Am I supposed to bring a birthday gift?

[AmethystAnne]

Go through the Walgreens and get her something from the toy section.

(my vote: one of those "magic slates")

And put in a note that says, "Everybody deserves a toy on their birthday."

Done!

I like the idea of " Everybody deserves a toy on their birthday."  My personal choice would be a Slinky. 

[kudeebee]

Joining the discussion late--you are at the party, I am sure.  You were invited at the last minute, there are no shops in your town, aunt is hard to buy for, you don't give her a gift normally.  So, I would just take a card and be done with it. (Don't say anything about not having time to get a gift, late invite, etc.  Just let it drop.) 

[Sharnita]

I see it a bit differently.  She gets you a gift every year and party or not, her birthday come the same time every year.  I would feel some responsibility as an adult to get a gift for her.  Maybe a dinner, an experience, something. 

[oceanus]

OP, I get the feeling that you don't like your aunt all that much, and that you really don't want to go to her birthday party.  You haven't said one positive thing about her, and you're looking for reasons not to go and not to get her anything.

If you do decide to go, the thing to do is get her a card and maybe a bunch of fresh flowers (you can get some very nice ones from a grocery store).  It's past time for your to return the kindness she had extended on your birthday.

[Yvaine]

OP, I get the feeling that you don't like your aunt all that much

I read it more as annoyance with the cousin's wife.

[lilblu]

So I went to the party and the only people that gave cards or gifts were the people who had several days advanced notice of the party (the host and her adult son). I won't say what I did, but I'm happy with my decision. I appreciate the advice I received here. I'm going to make a note of the gift ideas for future reference. I particularly like the one about the lottery tickets. The only bad thing about that is if the recipient won big money, I'd be kind of upset that I didn't save that ticket for myself. 

I think my aunt was pleased that we all were there and that was good enough for her. To be honest though, I wish I hadn't gone. I didn't enjoy myself and became irritated at some things they said (like racist remarks). Plus, I'm very shy and verbally inarticulate, so they did all the talking and me and two other relatives just sat there listening. We were bored out of our minds. But in the future, I don't think I'll be attending anymore parties thrown by my cousin's wife. Everytime she has a party, I never have a good time and wished I hadn't gone. But like I said, if my aunt was happy then I guess that's all that matters.

Thanks again for the advice.

[secretrebel]

A lottery ticket is a terrible gift. Don't do that. It's either a worthless piece of paper or money with a law suit attached

[scotcat60]

Or tuck some money in the card and say you're sorry you didn't have time to buy a gift, and would she like to buy one of her own choosing. I got a gift card from Marks and Spencer for a friend which said "Keep Calm, and Choose Your Own Gift" on the front.

[peaches]

But like I said, if my aunt was happy then I guess that's all that matters.

It truly is what matters most.

I'm glad you were able to be there for your aunt.

[oceanus]

A lottery ticket is a terrible gift. Don't do that. It's either a worthless piece of paper or money with a law suit attached

Lawsuit? 
When my nieces and nephews were young they LOVED getting lottery scratch-offs.  They liked the actual scratching and occasionally they won a few dollars.  However, I wouldn't give lottery tickets to an adult for a gift.

[Sharnita]

A lottery ticket is a terrible gift. Don't do that. It's either a worthless piece of paper or money with a law suit attached

Lawsuit? 
When my nieces and nephews were young they LOVED getting lottery scratch-offs.  They liked the actual scratching and occasionally they won a few dollars.  However, I wouldn't give lottery tickets to an adult for a gift.

Technically, I think adults are the only ones who can legally claim a lottery win.  As far as a lawsuit, I think the poster is referring to cases where people have given tickets, only to try to claim the win when it turned out to be a big money maker.

[oceanus]

A lottery ticket is a terrible gift. Don't do that. It's either a worthless piece of paper or money with a law suit attached

Lawsuit? 
When my nieces and nephews were young they LOVED getting lottery scratch-offs.  They liked the actual scratching and occasionally they won a few dollars.  However, I wouldn't give lottery tickets to an adult for a gift.

Technically, I think adults are the only ones who can legally claim a lottery win.  As far as a lawsuit, I think the poster is referring to cases where people have given tickets, only to try to claim the win when it turned out to be a big money maker.

The parents of my niece and nephew claimed the prizes and then gave them the money, which, as I said was only a few dollars.  The fun for the kids was the actual scratching. As far as a lawsuit, yes, I’m aware that there have been cases where people (usually office workers) got into litigation over the winnings when they didn’t have a prior written contract agreement (if indeed that was what the poster was referring to). 

I prefer not to derail the thread with further discussion about the legalities of claiming lottery winnings - $1 or $100M.

All that aside, as I said, I personally don’t feel that a lottery ticket – scratch-off or online – is a decent birthday gift for an adult.

[Elegiac]

My brother is a big coffee drinker who is hard to buy for - he always buys things for himself, so I honestly have no idea.  One year, I got him a nice coffee mug and some flavoured creamer - he loved that gift.