At the grocery with my 2-year old

[shygirl]

I usually try to avoid going to the grocery store with my 2-year old son, but sometimes I just have to do it.  If I do have to go with him, and it's going to be a long trip, he sits in the cart and I feed him french fries one at a time to keep him quiet.

If it's a "just run in and get 1 item" type of trip, I let him walk beside me.  He doesn't run around wildly, but will stay within a few steps of me.  Unfortunately, he hasn't yet learned that he needs to look where he is going, so sometimes he will start walking towards another person or cart.  When that happens, I speak up a bit and tell him to watch where he's going and come back to me.

Sometimes, he'll start heading towards a moving cart, and the person with the cart also doesn't see my son.  Actually, even if the person does see my son, my son is still moving towards the cart, head-first, so then I yell out "Watch out!" to get his attention and make him stop.

I wonder if the person with the cart thinks I'm talking to them and not my son?  A few times I've said to the person with my cart that I was yelling at the kid and not her, so she doesn't think I was yelling at her.

A few times I'm busy telling my son that he needs to watch where he is going (WHEN is this lesson going to sink in?  You'd think after running into walls, doors and people for the past few months, he would have learned by now.), and the person with the cart keeps on moving, so I don't manage to tell her anything.

What would you think if you heard someone yell "Watch out!", kind of in your direction?  Am I rude?

[LeveeWoman]

I think the rude part is letting the kid get in the way of people with carts. What if he doesn't stop and the other person doesn't see him? I know I'd be devestated if I hit a little kid, and I'd be quite angry at the parent who put him in harm's way.

[lowspark]

Yeah I agree. If he has not yet mastered the art of staying out of the way of carts & people, you need to control him. So either hold his hand, or go ahead and seat him in a cart even if it's just one or two items to be picked up.

To answer your specific question, whether I think you're calling out to me to watch out or to your son would probably depend on where you were looking and your tone of voice.

[Perfect Circle]

You need to at least hold his hand until you are confident he isn't going to walk into people or carts.

[Honeypickle]

Why don't you try saying "Son's Name, be careful" or "Son's Name, watch out" rather than just "Watch out"? Otherwise you do run the risk of other adults thinking you are talking to them.

[mmswm]

I know this is a "controversial" thing, but have you considered toddler leashes?    My kids loved them.  They gave the kids a little bit of freedom, while still allowing me some control over where they were going.  I found that my kids were generally much happier when I used them over a stroller or holding my hand.

As to your question, I agree with <son's name>, watch out! instead of just "watch out".

[Jones]

Use your son's name, and apologize to other.shoppers when he inconveniences them. As a side note, have you had his vision checked? It sounds like he's running into a lot of objects.

[shygirl]

Yeah I agree. If he has not yet mastered the art of staying out of the way of carts & people, you need to control him. So either hold his hand, or go ahead and seat him in a cart even if it's just one or two items to be picked up.

To answer your specific question, whether I think you're calling out to me to watch out or to your son would probably depend on where you were looking and your tone of voice.

Unfortunately, he starts screaming when I hold his hand at the grocery store.  He also screams if I leash him.  The only way I can get him to sit in the cart is to bribe him with french fries, and I really don't want to do that for what amounts to a 5 minute shopping trip.

Why don't you try saying "Son's Name, be careful" or "Son's Name, watch out" rather than just "Watch out"? Otherwise you do run the risk of other adults thinking you are talking to them.

I do say his name, but sometimes I forget.   If it's really crowded at the grocery store, I will carry him, but then it's a little difficult to carry some groceries too.

[mmswm]

I agree with the advise to get his vision checked if you haven't already done so. 

I know this isn't a parenting forum, but have you tried going on "practice runs" with him during times of day when the store isn't so crowded?  Drive to the store.  When you get out of the car, but before you get inside, explain to him that you're practicing good store behavior, and what your expectations are (stay by mommy, hold on to the cart, etc.)  Then spend a few minutes (maybe 5) walking up and down 2 or 3 aisles.  Park the cart and leave when you're done. Don't actually buy anything during these practice trips.  If he does a good job you can celebrate with a cookie or a trip to the park or whatever. That will help when you're really in a hurry or when you have to look away from him to select your items.

[delabela]

Ah, 2 year olds and public.  One of my children really hates holding hands, but he's at an age where he just has to if we are in an environment like a grocery store.  I would say you should probably work on that piece.  I wouldn't be upset if you yelled "watch out" in my direction in a store, as it would probably be pretty obvious what was happening. 

[jaxsue]

I think the rude part is letting the kid get in the way of people with carts. What if he doesn't stop and the other person doesn't see him? I know I'd be devestated if I hit a little kid, and I'd be quite angry at the parent who put him in harm's way.

ITA.

As a vendor (before ankle break, anyway) I spent 30 hrs in several Walmarts a week. Of course I was careful around other shoppers, especially young children. They are unpredictable, they can dart without warning. I can't count how many times I've had to do a quick manuever to avoid having a collision with a child.

OP, I raised 2 boys and took them shopping with me on a regular basis. I found it was easiest, at such a young age, to put them in a grocery cart, even for a small shopping trip.

[Hmmmmm]

I think a general yelling of watch out is ineffective and should be only used is trying to warn someone who's name you don't know.  Much better to call your sons name.  But I really think since this has occurred so often for you that you are posting about it, you probably need to be holding his hand, carrying him, or putting him in a cart. The grocery store can be as dangerous as the parking lot for a toddler and Im sure you wouldn't allow him to walk there uncontrolled.

[bah12]

"Watch out" is a reaction and I think that if someone thinks you are being rude for saying it to a 2 year old, there is something wrong (even if their first reaction was you said to them).

Your son is 2.  He's not going to automatically know to watch where he's going at all times.  And he's not going to learn unless you are allowed to let him walk and "practice" sometimes.  I personally see nothing wrong with letting him walk if it's a quick trip and the store is not overly crowded or busy. 

Sure, it would be great if your immediate reaction would be to say something like "son's name, please watch where you're going", but that is rarely the case.  If your son and the person driving the other cart don't see each other, "watch out" is the most effective way of getting everyone's attention.  It's a safety thing.  I'd yell it out if I saw two adults about to collide in the grocery store (and that has happened).

[ktelderkin]

My DS is 4 and he still occasionally walks into things.  It's not his vision (it's been tested multiple times) but more that he tends to be in his own world a bit.  I wish I could say he'll outgrow it really soon, but it might be a bit.      My 2 year DD is much better about it, so he may grow out of it really soon. 

If he doesn't want to hold your hand (which I get, it seems like lots of little kids go through that) you might just try staying closer to him - there have been times with DS where I feel a bit like I'm herding him through the store like he's a sheep.  Other people seem more likely to notice me than him.  I apologize if he does manage to bump into someone and people have always been really nice about it. 

I do agree with other posters that the cart might be easiest.  Would something like a favorite book or toy that you could keep in a purse work?  It could be something that he only gets at the store which might make it more appealing.  Or even stickers - both my kiddos will play with a sticker for awhile. Might be long enough to get you in & out. 

[onyonryngs]

Ah, 2 year olds and public.  One of my children really hates holding hands, but he's at an age where he just has to if we are in an environment like a grocery store.  I would say you should probably work on that piece.  I wouldn't be upset if you yelled "watch out" in my direction in a store, as it would probably be pretty obvious what was happening.

This.  I went through that with mine.  Kids scream to get their way, you just have to push through.  Keep training him and yourself.  Train him to hold your hand, train yourself to remember to say his name when you yell "watch out."