Author Topic: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks  (Read 4066 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Winterlight

  • On the internet, no one can tell you're a dog- arf.
  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 9886
Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« on: February 22, 2013, 12:06:50 PM »
link

Quote
Dean Cain, who was engaged to the singer for about a year starting in 1997, tells People, "I'm saddened to hear of her passing, but I'm not surprised."

Apparently, it wasn't drugs and alcohol that ultimately forced the former Lois & Clark star to break off their union, but McCready's manipulative, dishonest behavior. "She was never abusive or addictive with me, but red flags were everywhere," he tells the magazine. "I saw all the bad signs and told her to get out." To escape the situation, he had to leave his own home for a hotel. "Everything she did was a manipulation of sorts. She would just get combative."

You've been split up for fifteen years. She died five days ago. You couldn't wait to trash her to the press? What about a simple, "My thoughts are with her children at this terrible time?"
If wisdomís ways you wisely seek,
Five things observe with care,
To whom you speak,
Of whom you speak,
And how, and when, and where.
Caroline Lake Ingalls

Sharnita

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 21526
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #1 on: February 22, 2013, 03:29:07 PM »
It is possible she put him through hell.  I feel badly for her kids but I feel badly for everyone who tried to help and love her and suffered as a result.  I don't know what she siad or did to him and I don't know what pain or scars he still bears.  If I recall he was on a tv show with Chirs Kyle who just died tragically.  Then this happened.  Ideally he would have said something different but then ideally she would be alive and wouldn't have hurt the people she loved.

TurtleDove

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6131
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #2 on: February 22, 2013, 03:33:32 PM »
POD to Sharnita.  I don't see how what he said was trashing her.

oceanus

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 693
  • pronounced o-see-ANN-us
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #3 on: February 22, 2013, 03:40:08 PM »
I think that regardless of veracity, Deanís remarks were in very poor taste.  Iím not saying he should be a hypocrite or throw praise at someone who he doesnít feel deserves it, but he should have said less and worded it differently.

audrey1962

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4322
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #4 on: February 22, 2013, 03:42:51 PM »
I think that when we lose a loved one, especially from suicide, we're not always thinking straight. I try not to judge those who have lost someone.

Amava

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4751
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #5 on: February 22, 2013, 03:45:59 PM »
I think you have to be very careful believing what words the media put into someone's mouth.
Take it with a kilo of salt.

TurtleDove

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6131
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #6 on: February 22, 2013, 03:53:51 PM »
I also think this is the important part:
Quote
As for McCready's sons, Cain is heartbroken. "My first thought was of the poor kids. To think about the legacy those boys have been left, it's just tragic. ... All her troubles were self-inflicted. She had everything. She was a tremendous talent but everything about it was a waste."



The bolded is spot on.  I believe suicide is incredibly selfish.  There is no way to sugarcoat what she did.

Twik

  • A Pillar of the Forum
  • *****
  • Posts: 28641
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #7 on: February 22, 2013, 05:07:28 PM »
I wonder if the remarks are those he sent out, or a rather unprepared response on having a reporter call him and ask for comments? If they were deliberately released, I would consider them very poor taste. But if he got a call from a reporter, who got him reminiscing in an unguarded way about a girl he'd once loved, they're less offensive.
My cousin's memoir of love and loneliness while raising a child with multiple disabilities will be out on Amazon soon! Know the Night, by Maria Mutch, has been called "full of hope, light, and companionship for surviving the small hours of the night."

Dalek

  • Jr. Member
  • *
  • Posts: 85
  • Am not amused!
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #8 on: February 22, 2013, 05:38:01 PM »
As long as Cain isn't telling her family to stop grieving and expecting her mom to hate her, I think he's fine. He probably should have declined the interview though.
I don't want to live on this planet anymore.

TurtleDove

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 6131
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #9 on: February 22, 2013, 06:01:55 PM »
I don't think Dean did anything wrong. I don't like it when people who have died are turned into different people altogether in the memories of those who lived them. Especially in cases of suicide, I don't grasp the desire to honor the person or look for a reason for the senseless decision. I think it's really harmful because it sends the message that there was a justifiable reason, if only we look hard enough and long enough. I also think "honoring" people who commit suicide sends an awful message of " here is a way to get people to notice you and say nice things about you."

cross_patch

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 170
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #10 on: February 22, 2013, 08:17:00 PM »
I don't think Dean did anything wrong. I don't like it when people who have died are turned into different people altogether in the memories of those who lived them. Especially in cases of suicide, I don't grasp the desire to honor the person or look for a reason for the senseless decision. I think it's really harmful because it sends the message that there was a justifiable reason, if only we look hard enough and long enough. I also think "honoring" people who commit suicide sends an awful message of " here is a way to get people to notice you and say nice things about you."

That is frankly offensive to me. People do not generally commit suicide because they 'want someone to notice them and say nice things about them'.

Sharnita

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 21526
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #11 on: February 22, 2013, 08:21:11 PM »
I don't think Dean did anything wrong. I don't like it when people who have died are turned into different people altogether in the memories of those who lived them. Especially in cases of suicide, I don't grasp the desire to honor the person or look for a reason for the senseless decision. I think it's really harmful because it sends the message that there was a justifiable reason, if only we look hard enough and long enough. I also think "honoring" people who commit suicide sends an awful message of " here is a way to get people to notice you and say nice things about you."

That is frankly offensive to me. People do not generally commit suicide because they 'want someone to notice them and say nice things about them'.

I think that people might imagine how people will react "when I am gone".  I also think that OP has had very real and personal experience with this topic that informs her views, as many of us might.  Somebody else might have views that are shaped by their own experiences.

oceanus

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 693
  • pronounced o-see-ANN-us
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #12 on: February 22, 2013, 09:03:20 PM »
I don't think Dean did anything wrong. I don't like it when people who have died are turned into different people altogether in the memories of those who lived them. Especially in cases of suicide, I don't grasp the desire to honor the person or look for a reason for the senseless decision. I think it's really harmful because it sends the message that there was a justifiable reason, if only we look hard enough and long enough. I also think "honoring" people who commit suicide sends an awful message of " here is a way to get people to notice you and say nice things about you."

Who was "honoring" Mindy McCready, and who was "honoring" suicide? ??? 

The issue is "Is it okay to give an interview trashing someone who just died that you had a relationship with 15 yrs ago?"
« Last Edit: February 22, 2013, 09:06:03 PM by oceanus »

AustenFan

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 508
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #13 on: February 22, 2013, 09:07:08 PM »
So it's now universally agreed he was trashing her? That's a heck of an interesting assumption, Oceanus.


oceanus

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 693
  • pronounced o-see-ANN-us
Re: Mindy McCready's ex-fiance speaks
« Reply #14 on: February 22, 2013, 09:10:25 PM »
So it's now universally agreed he was trashing her? That's a heck of an interesting assumption, Oceanus.
I don't know what you mean by "universally" agreed.  I said it; I wasn't speaking for the universe.  I'm not that powerful.

Yes, *I* feel he trashed her.
« Last Edit: February 22, 2013, 09:12:57 PM by oceanus »