Dawn wedding + evening reception... is this unusual? #37, #67 She went =)

[WolfWay]

A friend of mine just told me about an odd sounding wedding that she's been invited to (she doesn't know the people involved too well, she's going along as her boyfriend's "plus one"). The idea of the wedding seemed a little unusual to me, so I was wondering if this is a new trend that starting up or just oddness on the part of the happy couple.

The wedding she's been invited to is a dawn wedding, all guest to be seated by 5.45am (!) on a Sunday morning, having stayed the Saturday night at the remote venue where the wedding is taking place. Thereafter, there will be breakfast until 11am, and then the guests are basically left to their own devices until the reception in the evening at 6pm Sunday evening. Apparently the invite clearly specifies that the guests are on their own for those 7 hours.

These events seem to be taking place in a remote location (from what I can tell), where the guests are stuck there for the entire day away from major city centres or small towns, and it seems a little cruel to me to hold them hostage for the entire day. The guests are also going to be paying for their own accomodation (on Saturday night only, I think) in dormitaries, at a rather steep price per person. Since it's also taking place on a Sunday,  there's very little time to recover after the long drive back on Sunday night before Monday begins.

The whole situation just seems, dare I say it, a little selfish on the part of the bridge and groom? Or are these sorts of time/money commitments from guests reasonable expectations?

[Iris]

I don't think I'd choose to attend that wedding. Unless there is a very good reason for the arrangement it seems like it will be a bit of an ordeal to get through.

I suspect many guests will leave after the breakfast.

[Shopaholic]

This kind of invitation would really annoy me if I were not especially close to the HC.

If I was one of the HC's inner circle, it wouldn't be so bad because I would know some other people there and make plans for the day (mostly sleep!), but as a random guest? I would decline solely for the late reception on Sunday. A Saturday I wouldn't mind as much.

[MrsCrazyPete]

I think aside from family and very close friends if the HC, mist guests will attend the ceremony OR reception, not both. That seems quite presumptuous to me of the HC that guests would want to spend ALL DAY at their wedding, essentially.

I wonder what people with small children will do?

Also, I started getting ready (hair appt, nail appt, etc) at 11am for my 5pm wedding...granted I wasn't rushing myself, but what time will this bride have to wake up to start prepping?

Ugh. I wouldn't attend unless it was someone VERY close to me.

[lady_disdain]

Sorry, they lost me at 5:45am. That is not a reasonable time. A dawn ceremony may be beautiful but most of the guests will be yearning for bed, not romance. This is the sort of thing that is best done with just the happy couple, officiant and immediate family. Throw in the dorm accommodation, huge all day gap (I wonder what activities the venues offers) and remote location and, yes, the HC does seem to not care a lot about the comfort and convenience of their guests. It is one invitation I would most likely turn down.

[joraemi]

That does seem odd.  I'm wondering if there are fabulous adventures available to the guests during those 7 hours and if they are free to the guests of the wedding?

I still dont' know if I'd be going to a wedding at 5:45am.  I hope your friend follows up with you so that you can tell us how it went!!

[hobish]

Sorry, they lost me at 5:45am. That is not a reasonable time. A dawn ceremony may be beautiful but most of the guests will be yearning for bed, not romance. This is the sort of thing that is best done with just the happy couple, officiant and immediate family. Throw in the dorm accommodation, huge all day gap (I wonder what activities the venues offers) and remote location and, yes, the HC does seem to not care a lot about the comfort and convenience of their guests. It is one invitation I would most likely turn down.

They lost me at dorms.  I wouldn't mind staying in a nice hotel all day, that actually sounds kind of nice. I would even struggle up at 0:dark:30 for a loved one ... but dorms? No way.

[Sophia]

If it were a sibling and best friend I'd wake up in the wee hours and drive to arrive at 5am, then leave after the breakfast.  Otherwise I'd decline. 

[Outdoor Girl]

This is definitely unusual and not well thought out.  I *might* be willing to get up at 5:00 for a 5:45 wedding if I was in a hotel room and didn't have to fight for a shower.  But in a dormatory situation?  I'm not getting up way earlier just to get a shower - I don't care how good a friend you are, that's not happening.  And a Sunday evening reception?  So I'd potentially have to use at least part of a vacation day on Monday, as well as potentially stay (and pay) for another night?  Thanks, but I'll pass.

[Luci45]

Very strange. Quite awkward, particularly the dorm.

Actually, it might be fun to take a hike in the afternoon, but then there would be getting cleaned up, a nap, and getting all fancy again.

I can't think of anytime in my life after the age of maybe 8 that I would like to attend.

"Mr. & Mrs. 45 regret that we will be unable to attend this event.

Thank you for inviting us."

[WillyNilly]

The only word I can think of for this is "obnoxious".  I would not go, period.  It could be my best friend in the whole world (well no it couldn't because I could never be friends with let alone best friends with someone who would plan this), but lets say it was my brother or my parent - the answer would be "no".  Its obnoxious.  I would not sleep in dorms, I especially would not pay for the annoyance of sleeping in dorms.  I would not get up at 5:30 am - I certainly would not get up earlier then 5:30 to get dressed and done up! I would not go to a wedding before breakfast.  I would not give up an entire weekend essentially to have nothing to do.  I would not want to be out late in a remote location on a work night.  Just "no" to every single bit of this.

I might endure this type of torture if it would promise to pay off - like if it was a challenge with a million dollar payoff... but honestly even for a million dollars it would have to be a guaranteed payoff, just a chance to win and I'd decide "nope, I'm not rich but I'm not struggling poor either" and skip it.

[Hmmmmm]

I'm a morning person and having a hard time with the 5:45am start.  I'm assuming the wedding attire isn't PJ's and slippers, so I'd have to get up by 4:30 to be presentable, and seated by 5:45.  Good grief the bride must be planning to get up at 4:00am!

If I really wanted a sunrise wedding, I think I'd make that a private ceremony for the couple and maybe immediate family and very close friends.

I think I could even handle the timing of the 7 hours "off" if at a nice resort.
Arrive on Saturday, visit with friends, attend 8:00am ceremony, 9:00am brunch, lay by the pool till 2, take a long nap, and then get ready for dinner/reception.  But I wouldn't want to then have to leave by 8pm to make a long drive back somewhere.

[BarensMom]

I wouldn't care who it was...sister, brother, myself.  If anyone expects me to get up for a wedding at 5:45 a.m., I'm wearing jammies, fuzzy socks, and a bathrobe.  I may buy new, matching ones for the occasion, but that's it. 

[CakeBeret]

I would decline. There's no way in heck I'm shelling out $$$ to stay in a dorm (!) get up at 5am, and then be stuck sitting around in a remote location for six hours while the bride and groom do God-knows-what.

I think a sunrise wedding sounds very romantic. I would attend one if it was for my best friend or close relative, and none of the other strings were attached.

[Winterlight]

I think this is a terrible idea.

If they must do a dawn wedding, then having a very tiny ceremony- if witnesses are willing- and then an afternoon reception for all might be workable. Requiring your guests to be up, dressed and in their seats at 5:45 AM? Not workable.

I get up that early for emergencies and to catch a plane. If I had to get up at 4:45 to take care of dressing/makeup/hair and make it to the site on time- no. Not happening.

And staying in an expensive dorm on a Saturday night is not my idea of fun, either. Neither is possibly having to take vacation time on Monday because the reception doesn't start till late, and I'd probaby have to stay over.