General Etiquette > Life...in general

Crocodile Tears

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LeveeWoman:

--- Quote from: SPuck on February 15, 2013, 10:24:27 AM ---So after reading some of the other threads posted on the board about dealing with people who blow small problems out of proportion, I was wondering what is the best way to deal with someone who cries? Rising above the fray is easier with anger because people outside of the situation won't judge you. On the other hand I could understand people taking pause to responding coldly or walking away from someone who crying. On the other hand I wouldn't always want to be feigning sympathy for someone who always cries over split milk. What is the best way to handle someone who over reacts by crying all the time? Whether they are doing it purposely or because they don't know other ways to express themselves?

--- End quote ---

To me, crocodile tears are shed by people who manipulate others.

FlyingBaconMouse:

--- Quote from: QueenofAllThings on February 15, 2013, 10:39:36 AM ---As someone who often bursts into tears when angry (and believe me, I wish I had control over it), I don't think that responding coldly is helpful.  The emotions are genuine, even if it may seem silly that I'm crying. I don't, however, feign tears to get my way, and have no patience with that sort of behavior.  The trick is differentiating between the two.

--- End quote ---

I agree. If I am crying in an outside-my-house situation (barring something bad actually happening to myself or someone else), it is generally from frustration or anger, less "me crying" than "me not yelling." I will also probably be apologizing as I break down, so I would want it to just be ignored beyond that point.

SPuck:

--- Quote from: LeveeWoman on February 15, 2013, 11:21:26 AM ---To me, crocodile tears are shed by people who manipulate others.

--- End quote ---

That was what I was referring to. The problem is it is hard to tell, and even if you know that someone is a manipulative liar, it is hard not to look like the bad guy.

LeveeWoman:

--- Quote from: SPuck on February 15, 2013, 11:30:29 AM ---
--- Quote from: LeveeWoman on February 15, 2013, 11:21:26 AM ---To me, crocodile tears are shed by people who manipulate others.

--- End quote ---

That was what I was referring to. The problem is it is hard to tell, and even if you know that someone is a manipulative liar, it is hard not to look like the bad guy.

--- End quote ---

That's what the manipulative liar is counting on. I'd distance myself from such a person.

Zilla:
If it's a frequent occurrence, I would ignore the tears and treat it as an outburst of words.  And comfort her as if she said something rather cried.  Crying is just an expression of sorts.  If they are crocodile tears, she would use lying words.  Same thing. 


In other words, don't react to the tears, just to the words/situation they represent.

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