Please stop it

[Dalek]

My sis recently started watching Star Wars movies. She's now a mega fan. Except now, she manages to work SW references into every conversation, email, text, etc.

For example, Sunday we were in Home Depot and someone was getting arrested for shoplifting. She yells out while doing her Jedi motion" That is not the criminal you are looking for!" 

We went out to lunch afterwards and she told the waitress " Our meal is free." She had to explain to the poor confused waitress the joke.

I have explained to her that it really isn't funny. Her BF has told her it's embarrassing. She refuses to believe it's not funny. Her coworkers have stopped going out to lunch with her. She says she's being "clever" and we're just "wet blankets".

I honestly wouldn't mind if it was a reference thrown in here and there. But it's all the time. I feel so bad for her when people are rolling their eyes and laughing at her behind her back. ( I haven't told her in order to spare her feelings).

Any etiquette approved ideas on how to ask her to stop without hurting her feelings?

[Betelnut]

I don't know but I think I would respond with complete silence and bean-dipping.  Don't acknowledge the "jokes" or comments in any way.  Perhaps total non-response will get her to quit.

Maybe telling her that people are laughing will help too.  Nobody likes to be a laughingstock.

[peach2play]

She thinks it's hilarious and in her head it is. I have the same problem.  There is a running joke in my head that I think is absolutely funny, but to other people it can be stupid, offensive or even hurtful (as I found out today and yes I am working on fixing it).  My best friend will just look at me with no expression on his face and say, "Not funny."  I learn and do my best to not make that joke again.  Don't give any emotional feedback.  She wants you to share in the laughter and when you don't, she'll learn.

[rose red]

Since you already told her it's not funny, her friends are avoiding her, and her own boyfriend told her that she's embarrassing, I don't think any more words will get through to her.  I'd just go with a blank expression.

[misha412]

So, her sister, boyfriend, and co-workers find it annoying to the point where some do not want to be seen in public with her (co-workers refusing to go out to lunch). Yet she thinks she is clever and everyone who doesn't agree with her is a "wet blanket."

At this point, there are a few options:

1. Break it to her gently that people are laughing at her behind her back. Not a pleasant realization for her but may dampen the activity.

2. Have a sit-down face-to-face discussion on the topic. This may do no good, but she needs to understand your point of view.

3. Each time she does it, get up and walk away. In a restaurant, ask for your portion of the check, pay and leave. If you are in a store, walk out. If you are at a relative's house, thank your host for the hospitality and leave.

4. If nothing else works, spend far less time with her.

It may take her facing consequences for her to see what is actually funny and what is not.

[Moray]

That's so annoying. I do think you'd be okay telling her (kindly) that she comes off as nonsensical or a little "out of it" and that she makes people uncomfortable sometimes.

A blank look, followed by "You're doing it again." might be a good response for future incidents.

[amylouky]

Can you tell her that 1977 called, and wants its movie reference back?     Just kidding, I suppose that's not e-hell approved. Honestly, I'd just roll my eyes and keep quiet when she does it, she's only making herself look silly.

Nerd confession, I do occasionally try to pull the "jedi mind trick" on DH now and then. But, that's because I know he is a big SW fan and has seen all of the movies at least 10 times. I wouldn't do it to a waitress or a stranger in a store, though.

Bit of a threadjack, but it's a pet peeve of mine when someone "discovers" a band, movie, or other pop culture thing that's been around for years, and can't quit talking about it. I had a cousin who decided a couple years ago that the Beach Boys were the best band ever. He'd tell you, "You have to hear this song!" and it would be like, 'Little Deuce Coupe', or something. I'm thinking, um, yeah, it was great like, 30 years ago..

[bopper]

Can you tell her that 1977 called, and wants its movie reference back?   

that is what evilBopper was going to say!

Bopper says:  "Friend, you and I get that reference, but really no one else does and it is kind of embarrassing when you do it?  How about you keep those to me or boyfriend who will actually get it!"

Reminds me of my FIL who while we were living in Germany would try to kid around with the waiters at the restaurant in English who mostly, you know, spoke German.

[Elisabunny]

Explain to her the concept of "know your audience."  Off-hand SW references among friends, who all like the movie?  Sure, probably at least mildly funny.  Loud comments to the universe or employees who are just trying to do their jobs?  Not so much.

[ShadowLady]

I know I would hate to have to tell her, but if you can, mention that it is sad that she is soooo behind the times, that the joke was funny several years ago, but that people now think it is pathetic to be so late with that joke, so that until/unless a new Star Wars movie comes out, she really should not do that, except at science fiction conventions.

[Outdoor Girl]

Start calling her Jar-Jar since she's being as annoying as that character was?  And I think he was infamous for making comments he thought were hilarious and everyone else just rolled their eyes.

[Morticia]

Wave your hand. "This is not the joke you think it is." 

Perhaps not.  I think the blank look is good.

[Cat-Fu]

Start calling her Jar-Jar since she's being as annoying as that character was?  And I think he was infamous for making comments he thought were hilarious and everyone else just rolled their eyes.

I think this would be the best torture response of all.

That said I do think Star Wars is still pretty relevant, seeing as they're going to be making another movie and the franchise is constantly pumping out products.

[msulinski]

Am I the only one who doesn't get the "Our lunch is free" joke?

[Morticia]

^ from "These are not the droids you're looking for." Jedi mind trick to get free lunch.

ETA, it's not funny.