When you miss the deadline for group gift-giving . . .

[jpcher]

Is it rude to give your own gift or card?

Two people in my office are retiring. We had a big office party for them last week. I donated ($10.00) for the food and made a ppt slide-show that played on a large screen during the party. I also gave the retirees a copy of the CD.

Last week an e-mail was sent out about donating for gift cards to be given to the retirees as a parting gift. For some reason my brain completely blipped on this and I forgot to contribute.

This morning I overheard CWs talking about who should sign the card? Everybody? or just those that contributed? (yes, I was rude, my ears perked up and I eavesdropped for a bit while I was feeling extremely guilty ) One CW suggested that they send an e-mail to all that contributed* saying there was a card to sign, people should stop by today to sign the card and the gifts will be presented tomorrow.

I probably woulda, shoulda, coulda, spoken up at this point and asked if it was too late to contribute (the gift cards were already purchased) but I only had about $7.00 cash on me (went to the bank today ) and didn't want anybody to know/realize that I was eavesdropping. Plus, I was embarrassed that I forgot.


So, now that I belong in all sorts of e-hell for forgetting and eavesdropping, what is the best way (or is there any way) to remedy this situation?

A few options that I thought of:

1 -- getting a card for each of them, putting $20 cash inside and with a heartfelt note. But this seems tacky and SSy to me (as in I'm too special to be part of a group gift, you must notice me because I gave you a personal/individual gift.) What do you think?

2 -- asking coordinator tomorrow (now that I have cash) if it's too late to contribute and would it be possible to include the cash with the gift card?

3 -- quietly forget about it because in the long run, what does it really matter? (I did sign the big poster caricatures we had done for them wishing them well) I've also had private conversations with each of them for a bit telling them how much they will be missed, etc.


*I will not sign the card because I did not contribute (which is the right way to handle this.)



What say you?

[TootsNYC]

any of those would work, it seems to me.

I know that the times I've coordinated such a gift card, I end up with $130, so I round up to $150. And figure I'll either get stuck w/ the extra expenditure, or I'll have room to include someone coming late to the venture.

[Lynn2000]

Yeah, I can see good things in any of those options. For me it would depend on how close I was to the two people--if I might have wanted to get them my own personal gift anyway (good), or if I was just doing it because I felt guilty (bad). If you have enough things to say, the heartfelt note would probably be most appreciated, actually--I mean, the gift card is nice, but they will probably read and be touched by the note long after the $$ is spent and forgotten.

You could also check with the coordinator--as TootsNYC says, it may not be that the cash needs to be added to the gift card envelope directly (bit weird IMO), but it could offset the extra that the coordinator or someone else might have contributed to make it a nicer number. If you trust the coordinator's judgment you could just put the problem to her and ask what her opinion is--hand over extra cash, do nothing, etc..

And on my third hand it sounds like you already did a lot for these two people that they probably noticed. So, unless you're especially close to them OR not contributing to the group gift would make you look bad among your co-workers, I think you could do nothing more and not feel guilty.