If I bring a bottle of wine with me to a party as a hostess gift and the hostess opens it and shares it with others, I'm fine with it, and happy about it because I think that means she likes it and wants to share. But if I gave someone a bottle of wine as a gift, without a party, and then I arrived at their house a few days later for a party and they were serving that wine, I would interpret it to mean that they didn't like it enough to consume it themselves. So I'd be slightly offended to see it. If they didn't like it or had too much wine already and wanted to get rid of it, I'd prefer they regift it to someone I didn't know so I didn't know about it.
When I bake stuff for my neighbors, I hope it is for their own consumption and for their family and friends. But I already gave the same cookies/treats to all of our other neighbors so 1) the other neighbors know these were from me and already have some at home so they might not be in the mood to eat more of them at someone else's house and 2) I feel embarrassed like this hostess is saying she has too many and/or doesn't like them and is trying to get others to finish the batch for her. It makes me feel like these are the rejects. Especially since the first time, Becky didn't offer any of A and B (the ones that are expensive and more like delicacies) and offered the C D and E types of treats which are more run-of-the-mill. But that first time, I mostly just took it as a compliment because A and B were painstakingly hard to make and used expensive ingredients, so I was glad to know they were truly appreciated.
You know, I wonder too, if she was thinking you might be offended if she didn't put out some of your cookies. Perhaps she was afraid you would think her opinion of your cookies was so low she was embarrassed to put them out, if she hadn't; she might have felt obligated to share them.
I never considered that at all! Glad you pointed it out.
...I actually think she was just sharing the wealth here with your other neighbors, perhaps not even knowing (for sure at least) than you had also given other neighbors the same cookies.
It's generally the same group of us who give each other things, so she most likely knows who gave what. Plus, only two others and I tend to give edible items - one neighbor always gives fudge and the other always gives graham cracker bars. The rest give candles and house plants.