Voicemail etiquette

[gollymolly2]

Could it be that those who do actually hate the way messages are left rather than the message itself?

Personally, I dislike the process of retrieving and listening to voicemails; it's rarely about content. There are certain types of voicemails that I think are useful - when someone needs to communicate a large amount of information and it doesn't need to be heard in a timely manner.  But otherwise, a "call me when you can" text or just a missed call is always preferable to having to go to the (admittedly minimal) trouble if having a voicemail.

Having said that, I don't think it's actually rude to leave a voicemail. I was just curious to hear perspectives on the issue.

Edited to fix quotes...

[Bexx27]

It's so self-centered to consider others rude or wrong for not using your preferred method of communication. If you (the call recipient) don't like checking your voicemail, that's your problem. Make your preference known, state in your greeting that you don't check messages or whatever, and don't get annoyed with the caller for communicating in a totally normal and non-rude way.

For me, leaving a message is how you let someone know why you called and whether or how urgently they should call you back. If someone calls and doesn't leave a message, I assume they don't expect a return call. On the other end, it's much easier for me to leave a voicemail than a text because I have a dumbphone with no keyboard configuration. If I actually know that someone prefers to be contacted a certain way -- for example, I know my brother hates voicemail and will call me back if he sees that I've called and not left a message, and I have several friends who only respond to texts -- I will use that method. But if I don't know your preferences I will default to my own, and it doesn't make me rude to do so.

[oceanus]

I’m really surprised and also puzzled by the voice mail hatred expressed by some people.  If someone has a hatred of voice mail, they should not have that option on their phone (doesn’t matter if it’s cell, business, land line) – for goodness sakes, have it disconnected/disabled!

It is not rude to leave a voice mail. 

I think we might agree that none of us are available 365/24/7 to take a phone call.  I received 2 voice mails messages today – one was from my dentist’s office to reschedule an appt, the other was from a friend giving me an address I needed.  So……since I was on a call and in the bathroom when these calls came, would it have been better to just let the phone ring and ring and ring?  Or would have been more “polite” for the callers to just hang up and keep calling and hanging up?   

Sure, some people misuse vm – they dodge calls, they use it to chat and leave long messages.  I don’t.  I use vm to let someone know I returned a call, or to leave and receive information.

As far as all the “effort” required  punching on a pass code to retrieve a message, well, it’s less effort that punching keys and typing a text message (something I’m not fond of).  And it’s less effort and expense than hiring a private secretary to answer calls, talk to the caller, and write a paper message.

A friend gets at least 4 voice mails every morning from his sales managers who are in various geographic areas.  It takes him less than 5 minutes to listen to the information. What is so wrong with that?

Those who hate voice mail, do you also hate answering machines (not as popular now)?  Are you angry that the person you called is not available at the second you choose to call?  Are you upset that you missed the call?  (Well, whose fault is that?)  Have you considered changing your vm announcement to “This is X, don’t leave a voive mail, just keep calling until you reach me or send me an email or letter via mail.  Thanks.” ?

I'm just not understanding why voice mails are creating such a problem. 

[bloo]

I loathe voicemail, but I use it because I loathe actually answering the phone even more.

I LOVE getting someone else's voicemail (yay I get to leave a message but get points for trying to call!).

I don't mind getting calls from my BFF(she'll call just to chat and she's interesting) but calls from ANYONE else (especially DH) always seem to somehow generate work for me.

[Please pass the Calgon]

If you need to leave a voicemail, then please, for the love of Pete, leave your name and number in a manner so that the person you are calling can actually return the call!

Podity-pod-POD... I get lots of voicemails at work, I don't consider them rude, but MANY can't be returned because the caller wouldn't speak clearly enough to be understood. When I leave a vm it's along the lines of "Hi, this is Calgon. My number is (xxx) xxx-xxxx and I'm calling regarding _______. Please call me back when you have a minute. Again, my name is Calgon & my number is (xxx) xxx-xxxx. Thank you!"

[Mammavan3]

I actually think it's - if not exactly rude - a little presumptuous or possibly arrogant to refuse to listen to voice mails. If you don't like the process, disconnect the service. But if I go to the trouble to call you and then listen to your outgoing message, I then have to type out a text laboriously when I could have taken less than ten seconds to say "This is Mammavan. Please return my call at XXX-XXX-XXXX.  I'll be available until  X p.m."

[MommyPenguin]

I'm only 32, but apparently I am ridiculously behind the times.  I don't text.  I don't really know how, my cell phone technically does it but it's expensive and really annoying to do, having to push each button a bunch of times to get a single letter (and the T9 thing or whatever it is never has any clue what I'm trying to type), I don't have a smart phone, etc.  We do use VOIP, though, so if you text our home phone, it emails the message to us.  Same with voicemail... if you leave us a voicemail, it emails it to us.  Which is really nice.  I love the idea of texting, it's just really inconvenient if you don't have a smartphone and don't use your cellphone for anything except emergencies.   But anyway, I don't really get hating voicemail, or calling people who called you back.  I generally try to leave concise, clear voicemails, though.  Sometimes when my mom leaves me a voicemail, I don't listen to the whole thing before I call her back, because they're always long and meandering and when I call her back she'll tell me the whole thing again anyway (nothing against my mom, she's sweet and wonderful, this is just her style).

[Awestruck Shmuck]

Leaving a voicemail isn't rude - it's a function that can be turned off, if the individual doesn't like listening to them!

I love voice mail, I am looking for a new job, organising a friends baby shower and planning a wedding - so between those calls, and calls from family/friends, I need to know what I need in front of me to answer the phone! If I don't recognise the number, I don't answer - unless I'm in job hunt mode, in which case I answer the phone with my 'give me a job, please!!' voice lol

[WillyNilly]

...If someone has a hatred of voice mail, they should not have that option on their phone (doesn’t matter if it’s cell, business, land line) – for goodness sakes, have it disconnected/disabled!..

...If you don't like the process, disconnect the service...

Leaving a voicemail isn't rude - it's a function that can be turned off, if the individual doesn't like listening to them!..

How does one disconnect or turn off voicemail? I have never heard of anyone being able to do that and I would LOVE and welcome any insight onto how to do it. My phone (Android Galaxy) doesn't seem to offer the option, nor does my provider (Sprint).

The reality is in my experience, VM is not a function people can turn off. Its a necessary evil included with the convenience and awesomeness of having a cell phone. I do have my out-going message set to inform people to "please not leave a message", but I really don't know what else I can do.

[oceanus]

I do know someone who had the voice mail function on their cell phone disabled by calling the carrier.

In order to set up voice mail on a phone, one has to go thru some steps (password, recording an answering announcement).  Just don’t do it.

Just because your phone has a voice mail function doesn't mean you have to use it.

Another option is to just let messages pile up without listening.  Soon callers will get a recording “voice mail box full”.  They won’t be able to leave a message, and you won’t be able to receive any message (if that’s what you want).

In other words, just ignore your messages, and if you call someone who has voice mail, just hang up.  Rude, but let the chips fall where they may.

(Back in the day before voice mail and cell phones, I had an answering machine.  I had a really ugly situation develop when a few people told me "I hate talking to an answering machine.  I refuse to deal with them."  My reply:  "Unfortunately my life is not struvtured where I can be sitting at home beside my phone 24 hrs a day.  Since you hate answering machines, stop calling me.  I hate hang up calls."  )

[Yvaine]

If you need to leave a voicemail, then please, for the love of Pete, leave your name and number in a manner so that the person you are calling can actually return the call!

Podity-pod-POD... I get lots of voicemails at work, I don't consider them rude, but MANY can't be returned because the caller wouldn't speak clearly enough to be understood. When I leave a vm it's along the lines of "Hi, this is Calgon. My number is (xxx) xxx-xxxx and I'm calling regarding _______. Please call me back when you have a minute. Again, my name is Calgon & my number is (xxx) xxx-xxxx. Thank you!"

Here was one of my all-time "favorites"--our department was selling tickets to an event and this woman called the office after hours and left this message: "I went online to buy tickets to Event and the site wouldn't let me. *click*"

I might have been able to solve her problem...if she'd left her name, her number, or anything at all...

[WillyNilly]

...In order to set up voice mail on a phone, one has to go thru some steps (password, recording an answering announcement).  Just don’t do it.

Another option is to just let messages pile up without listening.  Soon callers will get a recording “voice mail box full”.  They won’t be able to leave a message, and you won’t be able to receive any message (if that’s what you want)...

These do no not disable VM, FYI.

If you do not set up your VM the robovoice simply answers. Callers can still leave VMs. One does not have to set up a passcode to somehow activate VM, they only set up a password if they want the already there and functioning VM to be password protected.

As for just letting the box fill up - my carrier deletes messages after a while if you don't actively take steps to "save" them, so while occasionally the VM box might fill up, it won't remain full even if I never ever listen to any messages ever.  As far as I know, many carriers do this.

[oceanus]

...In order to set up voice mail on a phone, one has to go thru some steps (password, recording an answering announcement).  Just don’t do it.

Another option is to just let messages pile up without listening.  Soon callers will get a recording “voice mail box full”.  They won’t be able to leave a message, and you won’t be able to receive any message (if that’s what you want)...

These do no not disable VM, FYI.

If you do not set up your VM the robovoice simply answers. Callers can still leave VMs. One does not have to set up a passcode to somehow activate VM, they only set up a password if they want the already there and functioning VM to be password protected.

As for just letting the box fill up - my carrier deletes messages after a while if you don't actively take steps to "save" them, so while occasionally the VM box might fill up, it won't remain full even if I never ever listen to any messages ever.  As far as I know, many carriers do this.

Let the carrier delete the messages.  Let the message box keep filling up, but don't listen to them.  As I said, just because you have a vm function doesn't mean you have to use it.  If someone later asks you why you didn't reply, etc. say "I hate voice mail and I don't use it."

[Bluenomi]

I think many businesses would run into major dramas without voicemail. I leave them all the time at work, I don't always have time to be constantly trying to get hold of someone on the phone, I'd rather leave a message and them call me back when they can. Somethings can't be done via email and I don't always have their email address, just a number.

They aren't rude, sure some people don't like them but that doesn't make it rude to leave one.

[WillyNilly]

...In order to set up voice mail on a phone, one has to go thru some steps (password, recording an answering announcement).  Just don’t do it.

Another option is to just let messages pile up without listening.  Soon callers will get a recording “voice mail box full”.  They won’t be able to leave a message, and you won’t be able to receive any message (if that’s what you want)...

These do no not disable VM, FYI.

If you do not set up your VM the robovoice simply answers. Callers can still leave VMs. One does not have to set up a passcode to somehow activate VM, they only set up a password if they want the already there and functioning VM to be password protected.

As for just letting the box fill up - my carrier deletes messages after a while if you don't actively take steps to "save" them, so while occasionally the VM box might fill up, it won't remain full even if I never ever listen to any messages ever.  As far as I know, many carriers do this.

Let the carrier delete the messages.  Let the message box keep filling up, but don't listen to them.  As I said, just because you have a vm function doesn't mean you have to use it.  If someone later asks you why you didn't reply, etc. say "I hate voice mail and I don't use it."

That's what I do, with the added bit where my outgoing message even informs people to please not leave a message i don't get them, and letting them know how they can reach me.

I was simply responding to your, and other posters, comments about how VM can and should be disabled/disconnected.