General Etiquette > Family and Children

Why didn't you tell me that when I asked?

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snowdragon:
 In our group we do bbq's in the local park ( Como Lake Park for those in WNY), we picnic once a week in the summer and once a month in the winter, and we have these wonderful menus for them - something happened at one this summer that *still* frosts me.

 We invited Samantha who worked with me at the museum, her husband and their two kids. I asked before hand what the kids eat and was told "they'll eat anything" so my SIL and I did the menu which was:

Stuffed Pork Chops
Grilled Corn on the Cob
grilled or raw veggies
Spinach and Strawberry salad with a maple vinaigrette dressing ( it had raw spinach, strawberries,feta cheese and almonds)
a regular salad for those who did not like spinach.
Rolls
s'mores

when we came up with the menu Samantha was given it and asked if there was anything that anyone in her group could not or would not eat. Again she responded with "Looks good, my kids will eat anything" , so you would not expect that one child refused eat at all and spent the meal making gagging noises through out the meal ( I *know* that part is rude ) and the other refusing anything but the corn on the cob. 
  We were told by the kids and father that we were rude not to have "kid friendly food" and  Samantha was making noises about how we should have "had hot dogs or burgers for the kids". Our kids eat the above happily 3 or 4 times a year.
  We won't be inviting this family for anything anymore - but were we the rude ones for not anticipating that the kids would need a whole other dinner?

Ceallach:
Um no!   You went waaaay above and beyond, not only asking her her in advance about dietary needs/preferences but also running the actual menu by her.    The second step was unnecessary, but very kind of you.  They were unspeakably rude.       There was absolutely no excuse for them to criticise any aspect of your hospitality given they knew the details in advance - not that it would have been ok anyway, but that makes it 10x worse.    Horrid boars, I hope you never have to socialise with them again.

DottyG:
First of all, no.  You were not rude.  In fact, like Ceallach said, you went above and beyond.

But, secondly, YUM!  That menu made my mouth water!

Moray:

--- Quote from: snowdragon on January 15, 2013, 06:29:33 PM --- In our group we do bbq's in the local park ( Como Lake Park for those in WNY), we picnic once a week in the summer and once a month in the winter, and we have these wonderful menus for them - something happened at one this summer that *still* frosts me.

 We invited Samantha who worked with me at the museum, her husband and their two kids. I asked before hand what the kids eat and was told "they'll eat anything" so my SIL and I did the menu which was:

Stuffed Pork Chops
Grilled Corn on the Cob
grilled or raw veggies
Spinach and Strawberry salad with a maple vinaigrette dressing ( it had raw spinach, strawberries,feta cheese and almonds)
a regular salad for those who did not like spinach.
Rolls
s'mores

when we came up with the menu Samantha was given it and asked if there was anything that anyone in her group could not or would not eat. Again she responded with "Looks good, my kids will eat anything" , so you would not expect that one child refused eat at all and spent the meal making gagging noises through out the meal ( I *know* that part is rude ) and the other refusing anything but the corn on the cob. 
  We were told by the kids and father that we were rude not to have "kid friendly food" and  Samantha was making noises about how we should have "had hot dogs or burgers for the kids". Our kids eat the above happily 3 or 4 times a year.
  We won't be inviting this family for anything anymore - but were we the rude ones for not anticipating that the kids would need a whole other dinner?

--- End quote ---

OP, of course you weren't rude!

I was ready to give Samantha & Co. the benefit of the doubt until I read the bolded. Hey, kids' tastes can change on a dime! But for you to go through all the effort to clear the menu (specifically w/kids in mind) with her and then be told you were rude? It stretches the limits of belief.

missmolly:

--- Quote from: Ceallach on January 15, 2013, 06:32:26 PM ---Um no!   You went waaaay above and beyond, not only asking her her in advance about dietary needs/preferences but also running the actual menu by her.    The second step was unnecessary, but very kind of you.  They were unspeakably rude.       There was absolutely no excuse for them to criticise any aspect of your hospitality given they knew the details in advance - not that it would have been ok anyway, but that makes it 10x worse.    Horrid boars, I hope you never have to socialise with them again.

--- End quote ---

POD. Samantha had numerous opportunities to suggest other things, and then didn't. I wonder what her husband and kids would say if they knew that Mummy had already approved the menu and assured the hosts that her kids would happily 'eat anything'.

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