Author Topic: Rude to ask strangers?  (Read 3971 times)

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LilacRosey

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Rude to ask strangers?
« on: January 05, 2013, 04:12:29 PM »
So I was on vacation for a couple of days last week and I was sitting at a bar and the local guy next to me was talking to me. I asked him what he did for a living and he said that was considered a rude question? I don't understand I thought that was a "safe" quesation to ask people when you meet them but I guess I was wrong? He didnt make a big deal about it and we kept talking and things but I was so embarrassed!, LilacRosey

strawbabies

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #1 on: January 05, 2013, 04:15:09 PM »
It's rude to ask people how much money they make, not what they do for a living.  You were fine.  He was, well, weird.

bloo

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #2 on: January 05, 2013, 04:16:36 PM »
He was weird and rude. I thought it was rude to point out when other people are being rude.

Salvage3

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #3 on: January 05, 2013, 04:18:47 PM »
Must be my age; but this used to be one of the questions that was suggested to use in breaking the ice when meeting someone.  Definitely believe that he was quite rude in his response.

gramma dishes

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #4 on: January 05, 2013, 04:21:36 PM »
Perhaps he was too embarrassed to admit that he was "between jobs"?

m2kbug

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #5 on: January 05, 2013, 04:22:31 PM »
No that's not rude at all.  Asking how much money someone makes is is rude, but what work do you do is just making conversation and taking a genuine interest while getting to know a person.  I guess what hobbies you have or what you like to do on your days off would be rude too.  What in the world would you talk about?

Sharnita

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #6 on: January 05, 2013, 04:23:29 PM »
It can be tricky. An amazing number of jobs/professions get critisism allover the place.,Some people might not want to talk about their job, hear how much it must suck, etc. That doesn't mean you were rude but I think it explains why people might not see it as completely safe.

Yvaine

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #7 on: January 05, 2013, 04:24:24 PM »
Where were you on vacation? In some countries it's considered rude. In the US it's more accepted.

Rhindle

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #8 on: January 05, 2013, 04:35:13 PM »
I'd say even in the U.S., that could be a sore subject. Maybe the guy'd been job hunting for a long time, and that was the reason. If OP's vacation was in the U.S., that is.

LilacRosey

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #9 on: January 05, 2013, 04:35:38 PM »
Oh I was in the United States just a few hours from where I live so not a totally different place or anything I was visiting. I'll be more careful in the future I guess but I deifntiely was surprised as I dont think I've ever had anyone take offense I mean I did talk about the weather and stuff too but I thought that was a pretty standard question when you meet someone., LilacRosey

Fleur

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #10 on: January 05, 2013, 04:37:30 PM »
I'd say even in the U.S., that could be a sore subject. Maybe the guy'd been job hunting for a long time, and that was the reason. If OP's vacation was in the U.S., that is.

Still doesn't make it a rude question, though. I also was unaware that there was anywhere in the world that this was rude.

DottyG

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #11 on: January 05, 2013, 04:43:42 PM »
It's not rude. He's an idiot. And he's even more of one if he's unemployed and "sensitive" about that. Way to cut your networking bridges. The OP could have been in a hiring position or know of someone who is.


bloo

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #12 on: January 05, 2013, 04:50:16 PM »
It's not rude. He's an idiot. And he's even more of one if he's unemployed and "sensitive" about that. Way to cut your networking bridges. The OP could have been in a hiring position or know of someone who is.

Helloooo! Thank you...VERY good point!

Amava

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #13 on: January 05, 2013, 05:05:06 PM »
I tend to ask "What do you do in life?" instead of "what do you do for a living?".

That way, people who would rather not talk about their job, or who are unemployed and don't want to say that, have an "out" to defer to their hobbies, interests, families, etc instead of directly needing to tell me: "my job situation is not something I discuss."

But I don't think it's /rude/ to ask it the way you did. And I agree with Dotty that, networking-wise, it was not too smart of him to respond to you in a snarky way.

Rhindle

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Re: Rude to ask strangers?
« Reply #14 on: January 05, 2013, 05:30:16 PM »
Oh, I never meant to imply that it was a rude question. Lilac Rosey didn't do anything wrong. I'm just saying it could have been a sore point with that guy. He should learn to respond more politely though.

I'd say even in the U.S., that could be a sore subject. Maybe the guy'd been job hunting for a long time, and that was the reason. If OP's vacation was in the U.S., that is.

Still doesn't make it a rude question, though. I also was unaware that there was anywhere in the world that this was rude.