I am part of a bowling team. I must pay even if I am not there to play. I socialize with my team, and am friendly with the opposing teams. We chat and cheer and high-five all the time. On a normal day I'm pretty peppy. If someone cheers I'll acknowledge the cheers for me or consolations. I'll offer them for others. And we high-five when we do well. And we high-five when we do badly. And there are always congratulations and consolations being exchanged. It is constant chatter. This isn't all teams, some are rather quiet and laid back. But in general our team isn't.
On occasion, when I show up I really don't feel like being happy and peppy and chatty. It doesn't happen often, but it does happen. I was just wondering if I should be staying home when I don't feel like socializing. I have no problems answering necessary questions, but I don't want to participate in the chatter and cheering and dancing. I'm fine sitting and listening, but I just don't feel like talking or high-fiving everyone every thirty seconds.
Is it rude to show up when I'm not feeling like myself? On one hand I am paying for it even if I don't go, so I don't want to skip it. On the other hand I am not sure if I am bringing others down. And if I try to say "I'm fine, I'm just not feeling very sociable tonight" it seems to encourage them to ask a million questions about why I'm upset. Which I'm not. I just would rather not talk. I haven't been able to find a way to say "Look, I don't feel like talking or dancing or cheering tonight. I'm not mad or upset or feeling ill. I'm not feeling out of sorts. I'm not tired. I'm not grumpy. I'm not mad at you. You guys can carry on like normal, but I'm not gonna be my normal chatty, dancing, silly, peppy self. I feel fine, I just don't feel like talking."