Poll

Men addressing women as "dude" - thoughts?

Duu-uude! (Fine.)
86 (48.9%)
DUDE. Just -- DUDE. (Not fine.)
19 (10.8%)
Dude? Okay.... dude....(It depends)
67 (38.1%)
I'm a dude
4 (2.3%)

Total Members Voted: 176

Author Topic: Dude, is this rude?  (Read 5005 times)

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Sign Of The Times

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Dude, is this rude?
« on: January 30, 2013, 05:18:50 PM »
A situation seems to come up every year during the Super Bowl. I figure I'll ask here. I'm pretty certain that etiquette forbids men from addressing women who aren't SO's as "honey," "sweetie," so forth. Except maybe in the South where it's OK.

My friend's wife Raquel, I have no intention of addressing as such. However, I would say things like "Dude pass the beer" or "dude, I was sitting there." To Raquel.

I realize that this is some form of laziness. If I want chips from a guy whom I don't immediately recognize, "Dude pass the chips." If it's a woman whose name I don't remember, it's easiest to just say "dude" in some generic, gender-neutral sense. That's the situation I'm asking about.

Is "dude" an acceptable stand-in for a name, from a man to a woman?
The best way out is always through. -- Frost

stargazer

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #1 on: January 30, 2013, 05:20:50 PM »
I think it's fine, but this is coming from someone who exclaimed "DUDE!" to my female manager when I thought of something I wanted to tell her while we were talking.  Thankfully she laughed and just said it must be important.

Sign Of The Times

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #2 on: January 30, 2013, 05:21:37 PM »
I think it's fine, but this is coming from someone who exclaimed "DUDE!" to my female manager when I thought of something I wanted to tell her while we were talking.  Thankfully she laughed and just said it must be important.
Duuuuu-ude!  :)
The best way out is always through. -- Frost

stargazer

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #3 on: January 30, 2013, 05:23:28 PM »
I think it's fine, but this is coming from someone who exclaimed "DUDE!" to my female manager when I thought of something I wanted to tell her while we were talking.  Thankfully she laughed and just said it must be important.
Duuuuu-ude!  :)

Exactly :)

gorplady

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #4 on: January 30, 2013, 05:23:38 PM »
Dude, you are way, way, over- thinking it.

onyonryngs

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #5 on: January 30, 2013, 05:24:02 PM »
Dude, you are way, way, over- thinking it.

Pod.  Every group of friends is different, it may work for some & it won't work for others.  Really, it's just you who can tell if it's acceptable with your group. 

thedudeabides

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #6 on: January 30, 2013, 05:24:30 PM »
I believe my stance on this one should be clear.

Sign Of The Times

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #7 on: January 30, 2013, 05:27:52 PM »
Dude, you are way, way, over- thinking it.
Gorp, I agree but these days it seems like everyone's trying to be offended about something. Just trying to head it off now instead of Sunday.


I believe my stance on this one should be clear.
:)
The best way out is always through. -- Frost

ladiedeathe

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #8 on: January 30, 2013, 05:32:08 PM »
Seriously- this is way way over thinking it.
Dude, take a deep breath (kidding  ;D)
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JenJay

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #9 on: January 30, 2013, 05:32:25 PM »
I believe my stance on this one should be clear.

 ;D

The only time it bugs me to be called "dude" is when my husband does it. For some reason it just sounds wrong. lol

Sign Of The Times

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #10 on: January 30, 2013, 05:39:05 PM »
I believe my stance on this one should be clear.

 ;D

The only time it bugs me to be called "dude" is when my husband does it. For some reason it just sounds wrong. lol
Well yeah, he's the one who gets to call you hon, sweetie, et cetera.
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katycoo

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #11 on: January 30, 2013, 05:46:08 PM »
Circumstantial.  I'd try to avoid it at work unless you know your audience that well.  Socially - you know you're friends.  With my circle its fine.

Judah

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #12 on: January 30, 2013, 05:54:20 PM »
I'm from California: Everyone's a Dude, even my mom.
Ask for what you want. Let's be clear on this one:
Subtle hints don't work.
Strong hints don't work.
Really obvious hints don't work.
Just say it!

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WillyNilly

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #13 on: January 30, 2013, 05:55:03 PM »
Seriously dude?

"Dude" is the generic and more personal/friendly way of saying "hey" (which is another option: "hey can you pass the chips?") to the point where as a female I'm way more insulted you would think men somehow own "dude" then I ever could be by someone addressing me as dude. 

Get over it, the world isn't just a male domain anymore dude, us chicks are here to stay and we will prosper!

Luci45

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Re: Dude, is this rude?
« Reply #14 on: January 30, 2013, 05:55:54 PM »
This is an eye-opener!

I thought 'dude' is always masuline! That's the way my kids and grandchildren always used it, anyway.

I'm not likely to be called that anyway due to my age, but I would never answer because it doesn't register. Thanks for the education. (I didn't vote, either.)