General Etiquette > Family and Children

Third (but also first) baby shower

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peaches:

--- Quote from: LadyR on April 03, 2013, 08:38:09 PM ---
--- Quote from: kareng57 on April 03, 2013, 06:09:03 PM ---
--- Quote from: missmarie on April 02, 2013, 12:49:47 AM ---Ok, I've been on vacation and haven't had a chance to read through the whole thread but here's an update for anyone interested: It apparently isn't entirely family only, a few friends are now included on the Facebook invite list. They are registered and only two items are under $40 and one of these is baby wipes.  I was informed by my mother that I should buy the stroller they want (at $250). I feel at this point that I can't not attend in the interest of family peace but I will probably not be purchasing the stroller.  My brother is not attending. He will be there at the beginning and end but it is being planned as a female-oriented event. Also, I apologize for my hyperbole in using the word 'atrocity'. That really seems tomhave bothered a few people and I didn't intend to do that.

--- End quote ---


There's never been any rule that guests at a baby or bridal shower must buy only gifts listed on the registry.  There are plenty of universally-needed baby items in the $ 20 or so range - onesies, receiving blankets, baby washcloths, etc.

IME a $ 250 stroller is a very expensive item to have on a registry - perhaps grandparents might spend that much, but not other relatives.

--- End quote ---

Different circles. Most of my shower gifts were in the $100-$200 range and my bff actually did buy the travel system and will be buying one for her sister. It is the norm in our circle (wedding gifts are often around $200+ and bridal shower gifts in the $100 range), which is why it is only close friends/family and why I personally don't like showers for second babies (but I still say this couple gets a pass as this is his first child and the first shower his family has gotten to throw and I'm not sure the HC are at fault and not the overly excited grandmother.)

--- End quote ---

The good news is that no one has to buy off of a registry. People of limited means can choose something unique, but inexpensive. Or they might make a personal gift, such as a baby quilt or cute bibs or something like that.

I often give children's books as a baby shower gift. In our circle of friends and family, many shower gifts are in the $25-$50 range. Larger gifts often are given by grandparents or siblings, or people might pool their resources for a $100 or so gift.

In etiquette, there isn't any minimum amount for a shower gift.

kareng57:

--- Quote from: LadyR on April 03, 2013, 08:38:09 PM ---
--- Quote from: kareng57 on April 03, 2013, 06:09:03 PM ---
--- Quote from: missmarie on April 02, 2013, 12:49:47 AM ---Ok, I've been on vacation and haven't had a chance to read through the whole thread but here's an update for anyone interested: It apparently isn't entirely family only, a few friends are now included on the Facebook invite list. They are registered and only two items are under $40 and one of these is baby wipes.  I was informed by my mother that I should buy the stroller they want (at $250). I feel at this point that I can't not attend in the interest of family peace but I will probably not be purchasing the stroller.  My brother is not attending. He will be there at the beginning and end but it is being planned as a female-oriented event. Also, I apologize for my hyperbole in using the word 'atrocity'. That really seems tomhave bothered a few people and I didn't intend to do that.

--- End quote ---


There's never been any rule that guests at a baby or bridal shower must buy only gifts listed on the registry.  There are plenty of universally-needed baby items in the $ 20 or so range - onesies, receiving blankets, baby washcloths, etc.

IME a $ 250 stroller is a very expensive item to have on a registry - perhaps grandparents might spend that much, but not other relatives.

--- End quote ---

Different circles. Most of my shower gifts were in the $100-$200 range and my bff actually did buy the travel system and will be buying one for her sister. It is the norm in our circle (wedding gifts are often around $200+ and bridal shower gifts in the $100 range), which is why it is only close friends/family and why I personally don't like showers for second babies (but I still say this couple gets a pass as this is his first child and the first shower his family has gotten to throw and I'm not sure the HC are at fault and not the overly excited grandmother.)

--- End quote ---


Okay, what can I say.  Obviously these are the norm in some circles, but I certainly don't travel in them......I simply could not afford to attend a shower where I was expected to spend that much.

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