Author Topic: Please help me gain some perspective  (Read 3379 times)

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camlan

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Re: Please help me gain some perspective
« Reply #15 on: February 28, 2013, 09:02:08 AM »
Some co-workers of mine used to send me an email and then walk down to my office to ask me if I'd seen it. Usually, the email hadn't even popped up in Outlook yet. So I can understand a bit how the OP feels about this. I usually answered emails within 30 minutes of getting them, so it wasn't as if I ignored emails.

I finally just told everyone that either they could come to my office or they could email me, but doing both was driving me nuts. If it was important, then just come see me or pick up the phone and call me and ask me to come over to their office. If it could wait half an hour or so, then email me and I'd get back to them. It took a few weeks of reminding them, but they stopped the double communication after a while.
Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


TootsNYC

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Re: Please help me gain some perspective
« Reply #16 on: February 28, 2013, 09:21:37 AM »
Last week, she telephoned to ask me to look something up for her.  (We are way past New Biz, well into Customer Service Territory, so it's really her job.  But as I said in an earlier post, I've never failed to be helpful or prompt.)  So I responded, "Sure.  Let me get out of this other program and access the site.  <Waiting for website to load, still chattering>  You know, this website isn't password protected.  Anyone can go in and look this up."  She chirped, "I know, but I don't know how to navigate it as well as you, and it's just quicker for me to have you do it for me."

Grrrrr.

Grrrr is right.

A couple of options to suggest--one in bold, the other in blue. Use both or either.

Last week, she telephoned to ask me to look something up for her.  (...I've never failed to be helpful or prompt.)  So I responded, "Sure.  Let me get out of this other program and access the site finish what I'm on--it'll take me about 15 minutes.  <Waiting for website to load, still chattering>  You know, this website isn't password protected.  Anyone can go in and look this up. And since you don't really need me, I'm going to get back to my tasks. I'm sure you'll be fine. I didn't realize it was this easy."  She chirped, "I know, but I don't know how to navigate it as well as you, and it's just quicker for me to have you do it for me." You say: "hey, you know, that's not really fair. It's not quicker for *me* to do it. I've got other stuff that on my to-do list. I'm sure you'll get faster if you practice. So I'm going to bow out and let you learn."

Grrrrr.

And if it's her territory, say, "I'm not sure why you're asking me. That's Customer Service, right? I'm not really up on that sort of stuff, and I'm sort of busy right now. Can you figure it out yourself?"

Though I do like the "treat her as if you're training her. So have her do it on her screen. Or better yet, walk over to her desk and have her do it while you stand over her shoulder.

I used to get forwarded all the phone calls that came into the company if the caller didn't know who to contact. The receptionist didn't know either (she was really very ditzy). That's because if I got the call accidentally, I'd figure out who to forward it to. And since the call didn't come back to the receptionist, she kept sending EVERYBODY to me. It finally dawned on me how intrusive it was, and that I didn't have to be MORE helpful that the bare minimum. So I'd say, "I'm sorry, I don't work on that, and I don't really know who does, and I'm in the middle of something. So I'm going to forward you back to the receptionist. Good luck!"

Just refuse. Just make it LESS rewarding for her. Make "asking you for help" be MORE annoying than "doing it herself" or even "asking someone else."

EllenS

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Re: Please help me gain some perspective
« Reply #17 on: February 28, 2013, 01:58:52 PM »
Second the bounce-back idea.  Or else offer to help on your own schedule - very specifically, with the "yes...and" deflection

You: "Sure, I can help with that when I finish this task - so, around 2pm."
Her: "But can't you do it now?"
You: "I'm happy to do it as soon as I am free." (said with a big smile)

And then at my stated time I would let her know I was ready to walk her through her job, as described by Toots.