acquaintances behaving badly

[PastryGoddess]

or is a "friend without benefits" a *flirty* friend with whom the relationship never really gets sexual?

(not that this changes the advice, though)

Yes or one side is flirting with the other and it's not reciprocated

[kittytongue]

The real problem here is Jaime. She needs to stop passing along comments that Rachel makes. Which in all fairness were probably made with the expectation that Jaime would keep them to herself if Jaime and Rachel are friends. I'd say something to Jaime about keeping private conversations private. Because for all you know she's also passing on to Rachel things that you've said that might be perfectly innocent when said to Jaime but not when passed on secondhand to Rachel. And vice versa.



The rest of your OP kind of throws me.

"I laughed when she left and told him there was nothing wrong with her printer. He did not go by."
"She didn't want the guy but I did."
"OK, I get it she is jealous of me for various reasons."

 I keep rereading this and it still produces the same reaction with me. Why are you jealous of your Fella's female friend? Why did you prevent him from going to help her with her printer? That was so unnecessary. To be honest with you you're really coming off as if you think Rachel is or was 'competition'. I think from reading your OP that you probably aren't as neutral or as above board as you think you are in your dealings with Rachel. That might be why she "glowers" at you and wants to know why you don't like her.

Also why is your being a widow relevant?

[yachtchick]

Again, guilty.  Dealing with Jamie tomorrow.  Will deal with myself tonight.  Why the widow thing .. I guess just to show I am not exactly hot to trot as we used to say.  Bad judgement on my part.  Mea culpa.  Mea maxima cupla.

[TurtleDove]

FWIW, I am a widow of two years so the acquaintance is not unseemly. 

Why the widow thing .. I guess just to show I am not exactly hot to trot as we used to say. 

As a widow, I still don't get it!  What would being a widow have to do with being hot to trot or color "the acquaintance?"

[Moray]

I'm curious how you know that Rachel doesn't actually have a problem with her printer, and why your "Fella" took your statement that "nothing's wrong with her printer" as fact.

[Tabby Uprising]

I'm curious how you know that Rachel doesn't actually have a problem with her printer, and why your "Fella" took your statement that "nothing's wrong with her printer" as fact.

Good point.  I think many people with known computer expertise are often besieged by requests for technical assistance! Was there something else to indicate she was flirting?

[thlayly]

I don't think you need to apologize to us or offer any mea culpas. I am just confused, and would like a few points clarified. (points raised by TurtleDove and Moray, for instance).

[Jones]

Hi yachtchick,
I don't think anyone is attacking you, simply asking clarifying questions to get a feel for the situation. You are new to the board and sometimes it takes a while to get a "feel" for the new user, especially since we don't have certain societal cues here (facial expressions, body language, voice tone). I am getting the sense you feel attacked, please don't, I don't believe (looking over this thread) that anyone means to attack you.

[Moray]

Thank you, Jones. Attacking is certainly not my intention; like thlaly mentioned, we're looking for clarification.

One of the things I like best about this board is that the conversation sometimes meanders along for a while after the initial question has been answered. We don't get to control the direction our threads take, but it always makes for an interesting experience.

OP, I hope you'll come back and clarify so we can better understand the situation and provide appropriate advice.

[kittytongue]

]I guess just to show I am not exactly hot to trot as we used to say...

I'm thinking there's a certain someone who disagrees with you here. 

[yachtchick]

thinking ...
 

[Moray]

Why the embarrassment? This is a discussion forum; we discuss stuff. Sometimes that means additional questions for, or disagreement with the OP. No big deal.

[cass2591]

Tried to remove this but the board won't let me ... moderators feel free, please.  Question asked and answered.

We don't delete threads because a question was asked and answered.

[kittytongue]

thinking ...
 

your Fella

[yachtchick]

Thanks, peeps. Going to grow a better spine with Jamie.  This is so unlike me. I am strong and confident and proud in normal life. Not real sure how I got sucked into this but it is time to get out of it.  You guys are the best.

Pamela