Marta apologised for making me feel that way and promised that she would have plans by Friday. Apparently she's waiting to hear if her mother-in-law "would prefer to have a party catered at home or would prefer to go out". I really think that it is unreasonable to make so many people wait just to satisfy a grandparent, and I think it shows that she is more interested in the scheduling of her family than of my family, but at least I know that I have been promised an answer by Friday. If on Friday I do not hear anything, then I will be disappointed that she has broken her word again and I will feel blameless in taking control of the event.
Oh goodness. It sounds like this family believes in the oldest matriarch of the family has control. If future MIL has been operating under the thumb of her MIL for a few decades, she is going to have a hard time adjusting to you not knuckling under too.
Good for you starting to set the boundaries now.