Is it rude to ask for a recipe?

[CakeBeret]

Or the people who post reviews on the cooking sites that say things like "I didn't have any half-and-half, so I used skim milk, and DH hates onions and garlic and green pepper so I left them out.  This was the worst potato soup I ever had!"

Ah, you have just identified my #1 irritant of recipe reviews. "I left out the chocolate chips (diabetic) and substituted oats for the flour (gluten free) and these just do not taste like chocolate chip cookies. Really disappointed."

[Elfmama]

Or the people who post reviews on the cooking sites that say things like "I didn't have any half-and-half, so I used skim milk, and DH hates onions and garlic and green pepper so I left them out.  This was the worst potato soup I ever had!"

Ah, you have just identified my #1 irritant of recipe reviews. "I left out the chocolate chips (diabetic) and substituted oats for the flour (gluten free) and these just do not taste like chocolate chip cookies. Really disappointed."

But I do appreciate the ones that say things like "The first time I made this I followed it exactly, but I like my cookies spicier than this.  So the second time I doubled the cinnamon and added 1/2 teaspoon of nutmeg, and they were perfect!"

[Hmmmmm]

Or the people who post reviews on the cooking sites that say things like "I didn't have any half-and-half, so I used skim milk, and DH hates onions and garlic and green pepper so I left them out.  This was the worst potato soup I ever had!"

Ah, you have just identified my #1 irritant of recipe reviews. "I left out the chocolate chips (diabetic) and substituted oats for the flour (gluten free) and these just do not taste like chocolate chip cookies. Really disappointed."

But I do appreciate the ones that say things like "The first time I made this I followed it exactly, but I like my cookies spicier than this.  So the second time I doubled the cinnamon and added 1/2 teaspoon of nutmeg, and they were perfect!"

Agreed and I'm even fine with ones that say "I substituted half the flour with wholewheat pastry flour and it turned out fine". 

[Venus193]

Not rude to ask, and not rude to decline if it is done politely or gently.

Some people I will not give a recipe to. Like the niece who used a different tomato sauce and cottage cheese instead of rocotta and left out an egg, then complained that she couldn't make the lasagne taste like mine and blamed me! Happily I give a recipe to my friend who makes it my way first, then tweeks it and shares the tweeks with me - she is an excellent cook.

(We had a great thread about this a couple of years ago, started by Venus, maybe.)

Here it is:

http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php?topic=97669.0

I think this was the best thread I ever initiated.

[bah12]

Or the people who post reviews on the cooking sites that say things like "I didn't have any half-and-half, so I used skim milk, and DH hates onions and garlic and green pepper so I left them out.  This was the worst potato soup I ever had!"

Ah, you have just identified my #1 irritant of recipe reviews. "I left out the chocolate chips (diabetic) and substituted oats for the flour (gluten free) and these just do not taste like chocolate chip cookies. Really disappointed."

But I do appreciate the ones that say things like "The first time I made this I followed it exactly, but I like my cookies spicier than this.  So the second time I doubled the cinnamon and added 1/2 teaspoon of nutmeg, and they were perfect!"

This is the very reason that I always always read the reviews before I follow (or tweak as I always do) a recipe I see online.  You can see something on allrecipes that has 5 stars, but no one single person that rated it that way actually followed the recipe as written, so if I did, I probably wouldn't get a five star rated dish as a result.

I actually get more ideas from reading what tweaks others have made than reading the actually recipe itself (I don't follow recipes, so that's probably why) so I also really appreciate them.

[jeni]

Thanks for the link to the previous thread Venus193, interesting discussions here and with 23 pages on the previous thread I think that's going to keep me reading for a while!

[juanita]

Lol. I just got done reading that whole thing!! Haven't moved off the couch for at least 3 hours!! I am ( modestly said) a very good cook and now I have a new title for myself, selective sharer. ( love that). I have one friend that I share recipes with all the time and I know he will follow the recipe and is a great enough cook that he will sometimes improve it. Which he then shares with me and vice versa. I also have a few that will never see another recipe from me. Ever. No you cannot substitue non dairy coffee creamer for whole milk. No you cannot substitute cream cheese for sour cream in my stroganoff recipe. No you cannot sub raw sugar for brown sugar.  lol.