This story has gone nuts on a mothering forum I visit.
Legally in Australia (where this happend) you can breatfeed where ever the heck you like. Covering up is all well and good but I can tell you now many babies, including my own refused to feed under a blanket. So would I quite frankly. If I did try, she yanked it off.
Also when you are breastfeeding you can't see anything, the baby's head is in the road. Even my newborn covered 90% of my E cups. If you happend to look over at the exact right time you might catch a peak at nipple when attaching or unattaching but otherwise there isn't anyhting to see.
Babies are entitled to be fed where they like. If people have an issue they need to deal. It isn't rude to breast or bottle feed a hungry baby. Just because generic you feels offended, doesn't make it wrong or rude. I get offended by people walking around in too small clothing but I wouldn't go as far as calling them rude because that is my issue not theirs.
What really get me is that fact people complain about breastfeeding but had not problems with woman in top/swimwear that shows far more than you'd see on a breast feeding mother
I'm afraid that this is exactly the kind of attitude I was talking about when I suggested a little compromise on BOTH sides. I don't think a reasonable attempt to keep the parts of the breast it's not normally legal to expose in public covered is too much to ask. "Legal" is not the same as "polite" or "considerate." Now, if you happen to be breastfeeding on a topless beach, be my guest :-).
And on the other side, I think that making a big deal out of a momentary, accidental exposure because the baby yanks the blanket away or unexpectedly unlatches is something of an overreaction.
In essence: Moms, please make a reasonable effort to be discreet. Non-Moms, sometimes a bit of momentary blindness is a kind gesture.
The problem is discreet feeding still gets mother's abused which is my issue. I've been told off for feeding when they only way the person could see anything was by standing over me. So the only defence I have is to throw the law at them. If they aren't going to be polite, I'm going to use my impoliet legal response.
I have been in this situation only a small handful of times over the course of my nursing LK. If someone disapproved, I mostly just got a dirty look, which was easy enough to ignore.
Those who choose to be confrontational often cannot be corrected without additional rudeness occurring, so it is often best and (safest) to think of it in terms of manners and not in terms of rights.
If you are nursing your baby discreetly (ie, in such a manner as to not announce to the world that "hey look at me, I'm nursing") in an appropriate place (ie, somewhere you might also give a baby a bottle), then you are doing the equivalent of eating with your mouth closed, using a napkin, and generally showing good table manners. Someone who chooses to confront you for this may be likened to someone who comes up and screams at you for eating meat.
But if you basically pop it out for the world to see and do it loudly and obtrusively, then you are doing the equivalent of chomping your food with your mouth open, slurping your soup loudly, and generally showing terrible table manners. Someone who chooses to confront you is still being impolite, as we all know it is rude to point out the rudeness of others, but it has to be acknowledged that they do have a point.
My personal experience was as follows - LK would NOT nurse under a blanket. She'd scream and squirm and throw the blanket off her head. So we sat down at home and learned to nurse discreetly in front of a mirror. I have to say, by the time she was weaned, we were both extremely proficient at very subtle "snuggle nursing" (the kind of nursing where you cannot tell nursing is happening and it just looks like a mom snuggling a baby) without a blanket. I could nurse anywhere, though I mostly preferred comfortable locations.
The only place I could not, oddly enough, was at my parents house.
We were there one afternoon for lunch. Everyone was in the dining room on the main floor. I ducked downstairs to the rec room to sit on the couch and nurse. Now, the rec room was out of sight of the dining room, but one had to walk past the entrance to the rec room to get further downstairs to where the drinks were stored. I waited until everyone was about to start eating before I ducked out. I figured that way, the chances of being interrupted would be slim.
Two of my brothers in law popped down to get some more pop. They walked past me. They discreetly looked the other way and did not acknowledge me. I had absolutely nothing showing as LK was completely covering my entire torso.
Nevertheless, my sister came down and began to scream at me for being so indecent. I should have gone into a bedroom and shut the door. I should never expose myself like that to my brothers in law. Didn't I know how embarrassing it was for them? Etc.
I was quite shaken, but chose not to engage her. First, it would have been utterly unproductive. Second, I could not have done so without being rude. Getting into a confrontation would have been reciprocally rude.
LK weaned shortly thereafter, so I never needed to nurse her at my parents house again. But if I needed to? I would have done the same thing over again. The bedrooms were not comfortable for nursing, and if anyone else needed to bottlefeed, I expect they would have removed themselves to the same place I did. It was dim and quiet, an ideal and comfortable location for feeding an infant.
Topic: A minefield of etiquette and/or decency? Public breast feeding (Read 16228 times)