Edited to add- Link to (poor quality mobile phone) pictures post 14
B/G-Lived with DH 7 years, we’ve had ‘Stinky’ for almost as long as we’ve been together. My in-laws have seen this dog a couple of times. For the first 6 years living together we were in my parents basement apartment, not ideal for entertaining, so they met her once when she was about 8 months old, and again this past summer after moving into our first house and inviting them over for dinner. Both times Stinky has barked at them when they’ve come to the door. Doorbell goes, she barks. I believe this is why they don’t like her. Once guests come in and everything is settled down she’s fine and runs around doing other things. I have figured out in the last few years that if I meet my guests down the driveway and walk in with them while I have her with me she assumes they’ve been with us forever and doesn’t get as excited about them when we come in the house. Unfortunately they showed up earlier than I was expecting them so I didn't have a chance to be out there already waiting.
Also, Stinky does not go where she hasn’t been invited. End B/G
So this July we got Stinky a baby brother. Baby in age alone, currently at 6 months he outweighs her by almost 40 pounds. A week after we brought him home we’re invited over for dinner at his parents where they ask that we bring New Pup over. Okay. FIL wants him to know his scent before he gets big because he thinks otherwise when the dog is full grown he'll be attacked. We’re invited over a couple of weeks later, again asked to bring the puppy because a niece was going to be there and she loves puppies… okay. We only stay for a short while because we were headed elsewhere, but a few minutes before we left a neighbor friend of theirs arrived with their dog (most of their friends have dogs that are specifically invited) who proceeds to bark and growl at our dog because he doesn’t get along with other dogs. MIL scolds neighbor-dog saying ‘none of that! This is puppy’s home too now so you’ll have to be nice and share!’ That really rubbed me the wrong way. They’ve made jokes about having to make sure all the ornaments for the Christmas tree need to be at least three feet up so that he won’t knock them down. I’m not bringing him over for Christmas. I told my hubby I don’t want to be chasing him around with so much going on -100 pounds and the coordination that comes with a 6 month old puppy is a formidable combination alone- but add to the mix a 3 year old niece, toys, foods and chocolate there is too much that could go wrong. Hubby backs me up on that so it’s not issue.
My issue is (if you’ve come this far, congratulations you’ve stuck through my rambling) I don’t want to bring him over anymore, period.
I’m not sure if my reasoning is irrational but they’ve never, ever invited Stinky over. I figured it was because she’s a bigger dog, 65-70lb lab-X where as their friend’s dogs are smaller, I thought it was a size issue. With our new guy though that blows the theory out of the water because he’s already way larger, and will double in size.
The only reference they had ever made to Stinky when we’d come over would be ‘do you still have the dog?’, but with new puppy any communication includes questions about how he’s doing, when will we be bringing him over and if Stinky is treating him well. Every time it’s brought up I have to bite my tongue from defending my Stinky. There has never been any indication or action to suggest that she’s an aggressive dog, she’s never attacked/bitten/growled at anyone or any dog. She’s a squirrel chaser, and she barks when the doorbell rings, but she’s a good dog. She’s never existed to them but oh! new puppy! He’s part of the family now! This. Irritates me to no end.
Am I being irrational? I know if this was a situation involving children it would be absolutely unacceptable, but this is a dog we’re talking about. Are my defensive feelings about my dog justified, or since she obviously will never know these people don’t acknowledge her existence in my family is it just the crazy talking? I haven’t brought these feelings up to my hubby because frankly I don’t know if I’m just being crazy. That’s why I’ve come here first. Do I have a leg to stand on when I say I don’t want to bring pup over, ever?
Thank you oh wise e-hellions in advance.