General Etiquette > Techno-quette

About ready to defined...

(1/4) > >>

There is someone who I am Facebook friends with who I haven't really had a lot of contact with in the 30 years or so that I have known her.  I knew her in college and we reconnected on FB.

We were going to connect IRL about 4 years ago when I was out in the city that she had just moved to but...  Well, we shared a phone call in anticipation of that meeting and she had just moved in.  She spent like 15 minutes telling me all about the wire closet shelves that she was having installed that day.  15 minutes!
I tried to move the conversation to a more general, gee, what's been going on the last couple of decades but she was determined.  When it came to making plans on that trip to see her I came up with an excuse that I couldn't get together.  I didn't want to go to lunch and maybe have her go on about something else equally boring.  Don't get me wrong!  I love decorating and closet organizers.  I just don't want to hear the minutae about how you couldn't get ahold of the installer guy so you did and then did that, etc, etc, etc.  Not good conversation.
Anyway, she tends to annoy me on Facebook by asking overly personal questions like "what kind of medication are you on..."  I can't remember what the context for that was, but it was just kind of off--not the stuff you say on an open page.  Conversely, I have a friend who suggested an OTC medication to me but by PM when I posted about not getting enough sleep--which I think is how you are supposed to do that sort of thing.  Not just throw it out there.  I really appreciated the discretion.
So, today I posted something about the horrible music I was being forced to listen to in the mall today.  I'm a rock and blues person and I am preparing to go to about 10-15 shows of my favorite band as they travel around the country, so its kind of a big thing with me.
I posted 'was shopping tonight. Apparently it is "trendy" to blast bad music everywhere.  Yadda yadda...'

and she commented --"you're not the demographic they're after."  Nothing wrong with that.  I commented back "There is no demographic for bad music, just lost souls who don't know any better."

So, she comes back with "You certainly are opinionated aren't you!"

So, I am like aaarrrrrggghhhh!  No! Not at all!  --- Of course I am!  But, what are you?  My mother?  Why would you say something like that on Facebook?

Why would you argue with someone's opinion?
People post things on their walls all the time that I find offensive or think "well, we don't agree on that."  I don't go momming them or trying to shame them for having an opinion.
So, I think I am at the end of my rope with her.  I deleted her comments and mine.  I regularly delete her comments.   The only way I can describe it is that she is a "buzzkill."
I mean, if she would actively or creatively taunt me back, I could accept that because its half joking.  But, this just comes across as "you should not have said that!"  Kind of like an internet monitor.
So, what do you think?  Cut her loose or give her one more chance.

At this point I don't know that I ever plan on seeing her IRL again.  Maybe its time to let go.  I would have thought that since she doesn't seem to approve of much of what I post, she would just defriend me!

Sign Of The Times:
relationships aren't supposed to be that much work. Pull the plug is my advice.

I'm also with you on the insane din of the music at shopping malls. And I may not be their demographic, but my children are (or will one day be) and I will not be underwriting their tastes at such shops.

Ugh, yeah, I'd either defriend her, or if you think you might want to see her IRL sometime, I'd hide my posts from her -- so you can still maintain the Facebook tie if she wants to directly message you, but she won't be tempted to comment on your posts in public.  Honestly though I'd probably go straight to defriending, if I were you.

I love this, by the way:

--- Quote from: Audrey Quest on January 16, 2013, 11:28:18 PM ---"There is no demographic for bad music, just lost souls who don't know any better."

--- End quote ---

From the way you're writing about this woman, it sounds like you don't like her very much anyway. I would defriend.


--- Quote from: Sign Of The Times on January 16, 2013, 11:43:11 PM ---relationships aren't supposed to be that much work. Pull the plug is my advice.

--- End quote ---

Certainly FB ones aren't supposed to be! I agree, if you hardly know her, and she's causing you stress, defriend.


[0] Message Index

[#] Next page

Go to full version