General Etiquette > All In A Day's Work

Keep my head down and stay smiling...? Update #16

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--- Quote from: hobish on December 07, 2012, 01:50:51 AM ---
That's what i am hoping. I know it will not be an issue from a business perspective on my level. The people we will be working with if Gish is hired have worked with us both. I'm just surprised and/or nervous no one has said anything to me, and i want to be prepared if they do.

--- End quote ---

I suspect that no one is asking because they already know that it won't be an issue. Even if you've never stated your policy of separate work and personal lives, that sort of thing comes thru in your attitude. And I agree with Steve's point... *not* saying something is the way to demonstrate it won't be a problem.

If they do say something, say what you said here.

It's either an issue to have a couple in a relationship working in the same company. Or it's not.

The company has to play fair. Either couples can work there, or not. They can't make a special case for just one couple. That would be discrimination. So asking how a couple would handle the situation isn't necessary--because that's not the decision HR has to make. It's just not possible, assuming the OP is in the US, to allow Couple A to work at the company because they will handle their relationship discreetly, and not allow Couple B to work there because they might be less discreet.

So if Gish has told HR that his girlfriend is a current employee, then HR knows everything it needs to know. Either the company allows the relationship, or it does not. They don't need additional info from the OP because they already have all the facts that they need.

:) Thanks for talking me off the cliff. I'm so very buzzing with anticipation and hope and i kind of figured volunteering info wouldn't be smart, it's just hard to sit back and not do anything at all.

I definitely wouldn't say anything.. to me, approaching HR (especially when it's people you know) for any reason would look like you're trying to point out that you know Gish and are trying to influence them to hire him.

I have some personal experience here as my DH and I have worked for the same company. Very similarly, I already worked there when DH interviewed.

Definitely do not seek out anyone to talk about how you working with your SO wouldn't affect work, you're not couple-y, etc. Only if asked about it, volunteer some casual information about how you both separate personal and work life.

There was some concern from higher ups about having us both on staff. But I had a good reputation as being professional and drama-free and DH was an excellent fit so they gave it a shot. It has worked out great.

Our jobs don't intersect much. But if we find ourselves at a meeting together, we sit separately. We treat each other like co-workers. Definitely no kissy face, hugs, pet names, touching, etc.

In fact, unless they're told, most people have no idea we're married. It has led to some really funny conversations when people notice that he and I have photos of the same child in our offices.

Good luck - hope he gets the job!


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