General Etiquette > All In A Day's Work

Anti-retirement gift

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BeagleMommy:
I think it is a great idea to check with one of her coworkers to see if they've planned anything for her.  If not, suggest you, your DH and she go out for a lunch/dinner to commemorate her long service to the company.

Coley:
Thanks, everyone. We will check to see if her department has any plans in the works. If they don't, I like the idea of taking her to lunch or dinner.

Mikayla:
My take is a little different.  You and DH should take her out for a nice dinner, and then that is the end of it.

I say this because there's risk involved when you start asking others what they're doing.   I know because I've seen it at least twice.  OP, you and your DH may have common sense and respect for her wishes.  Others may not.  They're well intended, but they just can't let her go quietly. 

I would write or talk to her and just acknowledge that you know she doesn't want a party, but the 2 of you would love it if she'd let you take her out to dinner.  And then, obviously, if you get invited to an offsite event she has sanctioned, you could attend that, as well.

BarensMom:
I'm going against the grain here, but the "retiree" doesn't want a party or get-together.  I think she is probably getting inundated with questions about lunch/dinner invitations, getting together after work, etc.  I wouldn't do anything more than a "We'll Miss You" card with a restaurant gift card.  I agree with a PP that she's probably embarrassed and angry about being forced out, so low-key might be the best option.

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