General Etiquette > general

Are wedding presents obligatory?

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I've been invited to a friend's wedding in a few months.  I'd really like to go, but...well, the problem is that I'm having to scrimp and save just to afford to go.  I'm just not sure that I could afford to provide a present.  What is the acceptable action in this situation?

I know you'd like to go, but I am of the opinion that if you have to scrimp and save and still won't have enough money to bring a wedding present too, you can't afford to go.  Send a nice card, and a gift if you want to, but make it easy on yourself (and your finances) and skip the wedding.

You have up to a year to give a gift.

As far as I know the "rules" say you are not obligated to bring a gift to a wedding.

Personally, I would not attend a wedding to which I could not afford to bring a gift.

However -- is there some service you could provide the couple that could serve as a gift? Are you an awesome house painter or babysitter, etc? If so, that could be a great gift.

My thoughts on this matter are conflicting. I think the wedding couple should not feel that their guests are obliged to give them a gift, but I feel that wedding guests are obliged to bring one. I think the gift could be a nice card with a promise that a material gift will be delivered in the near future, though.


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