Author Topic: S/O Disneyland - was I at fault?  (Read 1859 times)

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Raintree

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S/O Disneyland - was I at fault?
« on: January 05, 2013, 01:01:00 AM »
The Disneyland thread about the child running out in front of the blind woman reminded me of an incident long ago when I was a teenager.

My friends and I used to like to go ice skating Friday nights. One night, after the skating time was over, I went to a bench to take off my skates. I was standing on one skate with the other foot on the bench so I could reach to unlace it. (I guess a more stable position would have been to sit on the bench and lean down to unlace, but for some reason I had chosen to stand with one foot up, and by the way, it was a beat-up old wooden bench that had many years more abuse before I came along).

This woman (I'm guessing grandmother) came along with a small child, and said to the child, "Here, you can sit here" and pushed the child into the space RIGHT next to me, such that she knocked me over and caused me to lose my balance. (Remember, the one foot I was standing on was in a skate, not as stable as with a shoe). So I lost my balance and in regaining it, accidentally stomped down on the woman's foot with my other skate. She howled in agony, and I apologized profusely, asking if she was OK, etc. All she did was cast me dirty looks, and as I was still apologizing, she hobbled away supported by another adult, still looking back at me with a look that could kill.

As I recall, there were plenty of other places where she could have sat the child, and even if there weren't, she could have asked me to move over so the child could sit there, and I would have. As I see it, she shoved me over because she felt that I, 15-year-old girl, had no right to be in the spot she wanted, and she got hurt as a result.

That incident still irritates me. But I'm posting this just to point out that a little etiquette ("would you mind moving over please? My grandson needs to sit down" would have gone a long way, even if it is "only" a lowly teenager you are dealing with.

NyaChan

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Re: S/O Disneyland - was I at fault?
« Reply #1 on: January 05, 2013, 01:06:30 AM »
It was an accident and you had no way of predicting that someone would come and knock you over.  Would it have been better to sit down and do it?  Yes, but I still don't think what happened was your fault.  She should have been careful not to knock into someone who was clearly trying to balance themselves and once it happened, she should have responded to your apology with something other than a dirty look.

Girlie

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Re: S/O Disneyland - was I at fault?
« Reply #2 on: January 05, 2013, 10:01:30 AM »
If she pushed you as you say, it wasn't an accident. An accident is one of those things that can't be reasonably avoided. It sounds as if she did it on purpose.
That makes it 100% her fault, IMHO.

artk2002

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Re: S/O Disneyland - was I at fault?
« Reply #3 on: January 05, 2013, 12:21:37 PM »
Rule #1 when wearing street shoes around an ice rink: Be careful of your feet! Those blades are sharp. Yes, skaters need to be careful, but putting yourself in harms way as this woman did is entirely on her. A simple "excuse me, could we get to the bench?" would have worked, as would have waiting a few moments for OP to remove her skates.

OP, you did nothing wrong. I spend a fair amount of time at the rink (son is a hockey player) and I wouldn't ever get close enough to someone to push them off balance.
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doodlemor

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Re: S/O Disneyland - was I at fault?
« Reply #4 on: January 05, 2013, 01:26:22 PM »
If she pushed you as you say, it wasn't an accident. An accident is one of those things that can't be reasonably avoided. It sounds as if she did it on purpose.
That makes it 100% her fault, IMHO.

I agree that the old bat did this on purpose, and knew that she was in the wrong.  Otherwise I think that she would have made a bigger deal about your stepping on her foot with your skate. 

I expect that she was jealous because you were young and cute and lithe enough to take off your skate from a bizarre position.

loopyluna

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Re: S/O Disneyland - was I at fault?
« Reply #5 on: January 05, 2013, 06:44:36 PM »
Once upon a time (more years ago than I care to think), I did figure skating on a regular basis. Sometimes feet get stomped on. Every time I saw it, it was the fault of the stompee, not the stomper. If you had just been hurrying around not looking where you were going, it would have been your fault. You standing still, albeit in an unstable position? Not your fault. The woman should have seen you here, realized you were unstable, and gone to a different bench/waited for you to finish/ask you to please scoot over a little.

One of the biggest sins at my rink was shoving a skater--it's just asking for injuries, and not just a stomped foot or a sliced shin (that one was pretty disgusting). Since we were all training competitively, there was huge concern over anything that could injure a skater enough to put them out of commission, and shoving could lead to twisted ankles, broken wrists, concussions, all kinds of nasty things (says the girl who had to give up the sport after a concussion).

Right, tangent over. OP, the other woman was in the wrong.

The TARDIS

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Re: S/O Disneyland - was I at fault?
« Reply #6 on: January 05, 2013, 07:31:23 PM »
You were not to blame. Goodness gracious, now people are rude to take off ice skates? No. You acted on instinct to regain your balance and her foot was right where your skate went after SHE knocked you off kilter. It was an accident and she projected her self anguish onto you, just as the mother did to my friend Rose in the Disneyland thread. Shame on her.

Slightly OT: I believe this same principle applies to people who handle animals improperly. Behave in a way that tells the animal's instincts to bite or attack, you'll get bitten or attacked and it's your own fault you were injured. Animals rarely bite or attack for no reason.

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