Friends and medical conditions. (Epic length) Addl Info p51 & 58

[JenJay]

Thank you for trusting us with your real diagnosis  . I agree that her comment was not appropriate and I would have been hurt, too. Best wishes with your treatment!!

[buvezdevin]

Thank you for sharing your diagnosis, and best wishes for continued good results with treatment!

With your update, and quote of her post, I view her comment as very dismissive, and condescending - as well as offering unsolicited, and unqualified medical advice.

I think you're well shed of her.

[ladyknight1]

I am diagnosed with type II diabetes. This diagnosis led to drastic lifestyle changes for me and medication. Within six months, I had lost 15% of my body weight by adjusting my lifestyle and I have been able to reduce my medications as well.

I work with two women who have been told they are borderline diabetic, and told me all sorts of nonsense (once they found out I had been diagnosed) they believed would keep them from being diagnosed fully. One was eating a tablespoon of raw cinnamon a day before breakfast and drinking some holistic fruit juice that made her situation worse.  One has stopped visiting the doctor and the other was diagnosed and started taking the medications and making changes to her life. My own father made it extremely difficult to make healthy choices at meal times when we were visiting him and I had to insist on proper nutrition.

Every person has their own approach to life changing situations such as these. Yes, I think you are better off without your "friend". I hope you are successful with your treatment.

[Mikayla]

Thank you for sharing your diagnosis, and best wishes for continued good results with treatment!

With your update, and quote of her post, I view her comment as very dismissive, and condescending - as well as offering unsolicited, and unqualified medical advice.

I think you're well shed of her.

This.

In fact, the update made her comment so bizarre I have to wonder if OPs recovery threatens her on some level.  Friend could be comfy with the dynamics of the OPs illness and not want it to change.  So it does represent a potential for sabotage.

I'd steer clear, too. 

[bansidhe]

In fact, the update made her comment so bizarre I have to wonder if OPs recovery threatens her on some level.  Friend could be comfy with the dynamics of the OPs illness and not want it to change.  So it does represent a potential for sabotage.

I'd steer clear, too.

That first paragraph is exactly what first sprang to my mind, also. Sounds like this "friend" wants OP to stay undiagnosed and miserable and is quite unlikely to be supportive of her efforts to get better. 

No one needs friends like that.

[White Lotus]

Golden Phoenix, good for you!  You didn't give up, you found yourself help and are using it!  Applause!
The Non-Friend seems to be not dealing with her own issues and putting them off on you.  You are much better off without her.  This was all about her, and, truly, had little to do with you!  Forget her!
I am very happy that you have found what you need and are moving forward so positively.

[Cat-Fu]

Yikes, the actual wording is *worse* than I originally imagined. TBH GoldenPhoenix, I think you are well-rid of a jerk. I wish you the best of luck with your continued treatment!

[zyrs]

Seeing the actual wording makes it clear your friend was not being supportive.

[Gyburc]

I agree - GoldenPhoenix, I think your friend was really out of line and owes you an apology.

All the very best wishes for successful treatment and I hope it continues to go really well!

[Winterlight]

I posted

"Just got back from the doctors. After a battery of tests i have been diagnosed with [Condition x] Now i can finally get to work on getting better"

Response: ""Do you think the doctor is jumping to conclusions? Seems like there is a posh diagnosis for everything your grannie would have called the norm back in the day..."

That was both unhelpful and rude of her.

[Only me]

so no sure how to respond to this, except,
1)"Yes compulsive overeating ". As a matter of fact there are several different types of eating disorders (6 from what I remember) and compulsive is one, bing is another.
2) Congrats on getting better and loosing.

Sounds like your friend has the same misconception other addicts do (yes its considered an addiction) that anerixia or bulemia are the only two types of eating disorders. I struggled with that for 20 years (since I was about and recovery was not fun. I had people in my life who believed me, I had people who didn't get it but accepted that I was sick, and others who just didn't believe eating problems were addictions. The 3rd included my BF at the time who has struggled with drug and alcohol. He was throughly insulted everytime I would say "yes I know how you feel becuase......"...

Keep going with your recovery. I know it'll work cause it worked for me and today I'm better.

Onlyme

[Drunken Housewife]

What she wrote was extremely cruel, and I can't think of any way she could have a kind intent in writing it.  Yes, you know you are heavy; you're working on improving your health.  I have no idea whether you are lazy or not; laziness does not necessarily go with fatness.  Some obese people are quite energetic and work out a lot; some thin people are very indolent.  Even if you were lazy, that is a rude and harsh way to treat you.  A kinder person who believed (incorrectly or not) that a friend was fat due to laziness would suggest, "I wonder if you'd like to take some long walks with me/join my gym/go to my dance class/any other healthy activity." 

It was brave of you, OP, to share your diagnosis with us, and I wish you much success in working with your doctor on fixing this problem. 

[amylouky]

Yep, seeing the actual wording definitely changes my opinion. I don't think friend was trying to be helpful in the least, and I think your interpretation of her comment as being mean and dismissive is spot on.
I still think your reply was a bit harsh but understandable. I think she owes the first apology.

Good luck with your treatments!