I agree. I think if you're family, you're pretty much expected/obligated to send a gift. I cannot imagine not sending a gift to a cousin, for instance. But if , say, a woman whose father used to work with my SO , and whom I have met once, sends me an invitationto her wedding, she'll probably get a nice card from me but that's it. The article on emilypost.com did not convey that, for me. It really just said "if you're invited, you must send a gift." I find that very bothersome.