Oh mothers, or "I think I can dress myself, Mom"

[Yvaine]

I don't get the whole "season" thing.  Does it depend on your color preference, your skin, hair, and eye color, or something else?  I don't like pastels and prefer jewel tones.

It's based on hair color, eye color, undertones of skin, etc. But I refuse to treat it as gospel because I love jewel tones too. And black. I don't care if they wash me out. Wash me out all you like, clothes, I'm too flushed most of the time anyway! 

[Venus193]

Actually, pastels make me look like I've faded into them.  I refuse to wear any pale colors short of white blouses for work and I own only one beige garment.  My evening wear is mostly black with some items in purple, red, and deep blue.

[magicdomino]

I don't get the whole "season" thing.  Does it depend on your color preference, your skin, hair, and eye color, or something else?  I don't like pastels and prefer jewel tones.

It's based on hair color, eye color, undertones of skin, etc. But I refuse to treat it as gospel because I love jewel tones too. And black. I don't care if they wash me out. Wash me out all you like, clothes, I'm too flushed most of the time anyway! 

The main point is skin undertone and overall coloring.  Yellowish undertones get warm colors; blueish undertones get cool colors.  Light hair colors get pastels; dark hair colors gets dark colors.  So, a fair person with yellow undertones is a Spring, dark hair and eyes with the same undertone is an Autumn. 

Most of the time, the majority of the colors are ones that you already like to some extent.  Chances are, you just happened to be wearing those colors when someone complemented your outfit.  If a color isn't in your spectrum, you may still be able to wear it as trousers or skirt.  For instance, tan does absolutely nothing for me as a top.  However, tan pants go very well with royal blue or purple tops, which are my colors.  Sometimes, you like a color enough that you don't care.  More often it is like the skirt and vest made of a beautiful chocolate brown fabric that somehow never looked quite right on me.   Now, I know to pass the brown by, no matter how silky and molten chocolatey it looks.

Venus, I strongly suspect you are a Winter.   

[Just Lori]

I confess, there are definitely aspects of kids' wardrobes today that bug me:

1. Leggings as pants.  We've discussed this, but there is a definite trend among the under-18 crowd around here to wear leggings with a sweater that does not cover the bum.
2.  Visible bra straps - they're not even unintentionally visible.  They're meant to show. They're part of the outfit.
3.  Teeny tiny shorts.  We weren't even allowed to wear knee-length shorts in high school, so I'm amazed when my high-school coworkers come into work in teeny little shorts.

Fashion is often something that defines each generation, and it also allows young people to differentiate themselves from their parents.  As a rule, I try not to wear the same types of clothes as my teen-aged daughters, because they have their look and I have mine.  Plus, I can't wear anything that allows the general public to see my bra strap.  I simply can't.

[Piratelvr1121]

I remember once being told by my mother that orange-y reds do nothing for me, but bluish reds and reddish browns do.  I think this was after I naively picked up a lipstick that was an orangey red.  It was true, I tried it on and looked ridiculous. 

So these days I wear this instead. http://www.lucyrose.biz/user/products/large/burt-s-bees-peony-lip-shimmer-2.6g-7572-p.jpg
Or this: www.lucyrose.biz/user/products/large/burt-s-bees-peony-lip-shimmer-2.6g-7572-p.jpg

[Emmy]

Pastels really don't seem to do most people any favors.  I'm another person who looks like death in them.

My mom was mostly on me about my hair.  I've had a variety of styles and for a while in my teen years, I wore it long and straight and down most of the time.  Ugh, how I hated hearing "why don't you do something with your hair?  It's just hanging." 

I also had some bad haircuts.  I had a pixie because I was going for a bob and the hairdresser cut the sides really short when my mom specifically told her not to do so.  On top of that, she cut them uneven so by the time it was done it was really short.  I was in 3rd grade and got comments about looking like a boy from other kids.  In 7th grade I had permed hair and needed my bangs trimmed.  I specifically told my dad I want them to fall at my eyebrows and emphasized that I didn't want them too short.  Well, he cuts them really short and they curl up because of the perm so I look ridiculous.  From that point on, I went to professionals for cuts or trimmed my own bangs.

My mom complained I did not dress nice enough for certain activities.  Granted, I wasn't dressed nice, but these activities included a job that often resulted in ruined clothes and outside sweaty activities.  My mom and I have different tastes in clothing now, she is drawn towards neutrals and fairly conservative while I like jewel tones, bright colors, and fun and girly prints.  I have an older cousin who dressed youthful, but not too young in her 40's and my dad would remark and how she should dress closer to her age.  The clothes were nice and suited her in my opinion, but I think my dad might feel that women over 40 have to adopt a matronly style.  I am 36, so I'll be expecting the same remarks in a few years.  I don't try to dress or pass myself off as 20, but I like to dress in fitted fun clothes.

[mmswm]

I have an older cousin who dressed youthful, but not too young in her 40's and my dad would remark and how she should dress closer to her age.  The clothes were nice and suited her in my opinion, but I think my dad might feel that women over 40 have to adopt a matronly style.  I am 36, so I'll be expecting the same remarks in a few years.  I don't try to dress or pass myself off as 20, but I like to dress in fitted fun clothes.

I have a friend who's an absolute genius with taking current fashion and tweaking it "just so", so that it's suitable for women in their 40's and 50's.  You have no idea how jealous I am of that ability.

[Hmmmmm]

I don't get the whole "season" thing.  Does it depend on your color preference, your skin, hair, and eye color, or something else?  I don't like pastels and prefer jewel tones.

It's based on hair color, eye color, undertones of skin, etc. But I refuse to treat it as gospel because I love jewel tones too. And black. I don't care if they wash me out. Wash me out all you like, clothes, I'm too flushed most of the time anyway! 

I think it is a misconception that "Summers" are recommended to wear only pastels.  I'm a light summer and this is a sample pallet that I found on the web.

[TootsNYC]

Heehee...good ol' Dobby. My mother, when she saw my mismatched socks once wrinkled her nose and asked if I didn't have a matching pair.

"Yes, I do have a pair that exactly matches this!"

[Venus193]

I have an older cousin who dressed youthful, but not too young in her 40's and my dad would remark and how she should dress closer to her age.  The clothes were nice and suited her in my opinion, but I think my dad might feel that women over 40 have to adopt a matronly style.  I am 36, so I'll be expecting the same remarks in a few years.  I don't try to dress or pass myself off as 20, but I like to dress in fitted fun clothes.

I have a friend who's an absolute genius with taking current fashion and tweaking it "just so", so that it's suitable for women in their 40's and 50's.  You have no idea how jealous I am of that ability.

Considering how much money 50+ women are capable of spending she should make a fortune at this.

[JeseC]

Oh yeah, here's my other one - my mother's thing with "good quality" clothing.  Now there's nothing wrong with buying a few good, long-lasting pieces.  The trouble is that nothing nice or trendy ever meets her standards, unless it's ridiculously expensive.  Plus she doesn't like second-hand.  Unfortunately this means that, if she had her way, I'd be stuck with a wardrobe full of plain "sturdy" jeans and basic tops.  None of those lovely lace tops I so adore - they're going to rip!  And no that new corset top is right out of the question, did you see how bad the elastic is on it?  Never mind on the last one that I'm perfectly capable of adding straps or replacing elastic.

[Elisabunny]

My mother's thing was that I always had to have short hair.  She thought I looked better, plus it was less work in the morning, etc.  By the time I was in high school, I wanted to grow it out.  But when I'd try, she'd start in with the comments, "Oh, wouldn't you like to get your hair cut?  Wouldn't it be easier to have it short?  Don't you think you'd look better if you got you hair cut?"   So I'd give in, just so she'd stop bugging me.  Once I was married, and especially when I started having kids, I let my hair grow long.

On the opposite side, there's a family in our congregation in which the dad really likes long hair on girls and women.  His wife finally convinced him that her hair was too thin and fine for that look, but their two girls had waist-long hair.  Actually, the younger one still does, but the older girl had an unfortunate incident with a round brush, which required her hair to be cut.  Since she's kept it only shoulder-length since then, I've had some suspicions on how much of an accident it truly was.

[Tea Drinker]

The other thing is that you need to pick clothes that you like the look of. I love jewel tones: bright purple, royal blue, emerald, now and then a bright red. My girlfriend says I look good in pastels, and I believe her, but I mostly just don't like them, so I'm going to stick the colors I've been wearing for a couple of decades. Yes, there are things that wouldn't look good on me, but I don't have to wear all of the ones that would.

[booklover03]

On the opposite side, there's a family in our congregation in which the dad really likes long hair on girls and women.  His wife finally convinced him that her hair was too thin and fine for that look, but their two girls had waist-long hair.  Actually, the younger one still does, but the older girl had an unfortunate incident with a round brush, which required her hair to be cut.  Since she's kept it only shoulder-length since then, I've had some suspicions on how much of an accident it truly was.

Dh is the same way. He loves long hair on women. His mom and sister had long hair while he was growing up, so I think that's where that comes from. I, on the other hand, have fine, curly hair. The longer it gets, the worse it looks. It gets heavy and pulls the curl out of my hair. I finally had to realize that I don't have naturally straight hair, I just don't, and spending money on products wasn't going to change that. I had my sylist cut it to just above the shoulders and it made a world of difference. Dh wasn't too happy at first, but once I explained that my hair type was different that his mom and sister's I think he understood. He loves my curls now and more importantly, so do I.

[Minmom3]

I always dressed a bit preppy. Then I had DD#1 and couldn't wear any of those clothes again.  That hurt.  But still, I progressed, and wore clothing that looked nice.  Not terribly fashionable (not my taste, and frequently not my body, either) but fine.  Verging on frumpy these days because I'm fat and I prefer coverage to cover, and I don't want anybody to count the stitches on my bra, or any freckles seen through a shirt.  The kids would tell me that I needed to dress a little more currently and blah, blah, blah.  I would reply that I dressed to suit myself and the office and my clothes fit and they should be grateful I DO know how to dress.   And DD#3 came home one day and started telling me all about somebody else's mother who was wearing the same stuff her daughter was, and it 'DIDN'T LOOK RIGHT, MOM'.  The Mom wasn't overweight like I am, but she liked and wore the same stuff the teens were wearing, and you know what?  The teens thought it was awful!  DD was extremely grateful I wasn't trying to dress her age...  It was a pretty funny bonding moment for us.