Curiouser and curiouser!

[Piratelvr1121]

This isn't really something for the questions thread just cause this doesn't really have an answer, or at least not an immediate one. 

My bff was sharing some old pictures with me last night via email that she had scanned onto her laptop, including pictures of her parents when they were young, like of her mother on her wedding day and when she was in college.   

And her mother as a young woman bears a very striking resemblance to my grandmother, as in they could easily be sisters.  (My friend's 20some years older than me so her mother would have been around the same age as my grandmother) Very similar eyes and smile, as well as face shape.   That and from comparing notes on her mother and my grandmother, personality wise they were a lot alike. 

Yet, as far as we know, friend and I do not have any shared relatives, and didn't even know each other till about 5 or 6 years ago.  So either her mother and my grandmother just have one of those faces that are common, or somewhere back in both of our family trees there's a link! LOL! 

[Sophia]

I have a good friend that I sometimes call "The brother I don't have."  People often ask if we are brother and sister.  He looks so much like my dad's son that it is uncanny.  Even down the shirts they prefer (T-shirts with a pocket).  We even sat down and figured out where my dad and his mom were 9 months before he was born, but they were 1000 miles away. 

[Piratelvr1121]

That is wild!  It does kinda make you wonder where the genetic link is, doesn't it?

[Tea Drinker]

One of my friends looks enough like me that random strangers assume that we're sisters. Note: assume, not ask. It's not "oh, is this your sister?" it's a hotel clerk telling me "your sister just checked out."

It is possible that we're something like third cousins (based on her grandfather having been a Polish refugee, and my great-grandmother having been born there), but we'll never know: she knows the name her grandfather took when he fled Germany and joined the RAF, but obviously that won't be on any family tree records my grandparents made. However, this is part of why her son is my nephew-by-choice.

[BabylonSister]

I had a situation that made me wonder... In 2004, my oldest daughter became friends with a little girl, and I got to know the little girl's mom, "Jennifer". The kid shared a resemblance with my second daughter, which is to say, with a great deal of my ex's relatives. That could have been nothing but a coincidence but for the following:


- Jennifer had been born in Large City In Nearby State and given up for adoption. My ex's family had lived in the same city right around the time she was born;


- Ex's dad was not a faithful husband (he dumped his wife and kids and ran away with another woman.)


So somewhere in the corner of my mind, I couldn't help but wonder if Jennifer was not my ex's half sister.

[Piratelvr1121]

I do kinda wonder as friend's biological grandmother ran off when her mother was 2 and they know very little about her past other than she was adopted, had been married before and left her husband and other children before marrying and having friend's mother so who knows...

[Sophia]

In my case, I know a genetic connection would have to go really really far back.  We did spend lots and lots of time comparing notes.  But both our people were farmers who did not travel.  If there is a genetic link, it would be likely my ancestor going viking in Ireland. 

[rose red]

My grandfather was adopted.  In those days, people have many children so he may have brothers or sisters.  More than once, I'll see some guy on the street who'll look freakishly like my brother and I'll wonder if we are related.

One of my uncle (by marriage) is also adopted and one time at a restaurant, I swear I saw his twin in looks, facial expressions, and mannerisms.  My whole family saw him and were amazed.  Hope the poor guy didn't see us gawking  .

[Sophia]

It is amazing how much is genetic.  I used to have a friend who was adopted at birth, and when 19 or 20 years-old she met her parents.  They weren't still together, but they both lived in the same small town.  There is this photo of my friend standing at a jukebox next to her dad on the day they met.  They are studying the selection.  It is amazing!  They are standing exactly the same way. 

In high school my boyfriend's father had been a philander.  At the family gathering the evening that he died, the main topic of conversation was trying to figure out how many kids he'd had.  Almost all of the legitimate kids had been approached by someone claiming to be a half-sibling.  Then several months later we were watching America's Most Wanted with my dad.  There was someone a little older than BF, with the same last name, and it was truly spooky how much they were alike.  Not just the photos, but they had video so you could see they moved alike.  My dad thought it was both funny and not amusing.

[Piratelvr1121]

My DH's bio dad left him and MIL when DH was 7 months old and had two more sons by a different woman.  Some time after his bio father died, this woman sent MIL a letter for DH which she passed on to him since he was an adult and she felt he had the right to do with the letter whatever he wanted.  As this was when he and I were dating I got to see the letter and the pictures of DH's half brothers.

Those are some very strong, strong genes!  DH looks just like his father and these two boys look just like DH did when he was a preteen and aside from having hazel eyes and freckles, the middle child is a spitting image of DH.

[Danika]

I just finished reading a book called Identical Strangers about identical twins who were given up for adoption and ended up being separated. Neither one knew she had a twin until they were in their 30s. They met each other and the book talks a lot about how many mannerisms and interests seem to be genetic not environmental.

[Nora]

My son looks very much like his dads best friend... We haven't gotten any remarks to our faces, but DH got a couple of worried facebook messages! I hadn't even met BF when I got pregnant with DH, so I'm unsure how we could have been having a torrid affair.

[Piratelvr1121]

A friend of mine has a theory that children tend to look like their fathers when they're first born because it eliminates a need for paternity tests. 

Course if a woman had an affair with her husband's identical twin brother, that wouldn't necessarily raise suspicion. 

Anytime I post a picture of the piratebabe on fbook (which isn't too often, I'm not one of those mothers) I get several comments from my side of the family saying "Wow he looks just like DH'sname!" followed by one comment from my bff saying "I think he looks just like Pirate!" (she has seen pictures of both DH and I as little ones) and one "He looks like a blend of his brothers!"

The last one I agree with.  He looks like my eldest from the nose up with big wide set blue eyes, and like my older one from the nose down, complete with dimples.

[Sophia]

They've done studies and when a certain person is labeled as the babies father, people say "oh, yes, spitting image.  When, really they are total strangers and "father" and baby look nothing alike.

One freaky stat. is that there have been many DNA-test based paternity studies, and regardless of income, class or race, 12% of the time, the man that thinks he is the father is wrong.  It isn't always precisely 12% but centered right around that number.