Hostesses With The Mostest > Entertaining and Hospitality

Family Party. Please bring mac and cheese

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Gumbysqueak:
My mother hosts a big bday party every year for all the children (aka me and her her husband's kids and the grand kids). She makes a fab spread and we all offer to bring something. I brought homemade chicken caesar salad. Mother asked my sister in law to bring mac and cheese since we had a ton of little ones. She showed up with her family at the appointed luncheon time with a green salad and a box of mac and cheese. My mother assumed the mac and cheese would be prepared, either old fashioned homemade or the box kind. She just handed the box to us in the kitchen. Lunch was ready and no time to make the box mac and cheese.

Question: If you are asked to provide mac and cheese. Is the box the answer?

jedikaiti:
No, if you're asked to bring a dish to a potluck, you bring the dish ready to serve unless prior alternate arrangements have been made with the host.

doodlemor:
SIL is out of line.  Of course she should have brought something ready to serve.  I hope that you all just went ahead and ate without the mac and cheese.

If SIL is generally cooperative, maybe she just doesn't like mac and cheese.  Perhaps next year she will bring what she is supposed to if she gets to choose what it is.

I suspect that she is either a bit of a flake or a SS, however.  If this is the case, then your mom should just ask her to bring the least important thing.

cicero:
no, your SIL was wrong. when asked to bring something then you bring a ready-to-serve dish. preferably in a serving dish, and if possible at the correct serving temperature.

reminds of the time my step mother *insisted* on bring chicken for a family dinner because "she wants to help me", i finally gave in (i learned after that), so my father showed up at my house 2 hours before the dinner, with RAW chicken all spiced and in a cooking bag with instructions to roast for 2 hours at whatever temperature. i was so upset - she said that she wants to help me - but that wasn't "help" it just made things more difficult for me (besides she didn't even think to ask if the oven was free, but that was a whole other story).

Paper Roses:
I don't think your SIL was right, but I would call her more clueless than blatantly rude.  She may have thought the mac and cheese would be best if it was served almost as soon as it was made, rather than waiting.  Sure it can just be reheated, but she may have just figured it could be prepared while everyone was settling in and the other dishes were being set up and what not, since it only takes 10 minutes to make.  Of course, if that was the case she should have brought along the milk and butter too, but oh well.

I just think she was more confused than rude. 

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