Author Topic: Being polite when saying no to grandchild vacation  (Read 10403 times)

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squeakers

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Re: Being polite when saying no to grandchild vacation
« Reply #60 on: February 06, 2013, 04:23:15 PM »
I think that you have a lot of relationship issues when dealing with your inlaws.  I'm not sure any of them have to deal with etiquette as they just seem to be questions on how to interact normally with family members.  I think it would be a great help to find someone you can talk with to help you find a way to better interact with those around you.  It really does not sound like your inlaws are bad people.

Your post is puzzling to me.

I don't think the OP has any more issues with dealing with her in-laws than many of us have (or have had) from time to time.

Yes, they ARE about etiquette, because we like to handle these personal issues as tactfully as possible to make things better and or avoid making them worse.

She HAS found "someone" she can talk with to help her by either suggesting new strategies or by supporting those she's already implementing. 

That "someone" is us!

Continued issues relating to family members crosses out of etiquette boundaries.

Says who?

The mods, when they lock threads that have more to do with relationships than etiquette.
"I feel sarcasm is the lowest form of wit." "It is so low, in fact, that Miss Manners feels sure you would not want to resort to it yourself, even in your own defense. We do not believe in retaliatory rudeness." Judith Martin

LeveeWoman

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Re: Being polite when saying no to grandchild vacation
« Reply #61 on: February 06, 2013, 04:55:46 PM »
I think that you have a lot of relationship issues when dealing with your inlaws.  I'm not sure any of them have to deal with etiquette as they just seem to be questions on how to interact normally with family members.  I think it would be a great help to find someone you can talk with to help you find a way to better interact with those around you.  It really does not sound like your inlaws are bad people.

Your post is puzzling to me.

I don't think the OP has any more issues with dealing with her in-laws than many of us have (or have had) from time to time.

Yes, they ARE about etiquette, because we like to handle these personal issues as tactfully as possible to make things better and or avoid making them worse.

She HAS found "someone" she can talk with to help her by either suggesting new strategies or by supporting those she's already implementing. 

That "someone" is us!

Continued issues relating to family members crosses out of etiquette boundaries.

Says who?

The mods, when they lock threads that have more to do with relationships than etiquette.

The poster whom I addressed is not a moderator. Besides, this thread is all about etiquette.

onyonryngs

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Re: Being polite when saying no to grandchild vacation
« Reply #62 on: February 06, 2013, 05:21:54 PM »
I think that you have a lot of relationship issues when dealing with your inlaws.  I'm not sure any of them have to deal with etiquette as they just seem to be questions on how to interact normally with family members.  I think it would be a great help to find someone you can talk with to help you find a way to better interact with those around you.  It really does not sound like your inlaws are bad people.

Your post is puzzling to me.

I don't think the OP has any more issues with dealing with her in-laws than many of us have (or have had) from time to time.

Yes, they ARE about etiquette, because we like to handle these personal issues as tactfully as possible to make things better and or avoid making them worse.

She HAS found "someone" she can talk with to help her by either suggesting new strategies or by supporting those she's already implementing. 

That "someone" is us!

Continued issues relating to family members crosses out of etiquette boundaries.

Says who?

The mods, when they lock threads that have more to do with relationships than etiquette.

The poster whom I addressed is not a moderator. Besides, this thread is all about etiquette.

No, I'm not a mod, but this topic seems like a relationship issue similar to a few of those have gotten locked/moved lately because they really were more about dealing with an inlaw rather than etiquette. 

Venus193

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Re: Being polite when saying no to grandchild vacation
« Reply #63 on: February 06, 2013, 05:24:21 PM »
OP here...sorry about the delay in the responses to questions

Hubby's opinion: He doesn't care he leaves those decisions up to me

School: She starts kindergarten the last week of July. They are going up in August. Either way it for me is to long of a time and to far away. It is 3 hours up north in a Cabin not close to anything and she has asthma.

Other Grandchildren: There are 3 other children all older teens so she will be the youngest there (5 at that time)

Grandparent's health/stamina: They both have medical issues and gma gets tired easily. Gpa more stamina but I think that watching 4 kids for 7 days would be to much

I haven't heard anything for a little bit. Hopefully they will let it go and enjoy time with their older grandchildren. She won't be going. I don't want to take her out that long plus this school tends to be very academically focused so she could easily fall behind (Yes even in kindergarten)

Our daughter hasn't been away from us for more then 48 hours. I don't know how she would do for a full week..Once she gets older yea I can see a week vacation at some point but right now in my eyes she is to young. I can just see the vacation coming out in an anger outburst from the gparents on how I am controlling or something or other..

All of these are valid reasons for you to say no.  You don't even have to cite them.

zyrs

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Re: Being polite when saying no to grandchild vacation
« Reply #64 on: February 06, 2013, 05:27:13 PM »
OP, I think you have made the right choice for your daughter in keeping her home, especially with the update.  I hope your In-laws have taken your polite no to heart.