A Civil World. Off-topic discussions on a variety of topics. > Time For a Coffee Break!

Why are some people just nasty?

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Cami:
I think it's human nature to search for explanations, especially for the behavior of other humans.

I also think that some of us seek the explanation because our natures make us think that if we know the causal factor, we can solve the problem. The sad truth is, however, that we cannot really solve the problem and make other people behave better. All we can do is control ourselves.

Therefore, there are times when you are just giving too much space in your head to people who don't deserve it and it's best to accept the reality of their behavior and move on. Don't waste any time or energy on people who don't deserve it.

AnnaJ:

--- Quote from: cabbagegirl28 on January 11, 2013, 07:39:32 PM ---I like to believe it's an idle hands thing. They obviously do not have enough to worry about, so they find stuff to give themselves ulcers over.

--- End quote ---

I agree - I don't know many people who are busy that have that 'nasty' vibe; they might be abrupt or impatient, but they don't tend to seek out ways to be nasty.  People who have too much time on their hands, however, seem to spend too much of that time finding something to be offended by; a prime example is one of my SILs - I will never go to a restaurant with her again, her attitude toward the waitstaff is that nasty.   :o

oceanus:

--- Quote ---I also think that some of us seek the explanation because our natures make us think that if we know the causal factor, we can solve the problem. The sad truth is, however, that we cannot really solve the problem and make other people behave better. All we can do is control ourselves.
--- End quote ---

Sometimes the nastiness/meanness is so unexpected that it completely throws us off.  But I think we need to be careful to not waste too much time analyzing and trying to make sense of the nonsensical.  It can be exhausting, energy draining, and is a poor use of time.

I disagree with the "idle hands" theory expressed by a couple of posters.  I know of quite a few busy people who are just plain nasty, and quite a few idle people who are nice.

MrsJWine:
I know she started off pretty nasty, but unless she showed herself to be unpleasant to other people or in other ways, maybe she was just having a bad moment on a bad day after dealing with a string of bad substitutes. Of course that doesn't make it okay to mistreat others, but most people have done this at least once.

Amava:
Haha maybe she had missed her morning coffee?

Don't take it personally. Just be glad she worked out ok after a bit! Imagine she had kept up that attitude all day long!

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