Author Topic: The 'stolen' turkey dinner... UPD #331 p23  (Read 55749 times)

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PurpleyBlue

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #180 on: November 27, 2012, 06:06:54 PM »
In all actuality, the deli probably donated the meal to the church. My feeling is that the Turkey Lady was the middle man and had zero rights to the dinner.

It isn't unusual for Church Members to solicit donations on behalf of the Church. But I can't see a business donating the meal to this woman.

I wouldn't be at all surprised if this were the case.

Yvaine

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #181 on: November 27, 2012, 06:07:41 PM »
In all actuality, the deli probably donated the meal to the church. My feeling is that the Turkey Lady was the middle man and had zero rights to the dinner.

It isn't unusual for Church Members to solicit donations on behalf of the Church. But I can't see a business donating the meal to this woman.

They didn't donate it to the church. They sold it to her, she didn't tell them what it was for, put it in the auction, and then claimed it anyway. The deli was an unwilling, unwitting dupe.

SiotehCat

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #182 on: November 27, 2012, 06:08:39 PM »
In all actuality, the deli probably donated the meal to the church. My feeling is that the Turkey Lady was the middle man and had zero rights to the dinner.

It isn't unusual for Church Members to solicit donations on behalf of the Church. But I can't see a business donating the meal to this woman.

I wouldn't be at all surprised if this were the case.

This topic seems to be confusing enough without adding details. Can we just stick to what we know from the OP?

DottyG

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #183 on: November 27, 2012, 06:23:33 PM »
Regarding the question of why TL doesn't get to put her own expiration date on it, let me submit the following (this may or may not be the case in this particular situation, but it does still illustrate my point).

If the donation had been an actual voucher or something from the deli that had an expiration date on it from the deli itself, would TL be in her rights to put her own expiration on it instead?  No.  She doesn't get to do that.  She, as the middleman in the donation process, doesn't get to impose just any old deadline on it that she wishes.

Had she not picked the dinner up, would the deli have honored Sister's claim to it?  We don't know now.  I'm interested in knowing.  But I suspect that, if this were all done on the level (which I'm increasingly suspecting wasn't the case here) and this were a true auction item that the deli was aware of, they would have honored Sister's claim to the dinner - even the day after Thanksgiving.  That's an assumption on my part.  And not one that may be true.  But that's between Sister and Deli.  Only.

Regardless of any of the other details, though, the plain and simple truth - regardless of any of the suppositions we're making and/or facts we actually know - is that TL has no right to the dinner after it's donated.  At all.  Whether it means that the dinner ended up not being claimed, went to waste or whatever.  Her claim to it was over and she cannot, in any way, shape or form, go get said dinner for herself, a food kitchen, the neighborhood cat or the man on the moon.

sourwolf

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #184 on: November 27, 2012, 06:32:03 PM »
Considering the deli had no knowledge of the deadline I'm sure they would have been happy to give the OP's sister the dinner on Friday.

Sharnita

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #185 on: November 27, 2012, 06:35:23 PM »
Considering the deli had no knowledge of the deadline I'm sure they would have been happy to give the OP's sister the dinner on Friday.

It sounds like they had no knowledge of the whole thing or at least they were confused.  Whether it was because of the deadline, because the dinner had already been picked up, because she was talking about a charity thing that didn't follow normal traditions a combination of some or all of these things - who knows?

CluelessBride

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #186 on: November 27, 2012, 06:41:06 PM »
Had Sis contacted the deli before the expiration date I would have a different opinion - but the bottom line is that she missed the expiration date.

For a pre-cooked meal - it's not like she could go in on Friday and pick up just any sweater.  It was clearly indicated that this was for a meal to be picked up by THURSDAY.

Yes, still a shady way to donate but a deadline was given.  And calling everyday to check on the meal then swooping in at the last minute to snatch it - very shady. The deli owner could have just said sorry you missed the Thursday turkey deadline.  His offering of the other information was none of her business anyway but if he hadn't we wouldn't have this thread to discuss.   

 

Nope. The "Bottom Line" is that the "expiration date" wasn't valid, it was an arbitrary restriction placed by Turkey Lady on a purchase that had already been made from the deli.

While I absolutely agree that Turkey Lady was shady for picking up (stealing) the turkey dinner, I don't think that this part was necessarily wrong. She did not buy/donate a gift certificate. She bought/donated a turkey dinner. And the claim wasn't a voucher. It was a receipt (photocopy). So it doesn't seem out of the realm of possibility that the date range for picking up pre-prepared turkey dinners was set by the store, but not on the receipt. If it's like many printed receipts it might just say something like "1 deluxe turkey dinner $49.99", and then the purchaser pre-ordering the turkey is told they must pick up by Thursday.

Then the expiration date wouldn't be an arbitrary restriction, it would be a necessary part of picking up the pre-paid for turkey dinner.

Again, Turkey Lady was shady - she never should have picked up the abandoned dinner,and calling repeatedly about it was just weird. The church should be informed and Turkey Lady should be talked to. If the church and/or store decide to refund/honor the turkey dinner that would be lovely, but because OP's sis missed the deadline, missing out on the turkey is 100% her fault (unless the deadline was written in invisible ink that wasn't readable until Friday or written in size 1pt font or something similar).

DottyG

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #187 on: November 27, 2012, 06:53:16 PM »
There's a saying that "if it isn't in writing, it didn't happen."  If there were a spoken deadline between Deli and TL that it had to be picked up on Thursday, I would say it's really not a true deadline.  Deadlines are in writing for a reason.

That's why I suspect that Deli would have still honored Sister's request for the meal had this all been on the up-and-up.


Deetee

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #188 on: November 27, 2012, 06:54:30 PM »
If the church and/or store decide to refund/honor the turkey dinner that would be lovely, but because OP's sis missed the deadline, missing out on the turkey is 100% her fault (unless the deadline was written in invisible ink that wasn't readable until Friday or written in size 1pt font or something similar).

I disagree.

If the deli would not have honoured the reciept after Thursday (regardless of Turkeylady's behaviour) then it was the sister's fault that she didn't get her prize.


If the deli would have honoured the reciept after Thursday except for the fact  the Turkey lady picked it up, then it is 100% on turkey lady.

The facts support the latter because the deli didn't say "It's past the deadline". They said "It's already been claimed".

In any case, I really want to find out how this turns out.

Yvaine

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #189 on: November 27, 2012, 07:05:01 PM »
If the church and/or store decide to refund/honor the turkey dinner that would be lovely, but because OP's sis missed the deadline, missing out on the turkey is 100% her fault (unless the deadline was written in invisible ink that wasn't readable until Friday or written in size 1pt font or something similar).

I disagree.

If the deli would not have honoured the reciept after Thursday (regardless of Turkeylady's behaviour) then it was the sister's fault that she didn't get her prize.


If the deli would have honoured the reciept after Thursday except for the fact  the Turkey lady picked it up, then it is 100% on turkey lady.

The facts support the latter because the deli didn't say "It's past the deadline". They said "It's already been claimed".

In any case, I really want to find out how this turns out.

And I think what's really going on here is that there are two different etiquette issues.

One is, can you go back and reclaim your gift that you donated to charity? The other is, can you ask to have an expired (or "expired," if the date is phony as I theorize) gift certificate honored? The two of them being mooshed together is what's resulting in the arguments, I think. I tend to think that no, you can't go snatch back your charity donation, and that while asking if a business will honor an expired coupon might be rude, IMO it's a pretty tiny rudeness in the scheme of things, and not a big deal if the person is willing to accept a no and especially if they're kind of apologetic about it when they ask.

jedikaiti

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #190 on: November 27, 2012, 07:13:08 PM »
Had Sis contacted the deli before the expiration date I would have a different opinion - but the bottom line is that she missed the expiration date.

For a pre-cooked meal - it's not like she could go in on Friday and pick up just any sweater.  It was clearly indicated that this was for a meal to be picked up by THURSDAY.

Yes, still a shady way to donate but a deadline was given.  And calling everyday to check on the meal then swooping in at the last minute to snatch it - very shady. The deli owner could have just said sorry you missed the Thursday turkey deadline.  His offering of the other information was none of her business anyway but if he hadn't we wouldn't have this thread to discuss.   

 

Nope. The "Bottom Line" is that the "expiration date" wasn't valid, it was an arbitrary restriction placed by Turkey Lady on a purchase that had already been made from the deli.

Turkey Lady was the one making the donation. Why doesn't she get to put an expiration date on it?

Regardless of who put the expiration date on it, the OP stated that the woman picked the meal up on Thursday.  Her self-imposed "expiration date" wasn't even up by then.  Technically, the OP's sister had until the deli closed on Thursday to pick it up.  In my mind, the woman stole the dinner either way.  But, even if she was somehow entitled to it after the OP's sister let it expire, she still swooped in before the deadline and took something that wasn't hers.

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katycoo

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #191 on: November 27, 2012, 07:47:21 PM »
Here's what I think happened.

1. Donor lady ordered and paid for a turkey dinner from the deli.  It seems logical to me that  at the time of ordering, the Deli gave a date of when the dinner would be ready, and how long they would hold it for before it would be unfit to sell due to its date past preparation.

2. Donor lady donated the dinner, and wrote the expiry date on the copy receipt.

3. Auction sister bought the dinner, and tried to collect a day after the expiry.  I believe in these cicumstances, neither the church or the deli needs to provide reimbursement or replacement, as the item was provided, the spoiled.

4. Add in the twist that the item was collected by the donor lady on the Thursday afternoon, I don't believe affects Auction sister's rights here as the dinner woudl have been discarded and unavailable to her regardless.  it is, however, incrediately inappropriate for the Donor lady to have claimed it, and i believe it should be reported to the church for their awareness.

If anyone was going to 'not waste the dinner' by donating it or otherwise using the meal, it is the deli.

Wordgeek

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #192 on: November 27, 2012, 07:49:12 PM »
I've removed a few inappropriate / overly hostile / off-topic posts. 

Stay on topic.  Stay courteous.

Venus193

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #193 on: November 27, 2012, 07:50:26 PM »
Katycoo mostly covered the points I was going to list.

The OP's sister should have called the deli on Tuesday or Wednesday to see if she could get a chicken dinner on Saturday instead of the turkey dinner on Thursday.  However, that she didn't did not entitle the "donor" to claim the dinner on Thursday.

I would also be suspicious of something with that short a window to the expiration date.  The written-in date sounds to me to be earlier than the store's actual deadline.  I would have checked that expiry date with the deli.

If the store donated the dinner, they need better procedures for this.  Either way, the TL's actions are despicable.

The OP's sister needs to inform the church about this so they can take the appropriate action, starting with not allowing the turkey thief to have anything to do with running the charitable activities anymore.

boxy

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Re: The 'stolen' turkey dinner...
« Reply #194 on: November 27, 2012, 07:53:48 PM »
Wow.  What an etiquette mess!  Poor OP's family.