Weirdo issue with my boss

[RebeccainGA]

<bg/> I've worked for the company for four years, all for this same boss. We started out together in Arkansas, and now we've both moved to Atlanta. We have a very cordial relationship, and I'm now working for him on a very small team on some special projects. I genuinely like him, and we all chat and are friendly at work. That said, I am pretty reserved and don't go out with coworkers to lunch often, don't go out after work with them, etc. </bg>

My boss has developed a weird habit when he comes to see me - he steals my candy! I keep one of those 200 packs of tic tacs on my desk, and it's in plain sight, but under the edge of my monitor and clearly not in 'public space'. Every time he comes over to talk to me, which is once or twice a week, he picks up the container, helps himself to a couple, and acts like it's totally normal. He does offer to share snacks (nuts, pretzels, etc) when we're in long meetings, and such, and so it seems to be his norm, but it's just weird for me.

Should I say something? Ignore it? It's honestly the only thing about the man I don't like, and it's SO MINOR, but I just find it bizarre.

[Cat-Fu]

Ooh, that would drive me crazy! Do you think he would take it well if you said something like, "hey, I planning on eating those!" or something? Or could you stash them someplace even less accessible, like a drawer? 

[sweetonsno]

That would drive me totally nuts. I think the best solution is to put them somewhere else, like in a drawer.

[SleepyKitty]

I'm betting it's because of two things: 1) It's a large pack of tic tacs, not a single serving one. In general, bringing in that quantity of stuff to work suggests/implies that it's there for sharing. 2) It's on your desk, not in your desk, even if it's not entirely in "public" space.

In his mind, clearly, on the desk + larger than single quantity of something = sharing. I would start keeping them in a drawer.

[onyonryngs]

I think that it's one of those issues that should've been addressed in year 1.  It will look super odd to go to him in year 4 and say something like, "By the way, those candies I've had on my desk for the last four years are mine."  I would just start putting them in a drawer or a purse if you don't plan to continue sharing.

[jmarvellous]

First, I wouldn't say anything. But second, I'd hide them, for sure. If it's not convenient now, I'd be sure my next pack wa small enough to hide.
 

[MrTango]

Evil tango would be tempted to find something that looks exactly like the candy you have on your desk but is incredibly bitter.  Then, make a game out of not reacting at all to his face when he steals them.

I wonder if they make joke Tic-Tacs... 

[ccnumber4]

So, he's stealing approximately 4 tic tacs a week? 

Put them in your drawer.

[Shoo]

The good relationship you have with your boss isn't worth losing over a couple of tic tacs per week.  If you really don't want him to have any, then I think you should stop buying the jumbo sized packs of them and leaving them out on your desk.  That sort of seems like an invitation to help one's self, IMO.  Get the smaller ones, and keep them in your desk or your purse.

But honestly?  I think you should feel lucky that you've got a boss you like a lot, and be glad all he does is swipe a couple of tic tacs now and then.

[DottyG]

Shoo said exactly what I was going to say.

[doodlemor]

The good relationship you have with your boss isn't worth losing over a couple of tic tacs per week.  If you really don't want him to have any, then I think you should stop buying the jumbo sized packs of them and leaving them out on your desk.  That sort of seems like an invitation to help one's self, IMO.  Get the smaller ones, and keep them in your desk or your purse.

But honestly?  I think you should feel lucky that you've got a boss you like a lot, and be glad all he does is swipe a couple of tic tacs now and then.

Wise advice.

[bloo]

The good relationship you have with your boss isn't worth losing over a couple of tic tacs per week.  If you really don't want him to have any, then I think you should stop buying the jumbo sized packs of them and leaving them out on your desk.  That sort of seems like an invitation to help one's self, IMO.  Get the smaller ones, and keep them in your desk or your purse.

But honestly?  I think you should feel lucky that you've got a boss you like a lot, and be glad all he does is swipe a couple of tic tacs now and then.

Wise advice.

Ditto. You could give him a gift of a bunch of boxes of tictacs and say "here's some to keep on YOUR desk" and see if he picks up the hint but a few tictacs a week is a more than fair price for a boss you work well with and actually like. Things like 'taking my stuff' drive me nuts, too, but I would just make myself get over it by counting my blessings.

[RebeccainGA]

LOL, this is more a question of 'how weird is this' rather than a 'I'm ready to have a showdown over a couple of tictacs'. I don't plan on saying anything to him - although when the pack is gone I'll probably replace with something different and put it in the drawer. I'm mostly just checking my reaction - this is odd behavior, but not egregious.

[jmarvellous]

I do think it's weird as in awkward, if (unfortunately) not weird as in unusual. In my experience, when people keep candy out, it's for sharing. I've just never seen it with Tic-Tacs, and generally things that aren't individually wrapped at least merit a "May I?" before digging in.

I had co-workers in my last job who thought anything edible on a desk was fair game, including the lunch you were in the middle of eating (I swear one woman kept a fork in her pants pocket -- she didn't see getting swatted away as a deterrent). I guess that's why this seems less crazy.

[O'Dell]

Maybe I'm the weirdo, but if this happened with a boss/coworker that I got along with, I'd probably encourage it and make it "our thing". I think little quirks like that can be endearing.

If it bothers you, it bothers you. But I think you'd be better off viewing it as either a sign that he's struggling with a Tic-Tac addiction or, more likely, a sign that he feels your working relationship is close enough that he can drop some of the finer points of etiquette.