We might invite you

[Bethalize]

On Thursday a friend mentioned Burn's Night, suggested that we could get together at hers. I said that would be lovely. She said she'd discuss it with her husband.

On Saturday she sent me an email response to my "let me know" email and said they were in the process of discussing the 25th and would get back to me.

It's now 6pm on Monday 21st. I have a fair few extra commitments for the 26th and 27th, and also during the week ahead. These include events like choir practice and a sporting meet and tasks such as baking and weight training. I have limited spoons (The Spoon Theory).

How far in advance should I expect an invitation? This person likes to do last minute invitations but Thursday night is simply going to be too late for me. I will have needed to do lots on Tuesday and Wednesday in order to make the space. Should I prompt again?

[Shoo]

I think you go on with your life as if no invitation is forthcoming.  If you do get one at the last minute, just decline if it's not possible for you to attend.

I wouldn't ask about it.  If you have to decline their invitation, maybe it will teach them something about hospitality.  Namely, if you issue last minute invitations, there's a very good chance your guests won't be able to make it.

[peach2play]

The only time I send an email saying we're thinking of such and such date is to ask the invitee if that date works for them.  Write her back and ask if the 25th works.  If it doesn't then ask for a firm date telling her your schedule is filling up and you'd like to see her. 

[something.new.every.day]

I see two choices here: 

1.  You act as if your plans are set.  Get your items crossed off your to do list.  Don't add anything else to your calendar.   Then if no invitation is forthcoming, you have a free night to rest and relax. 

2.  Decide that it's too late, and if an invitation is made, decline and say you are sorry, but it's a bit too last minute for you. 

I think either choice is valid and polite.  I'm not a fan of last minute stuff, but I can go with the flow with tentative plans since I can gear up for whatever it entails.  Then if it doesn't come to fruition I'm just as happy to have the free time.