Would you say something aboiut a 'wardrobe malfunction'?

[Jocelyn]

You are a guest at someone's home. She is wearing a sweater and slacks. The sweater is not long enough to completely cover her, down to the top of her slacks; as a matter of fact, you can see that she's unbuttoned her slacks because they are too tight. So there is a strip of muffintop showing across her front, of which she is unaware because as she looks down, the sweater looks long enough.
Would you tell her? Assume that you know her well enough to know that she would be embarrassed to discover her sweater had a gap. Assume also that she has apparently put on a few pounds lately. She might have a larger outfit clean and ready to go, or this might be her largest clothes. 
Would you tell her, or not?

[doodlemor]

I'd be tempted to take the coward's way out and say nothing. 

Or, would this be the time for a large, accidental spill, followed by profuse apologies, of course?

[Bijou]

Absolutely not.  You are talking about her weight.  Think about it...exactly how would you say something like that to someone?  "Your muffin top is showing as are your unbuttoned trousers."?
She probably checked herself out in the mirror and is happy with how she looks. 

[Amava]

I would absolutely tell her.

I don't think telling her this would be "talking about her weight".
Blaming it on the clothes malfunctioning, not on the body. And of course as quietly as possible.

 

[MorgnsGrl]

Assuming you were just hanging around the house, no, I wouldn't say a word.

If the two of you were going out somewhere like church or the mall, I might mention it in as casual a manner as possible, JUST in case she didn't realize. But I might not. I have friends who are much more casual about showing more skin than I'm comfortable with -- my style of dress is considered pretty conservative compared to theirs, so I might just figure she was perfectly aware of how she looked and okay with it. I would HATE to cause her to second-guess her self confidence.

[JenJay]

I think I'd kind of tell her in a sly way, if possible. Maybe whisper to her "I think the button fell off your pants, you might want to go check." That allows her to change if she wants while saving face about the "I need to leave the button undone" issue.

And as for that, assuming your shirt is long enough, a friend taught me to take a rubber band and loop it around the button, through the button-hole, and back around the button. This keeps the material of the pants flat and held together while allowing a bit more breathing room. 

[Truluv86]

If it was just the two of us at her house, I wouldn't say anything.

If she had other guests or if we were going to go somewhere together and I didn't know how to broach the subject without sounding critical, I might somehow contrive to get her in front of a mirror. If we were on our way out to a restaurant or bar, I might take her aside and say I wanted to check the back of my outfit and ask her if she had a full-length mirror I could use. Once there, I might say something to get her to stand in front of it too, like "Hey, come tell me what you think...I loved this skirt at the store, but now that I've been wearing it for a bit it's been bothering me. Is it just me or does it look way too tight/really lopsided/etc." Then comment on the lovely color of her own shirt or something while we were still looking in the mirror. That way, she would get a chance to see her whole outfit and make her own judgement about it without me saying anything. 

P.S. Love your rubber band trick JenJay!

[buvezdevin]

Agree with others, if it's just the two you hanging out, I would not tell her she is rather more literally hanging out.  But, if she were planning to go out in public, or if others were joining you, I would offer the thought that she might want a longer top.

[Jocelyn]

This was at a small gathering; there were 2 other people present, and more scheduled to arrive shortly.

[delabela]

If it was a close friend, I would absolutely say something out of hearing of the other people.  If I didn't know her well enough to know if she'd be grateful, I would probably chicken out and say nothing. 

[cicero]

i think i would - if you know that this would bother her if she knew. Since you are at her home, it is fixable. (I hope).

you can focus on the "sweater isn't long enough" aspect and not on the muffintop:

"Jane, I love that shirt! just a head's up - you may not notice but when you bend over/sit/reach there is a gap and it doesn't exactly cover your middle. you might want to change, or put on a tank top underneath. oh, this bean dip is so creamy!"

this way - she has the info and she can do whatever she wants with it.

[mbbored]

i think i would - if you know that this would bother her if she knew. Since you are at her home, it is fixable. (I hope).

you can focus on the "sweater isn't long enough" aspect and not on the muffintop:

"Jane, I love that shirt! just a head's up - you may not notice but when you bend over/sit/reach there is a gap and it doesn't exactly cover your middle. you might want to change, or put on a tank top underneath. oh, this bean dip is so creamy!"

this way - she has the info and she can do whatever she wants with it.

I think this is a great response and hope I can think of something similar if I'm in such a situation.

[mbbored]

I'm going to add, this is why I always have a full length mirror in my house. My mother thinks that having one is vain, but otherwise you can't see how the whole thing comes together. I don't know how many times I've put on clothes then walked by the mirror and realized that this outfit was sooo not flattering.

[Virg]

I think that if you know her well enough to know that it would bother her, then you're close enough to her to mention it without seeming too forward.  So, in this case, I'd definitely point out the gapping.

Virg

[Jocelyn]

I'm going to add, this is why I always have a full length mirror in my house. My mother thinks that having one is vain, but otherwise you can't see how the whole thing comes together. I don't know how many times I've put on clothes then walked by the mirror and realized that this outfit was sooo not flattering.

In this case, I'm pretty sure she looked in her mirror...but she'd just pulled on the sweater when she looked. Then, as she moved, it rode up. I know that I'm constantly doing the two-layer check when I'm out in public (checking where the waistband of my pants is relative to the hem of my top), as I've seen many people who've had this sort of 'wardrobe malfunction'. If you've got a rotund abdomen, it's easy to look down and think your shirt is covering it, when it's not.