Author Topic: Voicemail etiquette  (Read 6516 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

daen

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 502
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #60 on: March 13, 2013, 09:56:12 AM »
I don't have a problem with voicemail in general, although messages where I have to listen five times and still end up guessing at one digit of the phone number turn me snarly.

For leaving messages, though, my standard format is "This is daen calling for Person; my number is 555-1151. I'm checking to see if you're available to do Something on Thursday, March 14, at 3 pm. Again, that's daen at 555-1151." It skips any awkwardness about how I start or end the message (I use the same format for everyone but my husband), and it stays within most attention span limits.

miranova

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1527
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #61 on: March 13, 2013, 10:06:49 AM »
If I hear a VM message that says "don't leave me a voicemail, I don't check them anyway", I would respect that and hang up.  However, I would also be a little irritated that I now had to hang up and try a 2nd method of contacting you, and I would think you were a little high maintenance.  I would never say anything, unless you were my best friend or something, but I would think it.

oceanus

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 693
  • pronounced o-see-ANN-us
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #62 on: March 13, 2013, 10:08:40 AM »
Not sure where you got that from. No, people are absolutely not supposed or required to keep track of personal preferences.

Here:

Not rude exactly but I wonder why people would use vm if they knew the person they wanted to communicate with didn't like/check it.  If they were unaware that would be one thing but if I want somebody to get my message/info/whatever it seems like it would make the most sense to use a form they would pay attention to.

Or, another option is for people who hate voice mail to just not say anything, be angry, grit their teeth, and suffer silently.

Sharnita

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 21246
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #63 on: March 13, 2013, 10:13:00 AM »
I do actually think people do notice who does or doesn't respond to vm or email or whatever. You might not know everyone but you notice if vn never gets results from Sue oor if Ralph never responds to emails. And if you look at the quotation I did diffrtentiate between situations where you were aware and situations where you weren't.

oceanus

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 693
  • pronounced o-see-ANN-us
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #64 on: March 13, 2013, 10:19:49 AM »
Quote
I did diffrtentiate between situations where you were aware and situations where you weren't.

But the situation where you (general) are aware result in finding another way to communicate (maybe a method which you (general) don't like,) or just saying 'forget it' and not communicating with that person.

MariaE

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4304
  • So many books, so little time
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #65 on: March 13, 2013, 10:24:18 AM »
Quote
I did diffrtentiate between situations where you were aware and situations where you weren't.

But the situation where you (general) are aware result in finding another way to communicate (maybe a method which you (general) don't like,) or just saying 'forget it' and not communicating with that person.

Yeah? So?

I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound snarky, I just don't see the problem with that.
 
Dane by birth, Kiwi by choice

Sharnita

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 21246
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #66 on: March 13, 2013, 10:26:58 AM »
Well, yes, that is why the question of how much you want to communicate with them aldo vomes into play.

oceanus

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 693
  • pronounced o-see-ANN-us
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #67 on: March 13, 2013, 10:36:17 AM »
Quote
I did diffrtentiate between situations where you were aware and situations where you weren't.

But the situation where you (general) are aware result in finding another way to communicate (maybe a method which you (general) don't like,) or just saying 'forget it' and not communicating with that person.

Yeah? So?

I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound snarky, I just don't see the problem with that.

For some people ceasing communication (and ending relationships) might not be a problem; for others it is.  If it's not a problem for you, and apparently it isn't, fine.

bah12

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4795
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #68 on: March 13, 2013, 10:47:39 AM »
I am honestly very surprised that anyone would take the stance "I hate VM.  People know/should know this, so it's rude to leave me one."  Yet, the logic doesn't seem to apply the other way around. 
If the reason the general you hate VM so much is because you have to push a few buttons to get to the message, then what does that say about the caller, who had to push a few buttons to call you, listen to your outgoing message, only to be told, "Oh, you thought you just had a few seconds of speaking left with this transacation?  Wrong!  Hang up, open another feature on your phone/computer, and push several more buttons to text/email me your message." 

Frankly, there are very very few personal relationships that I have that I'd be willing to do all that for and absolutely no professional ones.  In a business setting that's detrimental...and for most personal ones as well. 

MariaE

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 4304
  • So many books, so little time
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #69 on: March 13, 2013, 10:48:34 AM »
Quote
I did diffrtentiate between situations where you were aware and situations where you weren't.

But the situation where you (general) are aware result in finding another way to communicate (maybe a method which you (general) don't like,) or just saying 'forget it' and not communicating with that person.

Yeah? So?

I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound snarky, I just don't see the problem with that.

For some people ceasing communication (and ending relationships) might not be a problem; for others it is.  If it's not a problem for you, and apparently it isn't, fine.

What's the alternative though? That's where you've lost me.

If I understand you correctly you're saying there are three options:
1) I use method A of communication which you may or may not like.
2) I use method B, C, D... of communication which I may or may not like.
3) I stop communicating altogether.

What's left to try?
 
Dane by birth, Kiwi by choice

WillyNilly

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 7490
  • Mmmmm, food
    • The World as I Taste It
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #70 on: March 13, 2013, 10:54:18 AM »
???

Regarding personal preferences, letís say there is a group of 4 people who communicate fairly regularly.  But they each have their own personal preferences and theyíve decided to let others know how they want to communicate.

Person 1:  I hate voicemail,  I donít want to listen to tedious, unnecessary messages and I hate the process I have to go theu to retrieve messages which are usually a waste of my time anyway.

Person 2:  I hate email.  Leave me a voice mail because I donít do email.  I also hate talking on the phone.

Person 3:  I prefer texting.  I hate voice mail and email.  Send me a text message if you want to tell/ask me something.  Iíll also reply via text so you better check your text messages regularly.

Person 4: I hate texting, voice mail, and email.  I want to talk to a live person on the telephone, but Iím not available between 5 Ė 7 weeknights and my Saturdays are so busy.

SoÖÖÖ. (in addition to living a life) everyone is supposed to keep track of all these personal preferences OR they can just say forget it and start scratching names off the list of people they communicate with?  REALLY?

???   ::)

Unless these are co-workers who have to put up with each other's methods of communication, I honestly don't see how these are  "a group of 4 people who communicate fairly regularly". And if they are co-workers, well at work, you suck it up and you communicate as your employer instructs you to, even if its a method you hate.

My best friend and I are so close because we communicate similarly. My DH and I worked as a couple because we communicate similarly. The family members I have who communicate similarly to me are the ones I'm closest to these days, even if 15-20 years ago things might have been different.

I have friends and family who are phone people, and i don't shun them or hate them or anything. But the reality is I am not. I don't use VM and I don't initial calls (or leave VMs) unless I have no other choice. So I end up not being as close to the phone folks. And its not just because of me, on my end. They all have computers and as far as I know they all have texting. They are also choosing to not text, use email, or use Facebook messenger, just as much as I'm choosing to not use phoning & VM. And the reality is the relationships begin to fade a bit or they never really form well to begin with.

And the reality is I do use plenty of forms of communication regularly. I check my email multiple times a day, from my computer or from my cell, I also check my Facebook at least once if not 4 times a day, from my computer or via my cell - and I can check from any internet connected computer really. I check my cell daily, usually a few times. And I will answer my phone if i hear it ringing and I'm available to speak. So its not like its hard to get a hold of me, to get me a message or to get an answer from me, or have a chat with me despite me not using VM. So if someone insisted on using VM, despite my outgoing message asking to please not leave one, and despite the fact that it usually takes me days to listen to the VM if I do at all (I would probably just call back "I saw I missed your call, whats up?"), then yeah, messages will get lost and the friendship won't thrive. In some ways its sad, but in others it just practical.

oceanus

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 693
  • pronounced o-see-ANN-us
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #71 on: March 13, 2013, 10:55:21 AM »
I am honestly very surprised that anyone would take the stance "I hate VM.  People know/should know this, so it's rude to leave me one."  Yet, the logic doesn't seem to apply the other way around. 
If the reason the general you hate VM so much is because you have to push a few buttons to get to the message, then what does that say about the caller, who had to push a few buttons to call you, listen to your outgoing message, only to be told, "Oh, you thought you just had a few seconds of speaking left with this transacation?  Wrong!  Hang up, open another feature on your phone/computer, and push several more buttons to text/email me your message." 

Frankly, there are very very few personal relationships that I have that I'd be willing to do all that for and absolutely no professional ones.  In a business setting that's detrimental...and for most personal ones as well.

Very well stated.  :)

Quote
I honestly don't see how these are  "a group of 4 people who communicate fairly regularly"

Really?  Lots of people have 4 (even more) relatives and/or friends with whom they communicate fairly regularly.

« Last Edit: March 13, 2013, 10:58:30 AM by oceanus »

daen

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 502
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #72 on: March 13, 2013, 11:00:28 AM »
I've resigned myself to the fact that certain people that I must communicate with (at work, for example) are inconsistent about listening to VM, and will call me back and say "I think I missed your call." So I leave a concise VM, containing all the necessary info (in case they do listen), but no more (so I don't waste a lot of time if they don't).

I do find it a little  ::) when they call me back while I'm leaving the VM, though.

WillyNilly

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 7490
  • Mmmmm, food
    • The World as I Taste It
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #73 on: March 13, 2013, 11:06:12 AM »
I am honestly very surprised that anyone would take the stance "I hate VM.  People know/should know this, so it's rude to leave me one."  Yet, the logic doesn't seem to apply the other way around. 
If the reason the general you hate VM so much is because you have to push a few buttons to get to the message, then what does that say about the caller, who had to push a few buttons to call you, listen to your outgoing message, only to be told, "Oh, you thought you just had a few seconds of speaking left with this transacation?  Wrong!  Hang up, open another feature on your phone/computer, and push several more buttons to text/email me your message." 

Frankly, there are very very few personal relationships that I have that I'd be willing to do all that for and absolutely no professional ones.  In a business setting that's detrimental...and for most personal ones as well.

For me though its more then just I hate VM because I have to push a few buttons. Its that I find it pointlessly time consuming, and I dislike the whole disembodied voice speaking at me without any back and forth, I find it uncomfortable. A conversation is me speaking with someone, watching TV is a voice speaking but not at me.  A VM is something I have to just sit and listen to without me being able to participate, and its different then a totally impersonal TV voice speaking on a screen. (For the record, talk radio makes me twitchy too, although its much easier to avoid it then VM.)

Quote
I honestly don't see how these are  "a group of 4 people who communicate fairly regularly"

Really?  Lots of people have 4 (even more) relatives and/or friends with whom they communicate fairly regularly.

I have many more then 4 people I communicate with regularly. But not many who are all so radically different in how they communicate. That's was my point - the people I communicate with regularly are the people whom prefer to communicate in ways similar to my preferences. The folks in my life who hate the forms of communication I prefer are not the people I communicate with most frequently, because we don't communicate for fun since each others methods are unfun to each other.

oceanus

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 693
  • pronounced o-see-ANN-us
Re: Voicemail etiquette
« Reply #74 on: March 13, 2013, 11:09:21 AM »
Quote
That's was my point - the people I communicate with regularly are the people whom prefer to communicate in ways similar to my preferences.

Good.  So what's the problem?