Happy Christmas?! You've got to be kidding me... [long]

[yokozbornak]

It seems a good time to post the Toxic People Survival Checklist: https://sites.google.com/site/toxicpeoplesurvival/

The last line: "Remember: Stay polite and stay sane and if you can't manage that, then stay away."

Thanks for sharing this!  I just received a Christmas card from a toxic family member that I haven spoken to in almost 4 years, and I needed that to strengthem my spine. I tossed the card in the trash without opening it.

OP, just keep doing what you are doing.  The great news is that you are an adult and your mother has no power to make you do anything you don't want to do.  You mention that your mom is also toxic, and I think it may be a good idea to reduce the amount of contact you have with her, too. 

[afbluebelle]

I suggest doing something groovy with the money you would have spent to make it to your mother's house... And have a VERY Merry Christmas

[Amara]

Bethalize, thanks for that link. It is very useful. [[[[[Hugs]]]]] to the OP.

[Wordgeek]

Insofar as this is an etiquette issue and not a rant, the matter has been sufficiently addressed.

Best wishes to the OP.  Please consider consulting the appropriate professional advice in real life.