Hi all! I have a time-sensitive issue I hope I can get some guidance on.
Some b/g: The Hawk (my partner) and I live in a small Northern community, about 1300km from where our families are. It is a tiny community - there is one road in, and one airline comes here. The options to get to NorthernTown are to drive for 14 hours (the last 4 of which are on a snow-covered gravel road) or to pay upwards of $900/person for a round trip ticket. The Hawk's brother & family also live here, but they have opted to go South for Christmas.
More b/g: I work in the only retail store in town, and The Hawk works for a government agency. We will have Christmas Day and Boxing Day (Dec 26th for non-Canadian members) off, and then The Hawk goes into major overtime for a few days, and I am back at the retail grind.
Due to some family circumstances, The Hawk and I will be "alone" for Christmas. My parents are staying South to see the rest of my family (which is fine, they've been up here for the previous 3 Christmases), and The Hawk's parents are staying South because the grandbabies will be there... at least that was the plan.
Hawkmomma is broken-hearted that she won't see her baby boy for Christmas. It will literally be the first time in 30+ years that they won't be together. She called me the other day, and said she wanted to surprise the Hawk by coming up for a few days. Normally that would be great! Except the only time she can get here is to fly up the evening of the 26th, and then leave on the 29th.
This means that Hawkmomma would see us for a late supper on the 26th... and that's about it. The Hawk's over-time shifts are generally from 6:30am-8pm; he gets home at 8:30, has a snack, and goes to bed. I work 6:30am-4pm, and often later as I am in supervisory role at work and have to cover if people are late. I know The Hawk - he loves his family dearly, but when he is working over-time, he barely has the energy to visit with me, never mind hosting his mom. I told him what his mom was planning, and he asked me to talk her out of it. I am 100% comfortable doing this.. but I'm stuck as to how.
I had told her about the over-time shifts, and she said that she would be "fine with just visiting a little each night". How can I politely tell her that The Hawk is generally EXHAUSTED after 12+ hours of work, and will not have the energy to visit? Hawkmomma is a lovely and kind woman, but has a tendency to be a little clingy - she has come to NorthernTown before as a surprise, and stayed for ONE day - she sees nothing wrong with exhausting herself just to show up for a hug. She is aware that she is a little extreme in this manner, but I don't want to dash her hopes of an amazing Christmas surprise.