe take a 15 minute break when she returns and works later to make up the time.  I would think this appt needs to be approved anyway because it runs over lunch by 30 minutes already.

Driving one-handed and distracted?  Very - and probably illegal to boot.

Exactly. Particularly given that the OP has already stated that her route to/from her appointment takes her through an area where cops are lurking:

1) As far as eating on my way to my appointment, I drive and the area I drive though is literally lined with wineries. As a result of that, there are a lot of police around. It's unfortunately not the best idea.

eating while driving is a complete non-starter.

[cicero]

I don't think the OP doing something that would distract her from driving is a reasonable option.

How hard is to drive and eat a PB sandwich?  The OP does have a lunch she is just using it for something else so I am not overly sympathetic to the coworker issues as this isn't like the OP is being forced to work through lunch.  I think the best option is to discuss the issues with her manager and maybe take a 15 minute break when she returns and works later to make up the time.  I would think this appt needs to be approved anyway because it runs over lunch by 30 minutes already.

but the co worker is having issues with snacks etc. so this doesn't matter if OP is using her lunch hour for lunch or for therapy. The co worker would have the same problem, if OP wants to have a 4 PM snack at her desk.

[GoTwins]

It's only *ONE* day a week. I'd just avoid smelly foods and not worry about it.