Next year I might drop the 1 kid per age birthday party

[Deetee]

So I may have read it on this board, but I really liked the idea of 1 child per age of birthday kid idea for a party.

The first two years we just a random party with people and the birthday part was incidental. We didn't even have a cake if I remember correctly.

Then for her third birthday, she could pick three friends and it was all good. We have a small house and in December the parties need to be indoors so I wanted to limit the number of kids.

This year, she picked her 4 friends, but I hadn't thought through what a pain this was. Because I want to have 4 kids attend, she can't just invite 4 kids to party that is 3 days before Christmas. That could end easily up with zero attendees. So instead I have this revolving list of kids and then I email to see if the kids are free and then I need to get some more names and then email those kid's parents and of course this starts to feel more A list/B list the more people I contact.

So far, I contacted 3 of 4 kids from the original list and 1 can attend as the others are out of town. I have another 2 added to the list so I'll contact those next.

Next year, I think I will rent a place and invite everyone and let the invites fall where they may or I might just go with a family party and she can have friend parties in the summer (but not birthday parties)

Any other suggestions for the birthdays for the Christmas babies?

[onyonryngs]

Can't you do the birthday for family on her birthday & then have the friend celebration on a non holiday weekend?  That would solve the A & B list issue, which can cause hurt feelings when a kid finds out that someone else got asked first & they're just back up.

[RobinJ]

Do not do Chuck E Cheese!  I learned that the hard way.  I invited my son's who preschool class as well as his Sunday school class thinking no one would be able to attend with it being the weekend after Christmas.  I WAS WRONG!

At first, hardly anyone was rsvp'ing, so I told 2 of the families who had older daughters same age as and good friends with my daughter to bring the older girls.  Rookie mistake!

27 children and too much money spent later - I vowed to keep it small next time.  I am now in the process of trying to decide what to do this year.  I only have 2 weeks so I may be out of luck!  Time got away from me!  Unless I do it the weekend after New Years....

[yokozbornak]

A friend of mine has a son who has a December birthday, and parties have always been hard because of the holidays.  All of his parties have not had many kids attend, and he has always been really upset about it.  This year, she had a party for him in October.  There were thirty kids there, and he was the happiest little boy I have ever seen.

[Deetee]

Can't you do the birthday for family on her birthday & then have the friend celebration on a non holiday weekend?  That would solve the A & B list issue, which can cause hurt feelings when a kid finds out that someone else got asked first & they're just back up.

Earlier in the month would be better (and I'm totally happy with celebrating on non B-day days. We do a lot of that in our family.)

Sadly,  I am in the middle of exams. So this weekend would have been great, but I am not really available as I am neck deep in studying until next week. This one is especially bad with the party being the Saturday before Christmas on a Tuesday. Actually if it weren't for her party, we might not be here.

[Jelaza]

As a Christmas baby, I see two options:

1) Have an early party (in October/early November) or a late party (late January/early February).  Then have a special party with just immediate family on/near her birthday.

or

2)  Do half-birthday parties in June.

[Hmmmmm]

I agree with having a family party near her birthday and a friends party sometime in January. 

But also by age 5 we stopped the 1 friend per year concept because it was just too hard to restrict invites once she was in school. And she was invited to so many you felt bad if you didn't reciprocate.

[blarg314]

Renting a place could be a bit difficult logistically, unless you find a place that has very lenient regulations for the number of guests.  Otherwise you could be in trouble if too few people come (and you still have to pay for a minimum number of guests) or too many come, and you've got more than can be accommodated by the venue.

As an aside, the list of kids to work though will likely backfire as the kids get older, and figure out the hierarchy of invitations based on the order in which they are invited.  It gets pretty close to an A list/B list situation - the kids you really want there, and the ones you are inviting because the first group can't make it and you need to fill out the numbers.

I like the idea of delaying the birthday party until mid January, and doing a family only celebration on the birthday itself.  It will be nice for your kid, too, as having a birthday that close to Christmas sucks. Or do a half-birthday party, and do it in the summer when you can do an outdoor party.

[kakack]

Having birthdays around major holidays is always a challenge.  My DS was born on Halloween, so in the past, I've held his birthday party in September or even mid-November.  My niece, born on New Years Day, has a half-birthday party in mid-summer instead.  Consider having a friends party in mid-January instead, after all the holiday hoopla is over and done with.

[Deetee]

Renting a place is a bit odd to me as I grew up where you had your party at home all the time and there wasn't even a place available for rent. But it's pretty common with her friends (often a karate place or a gymnastics place) so I was thinking about  it (despite my initial reluctance).

She has other parties so I kinda liked the idea of a small Birthday and larger other parties. For example we do an easter egg hunt the weekend before easter which is great because we have a nice backyard and can entertain 30 or 40 people easily.  But in the winter our house seems so small.

[Giantkillersmom]

I feel your pain, my daughter was born on Dec 21st. We have her "friends" birthday party the first or second weekend of the month and a family dinner on the actual day. As they got into school we initiated the odd/even birthday rule. Odd years are a sleepover with two friends. Even years are a larger party usually at the community pool, skating rink or park.

[blarg314]

She has other parties so I kinda liked the idea of a small Birthday and larger other parties. For example we do an easter egg hunt the weekend before easter which is great because we have a nice backyard and can entertain 30 or 40 people easily.  But in the winter our house seems so small.

That sounds like a great option, too. Keep the birthday celebrations small - with one or two friends, you can plan the event around the guest's schedule restrictions rather than the other way around.  There's no reason birthdays have to be a big party. And then you've got lots of other opportunities to have a big group, and you don't need to worry about reciprocating for invitations as a result.

[Bexx27]

If you decide on the rental option, something you might consider is renting a room in a community center rather than a bouncy place, pottery studio, etc. You will have to plan and set up the food and activities yourself, but won't have to stress about having a certain number of attendees or getting the final number by a certain date.

[camlan]

I feel your pain, my daughter was born on Dec 21st. We have her "friends" birthday party the first or second weekend of the month and a family dinner on the actual day. As they got into school we initiated the odd/even birthday rule. Odd years are a sleepover with two friends. Even years are a larger party usually at the community pool, skating rink or park.

Another alternative, which my parents used, was that we got to choose between having a birthday party with friends, or taking a special day trip someplace. There was always a family party with cake on your actual birthday.

You got to invite one friend to come along on the trip with you, but all your brothers and sisters had to come too. We went places like the zoo and the baseball hall of fame and a ferry ride and museums and a tour of the White House and a tour of a candy factory or even just a picnic to a favorite spot. Not always expensive, but usually a lot of fun.

[PitBullMom]

My birthday is 2 weeks before Christmas--right in the middle of holiday party-ing.

What we did growing up: cake and a special dinner on my actual birthday. Usually with grandma, grandpa, and any aunts, uncles, or cousins who could make it. This was usually at home.

A party with friends any other time of year. We did a May Day party on the first in 4th grade and invited all the girls in my class and went roller skating. I had a sleepover Thanksgiving weekend one year. One summer we did a half birthday and went swimming, etc.

Now that I'm an adult, I do what I want, when I want and if people can make it, great! Last year, I ran the Honolulu Marathon on my birthday and invited a bunch of people to join me at the finish line for cupcakes and beers. This year, DH took me out for a special dinner. For his birthday this year, we went to a dueling piano bar with a couple of friends. Good times!