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Author Topic: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?  (Read 5909 times)

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Mel the Redcap

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #60 on: December 01, 2015, 09:28:45 PM »
One thing I haven't seen brought up (but maybe I just missed it) is how much less fun it is to do road trips with kids now. When I was little, all 5 of us piled in the back of the family station wagon and could get just about as comfortable as possible, even with seatbelts on. It's a miracle we are all still alive. But road trips were great because, sibling squabbles aside, we weren't physically miserable for all but the first hour of the trip.

Traveling with small children in car seats now is a special hell I'm glad we're almost out of (they're in boosters still, so it's much better than 5-point harnesses, but still not as comfortable as a nice, cushiony seat). My dad isn't a jerk like the LW seems to be, but he still reminisces about how "easy" they found it to travel around with us kids, forgetting the huge differences between then and now.

As an only child I was able to prop the pillows against one door and put some soft luggage under my knees to turn the backseat into a recliner.  I could read, fortunately, so the car trips were normally pretty pleasant.  I'd consider that position safer than upright with a seat belt since a wreck would have just caused me to roll onto the floor.

Or, if the door had popped open, out of the car.

Or if the car rolled... or if the impact was strong enough to smack you into the back of the front seats... or if it bounced you up and out a window... Seriously, I watch a lot of dashcam crash videos on YouTube (it's a guilty pleasure! ;D I stick to the ones that don't show fatalities or serious injuries) and even low-speed impacts have the potential to do some freaky things.
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Tea Drinker

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #61 on: December 01, 2015, 11:52:34 PM »
I have tried for decades to convince various pharmacists that I am the only human in my house, that if cats were able to open the bottles, they wouldn't take a pill voluntarily; that the youngest ones in my family do not visit in my home, and may I please have easy-open tops?
To no avail.

My pharmacy made me sign paperwork saying that I really do want the easy-open tops--and renew it for a new calendar year--but they gave it to me. Is there another pharmacy you can go to? It sounds to me like the pharmacists aren't actually doing their job, which is to dispense medicine, not to hand over sealed bottles that the patient can't open.
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sammycat

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #62 on: December 01, 2015, 11:58:47 PM »
I have tried for decades to convince various pharmacists that I am the only human in my house, that if cats were able to open the bottles, they wouldn't take a pill voluntarily; that the youngest ones in my family do not visit in my home, and may I please have easy-open tops?
To no avail.

My pharmacy made me sign paperwork saying that I really do want the easy-open tops--and renew it for a new calendar year--but they gave it to me. Is there another pharmacy you can go to? It sounds to me like the pharmacists aren't actually doing their job, which is to dispense medicine, not to hand over sealed bottles that the patient can't open.

Nowadays I have to get one of my (teen) children to undo the child proof caps on medicines.  :-\

daen

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #63 on: December 02, 2015, 09:18:41 AM »
I have tried for decades to convince various pharmacists that I am the only human in my house, that if cats were able to open the bottles, they wouldn't take a pill voluntarily; that the youngest ones in my family do not visit in my home, and may I please have easy-open tops?
To no avail.

My pharmacy made me sign paperwork saying that I really do want the easy-open tops--and renew it for a new calendar year--but they gave it to me. Is there another pharmacy you can go to? It sounds to me like the pharmacists aren't actually doing their job, which is to dispense medicine, not to hand over sealed bottles that the patient can't open.

Our pharmacy has "no safety" coded on our files, which I've only had to request once. (We're basically the same situation as Jocelyn, but there are two humans in the house, not one.)

There's one med my husband has that has to be dispensed in a large container, a size that they only have with a security cap. The pharmacist showed us once how it could be modified (by snapping off a tab), which was lovely. What is even nicer is that since then the pharmacist continues to remove the tab before dispensing those meds to us.

(Maybe I should have posted this to "Businesses that will forever have my patronage." They have wonderful service.)


camlan

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #64 on: December 02, 2015, 09:31:49 AM »
When I was very little, we would travel to my grandparents' house for Christmas. My parents would put the back seats down in the station wagon, and pad the area with lots of blankets and put us there. We'd travel at night, so we'd sleep and not be fussy during the 6-8 hour trip (depending on where we were living). In the 60s, this was normal. Car seats weren't protective devices; they were to hold the baby and maybe let them see out the window.

And does anyone else remember car cribs? A foldable, portable high-sided cot for a baby that went on the back seat? Ours was vinyl, in a red and black plaid. It held the baby on the seat, but since it wasn't strapped in (seat belts were a luxury upgrade back then), offered no protection at all.

I have lovely memories of those Christmases. They stopped, because a) we moved too far away and b) the entire family just grew to be too big--I have over 30 first cousins on that side of the family, plus my own 6 siblings. We'd go to visit for a month every summer instead, taking turns sleeping over at various aunts and uncles houses, and my other grandparents, who had a much smaller house.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


Redneck Gravy

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #65 on: December 02, 2015, 11:56:00 AM »
When I was very little, we would travel to my grandparents' house for Christmas. My parents would put the back seats down in the station wagon, and pad the area with lots of blankets and put us there. We'd travel at night, so we'd sleep and not be fussy during the 6-8 hour trip (depending on where we were living). In the 60s, this was normal. Car seats weren't protective devices; they were to hold the baby and maybe let them see out the window.

And does anyone else remember car cribs? A foldable, portable high-sided cot for a baby that went on the back seat? Ours was vinyl, in a red and black plaid. It held the baby on the seat, but since it wasn't strapped in (seat belts were a luxury upgrade back then), offered no protection at all.

I have lovely memories of those Christmases. They stopped, because a) we moved too far away and b) the entire family just grew to be too big--I have over 30 first cousins on that side of the family, plus my own 6 siblings. We'd go to visit for a month every summer instead, taking turns sleeping over at various aunts and uncles houses, and my other grandparents, who had a much smaller house.

We also had the fold up baby cot in red & black plaid vinyl.   :)   (we are showing our age) 

We also had a 1960 Mercury station wagon to ride around in.  I don't recall it having air conditioning, at least not enough to reach the back end.


POF

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #66 on: December 02, 2015, 02:11:46 PM »
Grrowing up we always stayed home on XMAS and I have great memories of those times. 

When we started our family - the tradition was to go to In-laws at 4:30 or so on XMAS day. 

That worked out great - we were 45 mnutes away - so we still had a good amount of day for the ids to play.  We went to In-Laws - had cocktails, exchanged small gifts, ate dinner, ate dessert and hung out.  We left around 8:00. 

When FIL passed and MIL moved to assisted living - we went to SIL's house twice ( Lakehouse Sally ).  She wanted us there at noon, we didn;t eat until 3:00 ( and there was no other activity besides watching TV )  and would get mad if we left before 7:00. 

it was too long and my kids hated it. 

Following XMAS - after a disatrous repeat with a nephew yelling at me ....... I decided to stay home for XMAS.  I planned big Italian Dinner for 5:30.  I invited everyone in the family to come if they WANTED to.  No pressure - just let me know for the head count.

I've been averaging 15 - 20 people - although some years it's been 28 to 30 !.  One year it was just the 4 of us and MIL.  I honestly don't care how many .... just need to know for cooking and planning.

Everyone likes this set-up because - no pressure, I invite them for 5:00, we eat at 5:30, we do a Yankee Grab after dinner, play a few games. Dessery is set out buffet style and you can help yourself whenever. ( I have a BIL who will eat 1/2 dozen cookies WITH his dinner ! ).

I think Toot's hit the nail on the head - it's fun for them to come to my house. I have plenty of food and drink, games to play and the TV is in the den downstairs - for those who want to watch the game.

SIL is very jealous and tries to nab XMAS back.  I always tell her look - I am staying home and everyone is welcome - but you can certainly do your own thing.  She wants everyone at HER house.


Jocelyn

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #67 on: December 02, 2015, 02:16:01 PM »


Our pharmacy has "no safety" coded on our files, which I've only had to request once. 
I once did that, and oddly enough, the long-term pharmacists ignored it, but I would get non-child-guard bottles if a interim pharmacist was working. You'd think it would be the other way round. ;)
Now, the current pharmacy uses caps that are reversible to make them non-child-guard, but if I get a bottle packed by the manufacturer, of course they're always child-guard. Sigh.

menley

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Re: Ask Amy - Parents ignored at holidays. Your thoughts?
« Reply #68 on: December 02, 2015, 04:13:48 PM »
My parents were careful growing up to make sure we always had our actual Christmas spent at home. Their parents ranted and raved about this (well, mostly my mom's father), but they held firm - Christmas Eve and Christmas Day were for immediate family. I have wonderful memories of waking up in my own bed and running downstairs to see the goodies that "Santa" brought. We would usually spend that full day at home, and then travel the next day or so to visit the grandparents.

Because of this, I think my parents will be understanding when/if we have children of our own and want to do the same. For now, since we're childfree, we visit family for the actual day.

I really dislike the idea that the children "owe" the parents anything - that's the attitude my grandparents had, and it didn't work out well for them. My parents luckily swung in the opposite direction, and are thrilled to have us visit when we have the time and opportunity. If they want to see us more, they don't complain about it.