For some odd reason, my family played this game for awhile, except it was my mom sending messages to me through other people instead of just telling/asking me herself. I invited her for Thanksgiving months ago and never received a response. The day before Thanksgiving my sister called and told me that she (mom) would be coming for Thanksgiving. Um, ok....can't she tell me herself? And just as I was thinking that, my sister said "she also asked me if she could stay at your house for the night but I told her that she would have to ask you herself this time". To which I said THANK YOU, because I do not understand this game. I'm so glad my sister finally decided to stop playing messenger for my mom because it really is irritating and makes no sense to me. By the way, my mother never did call and ask to stay at my house for the night, so she left after dessert. Um, ok then.
You are doing the right thing by refusing to pass messages along. First of all, it's not your job. Secondly, if nephew is ignoring her in order to get some work done, he has every right to that and his mother should be patient and wait for a call back instead of trying to get other people to harass him on her behalf. Just stop doing it, you don't have to be her go-between.