General Etiquette > Life...in general

Still My Money or Now Her Money?

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Daquiri40:
This happened to me a few years ago and I still wonder if I was rude.  Please settle this for me E-Hellions.

I went on an international trip with my boyfriend and his son-in-law and daughter.  We were on a ferry boat going to another country.  I bought an internet card so I could read my E-Mail as this was a long trip.  I tried using the Internet and it was so slow and frustrating, I gave up.  My BF's daughter was bored so I let her use the Internet card so she pass some time.  I don't remember the exact wording I used when I handed the card over.

A little while passes and I see the daughter sitting with her husband.  I said, "did you use the internet?"  She said no that it was too slow, so she cashed in the Internet card.  I said, "that money is mine."  She gave me back the cash but was miffed at me.  My BF agreed with her that I was rude to ask for the money.

Was I?

CakeBeret:
Heck no. Of course it was your money. She was rude for trying to bilk cash out of a nice gesture.

TurtleDove:
Unless I completely misunderstood the situation, you were not rude and I can't really see any scenario where the daughter would be entitled to the money.  I don't know how much money we are talking about, and I may have chosen to just eat the loss to not rock the boat (no pun intended) but the daughter certainly is not entitled to a windfall there.

MariaE:
I'm of two minds. It depends on whether you loaned her the internet card (expecting to try again yourself later) or whether you gave it to her.

If it was the former, then she was definitely rude and you were fine.

If it was the latter, then I can't quite figure out where the line goes that makes it a gift for her to do with as she pleased. My gut feeling says she's still rude, because presumably the only reason you didn't cash it in yourself was to let her use it, but I'm not sure.

Miss Unleaded:

--- Quote from: MariaE on February 11, 2013, 10:59:37 AM ---I'm of two minds. It depends on whether you loaned her the internet card (expecting to try again yourself later) or whether you gave it to her.

If it was the former, then she was definitely rude and you were fine.

If it was the latter, then I can't quite figure out where the line goes that makes it a gift for her to do with as she pleased. My gut feeling says she's still rude, because presumably the only reason you didn't cash it in yourself was to let her use it, but I'm not sure.

--- End quote ---

I agree with this.  I know on this forum people often say that once you give something you lose control over it, but this is one of those situations where the rules are not so clear.

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