Author Topic: Scarves on head - non-religious  (Read 6624 times)

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RebeccainGA

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Scarves on head - non-religious
« on: March 11, 2013, 01:58:44 PM »
I've got a dilemma that has come up a few times, but now that I'm working in an office where the dress standards are higher than my last office by a considerable amount, I'm a bit baffled as to how to continue.

The background: I used to wear scarves, a LOT, when I was in college/just graduated. Long ones, square ones, all sizes and shapes. I wore them, most of the time, either tied around my head (covering most of my hair, which was and is long, and often worn in a bun) or tied around the bun with the ends trailing. Thanks to my mother's paranoia, I stopped wearing them like that post 9/11, even though they have no significance except that they are prettier than my hair.

I've now got this epic collection of large scarves. I'd like to start wearing them again. I'd like, occasionally, to not wear them around my neck, which seems to be the only way women around here wear them - and ideally, I'd like to wear them around my hair again (especially when it's really windy outside or if my hair is doing bad bad things, which it does occasionally). I'm normally in the camp of "I'd rather the bigot think I'm devout than the devout think I'm a bigot", but I'm not sure if it's not rude to... co-opt? I don't usually wear them in the headscarf style typical of the Muslim community (loosely draped around the face) but more of the Orthodox Jewish "cover all the hair" or the conservative Christian 'modesty' styles - ironically, have sold some of my scarves on e-bay, and those two communities are the ones that buy them!

Maybe I'm overthinking - but I certainly don't want to offend someone that wears their hair covered for a reason. I do, however, really want to start wearing these scarves again, and between my body style and my wardrobe, other than different variations of 'wear it around your neck' I can't figure out how in the world to wear them BUT around my head somewhere.

Judah

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #1 on: March 11, 2013, 02:02:22 PM »
I think you're over-thinking. Scarves have been worn to cover the head since there have been scarves, and it has nothing to do with religion.  I often wear a scarf to cover my head when it's cold or windy and I see other women do it often too. 
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Surianne

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #2 on: March 11, 2013, 02:04:24 PM »
I don't think there would be anything offensive about it.  As you've noted, more than one group uses them for different reasons (religion, modesty) and certainly there's an old Hollywood glamour feel to them as well.  So you wouldn't be appropriating a particular culture/religion's style at all.

I love headscarves.  I often wear some hippie-style around my hair, but letting my hair come out the back -- so different than the way you mean, but very fun too. 

WillyNilly

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #3 on: March 11, 2013, 02:05:38 PM »
There are about a billion and one reasons to wear fashion accessories, and you don't need to justify any of them. If I saw a woman with a scarf over here hair, if it looked nice probably all I'd think was "oh, isn't that pretty!"If it looked a bit odd (didn't match, or something) I might think "oh its probably religious" but honestly I'd just as likely think "wow she must be having a bad hair day" or wonder if the woman lost her hair, or had a bad incident with gum or scissors. I really can't imagine someone being offended that someone else likes and emulates their style, regardless of their reason for having the style.

Redwing

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #4 on: March 11, 2013, 02:07:52 PM »
And I'd be thinking, "Gosh, I wish I could pull that off."  But unfortunately for me, a scarf tied in my hair has never looked right.  Wish it did because I think it looks so pretty!

RingTailedLemur

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #5 on: March 11, 2013, 02:13:16 PM »
Wear them and don't worry.

I wear headscarves a lot because of severe eczema on my scalp.  The worst that has happened is someone assuming I am a nurse  :)

TurtleDove

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #6 on: March 11, 2013, 02:18:10 PM »
I sometimes wear scarves tied around my ponytail with the ends trailing (not over my head, but tied like a ribbon).  I also sometimes wear scarves as belts.  I have seen women who tie pretty scarves around the straps of their purses, sort of a decoration for the purse.

RebeccainGA

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #7 on: March 11, 2013, 02:19:04 PM »
Thanks, folks. Really. Around here (Atlanta area) I have seen exactly ONE person wearing a scarf that wasn't around her neck or obviously a religious observation - and she was a hairdresser, very fashion forward, and had it braided into her hair. Looked amazing. She's actually who got me thinking about wearing mine again.

lowspark

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #8 on: March 11, 2013, 02:42:05 PM »
I just googled images for "scarf on head fashion" and really, none of the pictures look like the wearer is doing it for religious reasons. Some of the scarves are so beautiful and there are so many ways to wear them.

Dalek

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #9 on: March 11, 2013, 02:52:04 PM »
How do you know what religion your customers are?
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Coralreef

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #10 on: March 11, 2013, 02:57:14 PM »
I can't wait for my hair to grow longer so I can use the scarves I have. 

I remember my mother wearing a scarf to go outside to protect her hair from the wind.  I don't think there has to be a religious reason to wear one.  Specially if you attach it in a way that is completely different from what a Muslin (or other religious denomination) woman would wear it. 

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RebeccainGA

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #11 on: March 11, 2013, 02:59:27 PM »
I just googled images for "scarf on head fashion" and really, none of the pictures look like the wearer is doing it for religious reasons. Some of the scarves are so beautiful and there are so many ways to wear them.
Good heavens - according to some of these articles, the way I used to wear my scarves is not only OK, but the new hot trend. I don't know what I'll do with myself, being fashionable!

RebeccainGA

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #12 on: March 11, 2013, 03:00:30 PM »
How do you know what religion your customers are?
Because to a person they all told me that "this scarf is perfect for me, since I've gone 'modestnik'/am Orthodox/etc." They were all hoping I had more in similar sizes, too, I think.

lowspark

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #13 on: March 11, 2013, 03:01:40 PM »
I just googled images for "scarf on head fashion" and really, none of the pictures look like the wearer is doing it for religious reasons. Some of the scarves are so beautiful and there are so many ways to wear them.
Good heavens - according to some of these articles, the way I used to wear my scarves is not only OK, but the new hot trend. I don't know what I'll do with myself, being fashionable!

Post a picture here! We want to see!  :)

jmarvellous

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Re: Scarves on head - non-religious
« Reply #14 on: March 11, 2013, 03:02:06 PM »
I love wearing scarves around my head! But I don't. I have been heckled for being Jewish, wearing a burka, being an old Polish granny and looking like Aunt Jemima. Now, ALL of these things are racist/bigoted and generally dumb ... so they don't actually hurt my feelings. But they do make me feel awkward, like I stand out, or like I am doing a disservice to those who do wear these scarves for personal reasons rather than hurt fashion (because, aside from telling someone to bu
zz off and quit being a bigot, I don't want to get in a fight over my headwear).

So I wear scarves folded over as headbands, rather than covering my whole head. Or around my neck or shoulders. Or I just ignore jerks and go for it, but I am less and less inclined to do so, even on really bad hair days.