Author Topic: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators  (Read 14565 times)

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KenveeB

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #30 on: February 26, 2013, 10:32:28 PM »
My grandmother isn't really a sleep dictator, but cannot understand why people aren't all up by 7 am, even on weekends.  If you ask her, she'll say something like, "Well, if you wait any longer than that, daylight's slipping by!". I'm a natural early bird, so I don't mind, but it was kind of irritating to have her call me super early on some Saturday thinking I should be up. 

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suzieQ

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #31 on: February 26, 2013, 10:41:27 PM »
My sleep dictator has done such lovely things as pulling the covers off of me to remake the bed after I am asleep. Turning on the overhead light when he comes to get ready for bed, etc. Then when he finally does come to bed, he jerks as he falls to sleep. Since he has already woken me up, it takes me FOREVER to get back to sleep because just as I start to drift off, his arm - which is lying across me - jerks and I'm wide awake again!
Sleep deprivation can make people mad enough to kill! I had to be very blunt with him and he has stopped the lights, although he does still remake the bed at times. His PA way of letting me know I didn't do a good enough job, I'm sure.

Sometimes (rarely) he will be in bed already, watching TV. I come to bed to sleep and he won't turn off the TV. So after trying to fall asleep for a while, I give it up and go to sleep in the recliner in the living room. Only to have him wake me up an hour later when he is ready for me to come to bed because he "can't sleep without me in the bed!" So now I have to fall back asleep again! With the man who jerks as he falls asleep. Did I mention sleep deprivation can make people crazy?! And I am pretty much incapable of taking a nap during the day unless I am sick.

Firecat

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #32 on: February 26, 2013, 10:46:45 PM »
My sleep dictator has done such lovely things as pulling the covers off of me to remake the bed after I am asleep. Turning on the overhead light when he comes to get ready for bed, etc. Then when he finally does come to bed, he jerks as he falls to sleep. Since he has already woken me up, it takes me FOREVER to get back to sleep because just as I start to drift off, his arm - which is lying across me - jerks and I'm wide awake again!
Sleep deprivation can make people mad enough to kill! I had to be very blunt with him and he has stopped the lights, although he does still remake the bed at times. His PA way of letting me know I didn't do a good enough job, I'm sure.

Sometimes (rarely) he will be in bed already, watching TV. I come to bed to sleep and he won't turn off the TV. So after trying to fall asleep for a while, I give it up and go to sleep in the recliner in the living room. Only to have him wake me up an hour later when he is ready for me to come to bed because he "can't sleep without me in the bed!" So now I have to fall back asleep again! With the man who jerks as he falls asleep. Did I mention sleep deprivation can make people crazy?! And I am pretty much incapable of taking a nap during the day unless I am sick.

And you're letting him live? You're way nicer than I am  >:D

SiotehCat

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #33 on: February 26, 2013, 10:58:33 PM »
Dh and I have a "bedtime" at midnight. It started because I was staying awake way past midnight. It bothered Dh that I was awake so late and it made me lag at work the next day. So, I agreed to be in bed and ready to sleep by midnight. In theory, he is suppose to be too, but I have no way of knowing. On normal nights, I knock out by 10.


suzieQ

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #34 on: February 26, 2013, 11:02:12 PM »
My sleep dictator has done such lovely things as pulling the covers off of me to remake the bed after I am asleep. Turning on the overhead light when he comes to get ready for bed, etc. Then when he finally does come to bed, he jerks as he falls to sleep. Since he has already woken me up, it takes me FOREVER to get back to sleep because just as I start to drift off, his arm - which is lying across me - jerks and I'm wide awake again!
Sleep deprivation can make people mad enough to kill! I had to be very blunt with him and he has stopped the lights, although he does still remake the bed at times. His PA way of letting me know I didn't do a good enough job, I'm sure.

Sometimes (rarely) he will be in bed already, watching TV. I come to bed to sleep and he won't turn off the TV. So after trying to fall asleep for a while, I give it up and go to sleep in the recliner in the living room. Only to have him wake me up an hour later when he is ready for me to come to bed because he "can't sleep without me in the bed!" So now I have to fall back asleep again! With the man who jerks as he falls asleep. Did I mention sleep deprivation can make people crazy?! And I am pretty much incapable of taking a nap during the day unless I am sick.

And you're letting him live? You're way nicer than I am  >:D

I think the only reason he is alive is because I'm just so darn *tired* at that time of night that killing him seems to be too much effort.  >:D

MizA

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #35 on: February 27, 2013, 01:14:55 AM »
My DF is up most days by 7 to work from home. Since I've been off on injury from work for the past six weeks, I've noticed a trend with him...

I like to go to bed around midnight to 0100, and get up between 0900 and 1000. he, on the other hand, will push himself to stay up until 0300 or so, and be up by 0800, ostensibly to work- he works from home. And then I get to hear allll about how I "sure sleep a lot".

However.

On average, about 3/5 working days per week, I come downstairs after waking up and find him crashed out on the couch. It's taking all my reserve to not point out how he sure naps a lot.

Interestingly, it took he and I living together for about four months for him to realize that the reason that I'm often quite tired is that shift work messes up one's circadian rhythms. It took me almost defenestrating him when he awoke me during my day's sleep and then uttered "Oh, sorry, didn't realize you were napping". After the resultant discussion, he certainly understands that sleeping after a night shift is certainly not a "nap", and that prematurely awakening doesn't make me the most pleasant creature on the planet.
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Coruscation

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #36 on: February 27, 2013, 01:33:22 AM »
I've known parents (not mine, thankfully!) who refuse to let their teenagers sleep in on weekends. Not sure whether that counts as being a sleep dictator or not.

And POD to the posters who have stated that people who are "night owls" aren't necessarily lazy. For example, on weekends, I like to go to bed at midnight, and sleep in til about 9am. My DF's mother once commented that that was a bit "lazy". But the irony is, she goes to bed at 7pm and wakes up at 5am. She is getting one more hour of sleep than me, yet I'm the lazy one?!

That would be my parents. While my friends would be sleeping until noon on weekends, I would be up before 8:00 a.m. There was no sleeping in, ever, unless my sister or I were sick. Summer was the same. No sleeping in then either.

In the parents defense. I let my son stay up to midnight on Friday night. Then he wanted to sleep until midday, then couldn't go to sleep Saturday night becasue it turned out he'd stayed up until four. It was Tuesday before his sleep pattern was sorted enough that I could get him out of bed at a reasonable hour without physically dragging him out of bed and pouring water over him. He goes to sleep before I do now, or else. Too bad for him I like to sleep early.
« Last Edit: February 27, 2013, 02:02:24 AM by Coruscation »

jedikaiti

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #37 on: February 27, 2013, 01:49:15 AM »
When my significant other first moved in, our different sleep schedules was quite a bone of contention for us.  I work 8 to 5 and have to up no later than 6:30 to make it on work on time.  I like to go to bed early, usually around 9:30 or so, not necessarily to go to sleep right away, but to read or watch tv and start winding down.  My BF on the other hand is something of a night owl, and due to his work schedule can sleep in to 9:00 or so in the mornings.  For months, he just could not understand why I wanted to go to bed so early and would get highly offended, as if I were doing it to get away from him.  We would actually argue about it on a regular basis.  He would make me feel guilty, so I would end up staying up later and be really irritable the next day at work.  Finally one day the subject came up in front of my parents, and my mom said "Well, Ginger G has always liked going to bed early, even as a child!"  I guess it finally clicked for him, and now I can go to bed when I want with no complaints from him!

Since I coined the phrase, I likened food to sleep, in that it's something we have to do daily, and something many people derive pleasure from, so I made the analogy that a food dictator would be like a sleep dictator; that is, someone who tell you that you WILL go to bed at this time, and wake up at this time, and you'll sleep in this room, and you'll sleep in these bedclothes, and no backtalk!

My Dad tried that with me back in high school - I liked to stay up late and sleep in on weekends, and his definition of "sleeping late" was anything after 7:30 and if I slept past 8, the day was wasted. Of course, even on school nights I was usually up later than he was, and on Saturday & Sunday, unless I had a prior commitment, anything in the AM hours was a good time to get up.

He finally learned that getting me out of bed before I was ready to get up just got him a walking pile of cranky and miserable and useless. And possibly a morning of retaliatory heavy metal at full volume. (I was not e-Hell approved at that age.)
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jedikaiti

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #38 on: February 27, 2013, 01:50:47 AM »
I haven't read the other thread. Can someone give me some examples of what a sleep dictator does? I'm picturing my control freak relative standing in her guest bedroom door pointing a finger at me while I'm bundled up in her guest bed ordering me (yelling at me) "You must sleep 7.2 hours!", turning out the light & closing the door.

My sleep dictator likes to sit on my chest and rub his chin on my nose and generally poke me until I give him some loving. His cute furry face and whiskers ensure that he is not thrown from the bed although I do tell him it is sleepy time and we need some sleep within a few minutes. He usually accepts that and curls up for a nap next to me. or jumps off to chase imaginary prey throughout the house.

Thanks Wolfie. I have a sleep dictator then that I love very, very much. Much better than what I was picturing before.

My sleep dictators try their darnedest to keep me in bed for as long as possible. It seems I make a good mattress.
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jedikaiti

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #39 on: February 27, 2013, 02:07:48 AM »
Closest thing to a sleep dictator I get are the people on me to not drink caffeine at night "because you'll never get to sleep", actually caffeine helps me sleep. I'm mildly ADHD, and I figure the caffeine helps activate the part of my brain that calms things down.

I am not so mildly ADHD, and suffered several years of chronic insomnia after I gave up caffeine, but before I was diagnosed. I slept, but only with medication, or after a couple hours of trying and waking up at least every 2 hours.

For a lot of people, it's not as simple as just going to bed earlier. I generally sleep pretty well, and do just fine on about 7 hours a night. But unless I'm actually sick, it's difficult to impossible for me to fall asleep before 11:00 pm. And I am not at my best first thing in the morning. I do attempt to be civil, at least, but it's not the time to have serious conversations or ask me to make decisions.

For me, it's always been that, no matter how tired, I always perk up a LOT around 9 or 9:30pm. If I'm not already out cold by then (so, unless I'm sick or somehow on a totally wonked schedule), sleep before 12 is nigh impossible.

My sleep dictator has done such lovely things as pulling the covers off of me to remake the bed after I am asleep. Turning on the overhead light when he comes to get ready for bed, etc. Then when he finally does come to bed, he jerks as he falls to sleep. Since he has already woken me up, it takes me FOREVER to get back to sleep because just as I start to drift off, his arm - which is lying across me - jerks and I'm wide awake again!
Sleep deprivation can make people mad enough to kill! I had to be very blunt with him and he has stopped the lights, although he does still remake the bed at times. His PA way of letting me know I didn't do a good enough job, I'm sure.

Sometimes (rarely) he will be in bed already, watching TV. I come to bed to sleep and he won't turn off the TV. So after trying to fall asleep for a while, I give it up and go to sleep in the recliner in the living room. Only to have him wake me up an hour later when he is ready for me to come to bed because he "can't sleep without me in the bed!" So now I have to fall back asleep again! With the man who jerks as he falls asleep. Did I mention sleep deprivation can make people crazy?! And I am pretty much incapable of taking a nap during the day unless I am sick.

And you're letting him live? You're way nicer than I am  >:D

AND you haven't kicked him out yet? You're a WAY better person than I am!
"The problem with re-examining your brilliant ideas is that more often than not, you discover they are the intellectual equivalent of saying, 'Hold my beer and watch this!'" - Cindy Couture

Raintree

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #40 on: February 27, 2013, 02:09:52 AM »
A friend tried to invite me to one of those business networking meetings that start at 7 AM. I've tried these before and they suck. It not only wrecks me and renders me completely useless and unproductive for the whole day; it also takes me an extra day or so to recover.

So I declined, and she said, "I don't want to hear any excuses. I come in from Faraway Suburb every morning and I manage to get here for 7:30."

Yeah, but you do it every day. My usual workday doesn't start till much later (my choice) and to me, that 7 AM meeting is like crossing four time zones. Would you like to come to a meeting with me at midnight? Didn't think so.

blarg314

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #41 on: February 27, 2013, 02:29:40 AM »

I've definitely been through periods in my life that involved chronic sleep deprivation, due to work or school schedules. And I find that at some point, my body forces me to take a rest, usually by getting sick. If I'm well rested in the first place, I can handle a few nights of bad sleep without too much effect, though.

In university, it wasn't too bad, because I could crash between semesters and catch up. But once I started full time work, I lost that crash period - a typical vacation allocation for a junior worker is not enough to do that with.

My personal rhythm is moderate night owl, which can slip to extreme night owl if I let myself. I am pretty good at staying up late, but I simply cannot fall asleep when I'm not tired, even with drugs, so going to bed early is generally not a possibility.

About once or twice a year I end up with a work related trip which involves missing a night of sleep, due to time zone issues. One trip, out of a week (so seven nights), I got six 'nights' of sleep.  But on one day my night of sleep was from 7am to 11am, then getting up, then going to bed at 10 pm to try to sleep before getting up at 6am to catch a flight. Unfortunately, issues of flight times and work schedules make this necessary.  By the end of the trip, I felt like death warmed over, and it took a good week to get back to normal, even though jet-lag doesn't affect me very much.



Last_Dance

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #42 on: February 27, 2013, 05:39:40 AM »
I can deal with both early mornings and late nights as long as I get enough sleep the night before. However, when I really need to sleep, do not stand between me and my bed. Results aren't pretty.

In everyday life, I'm a not-before-breakfast person: I usually say I'm not fully human until I've eaten something. My boyfriend, instead, is a not-before-coffee person.
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Margo

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #43 on: February 27, 2013, 07:53:19 AM »
I'm another who cannot function with insufficient sleep. I get physically ill quite fast if I'm sleep deprived. Also (and irritatingly) unless I am really ill, I can't sleep in in the morning (I can enjoy staying in bed, and reading, or whatever, but I can't sleep) so if I get tired, I have to go to bed early, as it's the only way I an ever catch up with sleep.

It's a bit frustrating, as I'm the only one one in my immediate family who is a morning person rather than an evening person, so if we're all back home (for christmas, for instance) I'll end up out of sync with everyone else!

I tend to be properly awake as soon as I wake up, but my mind must wake up faster than my body, as I can't eat anything until I've been awake for at least an hour.
his used to be very handy when I was a student - I would wake up at 6 or 6.30 and have an hour or two of total peace when I could concentrate on writing an essay, then by the time I was ready to face breakfast it was a much less antisocial time of day to be moving around the house, using the kitchen and potentially waking my housemates!

I'm fortunate not to have come across too many sleep-dictators, although I do have some relatives who are a bit that way inclined, and very inflexible. (one aunt came to visit me. I'd told her when we went to bed that I would not be awake/getting up before 8 (it was a weekend after a very long and exhausting week, and while I expected to wake earlier, I really wanted the extra duvet time!) but that she was welcome to help herself to drinks / breakfast if she wanted, if she woke earlier, and also, that she shouldn't feel she had to get up when I did if she wanted a lie-in.

She decided to bring me a cup of tea at 6.30 because she'd woken up and thought it was time to get up *Grrrr*

She's a nice person, but tends to assume that the way *she* does things is the best/only way for everyone.
« Last Edit: February 27, 2013, 08:04:26 AM by Margo »

suzieQ

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Re: s/o Food Dictators - Sleep Dictators
« Reply #44 on: February 27, 2013, 08:04:26 AM »
Forgot to mention my DS. As a toddler, we had to spank him to make him sleep at night. If he didn't cry, he didn't sleep. He would stay up all night and get into *everything*. We had to put a high lock on the door, so when he did stay up all night, he couldn't get out of the house.
I think the sleep issues are tied to his ASD. He can stay up 36 hours with no problem. Generally his sleep schedule now is to wake up about 2 in the afternoon, stay up all night and go to bed around 8 in the morning.
Makes it *really* difficult to get him to doctor appointments since I work 2-6 and need to make appointments in the mornings.