General Etiquette > All In A Day's Work

I Cannot Violate Federal Law Because Your Wife is "Special"

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BeagleMommy:
I had a call last week from the husband of a former student.  Two years ago, she had been academically dismissed from our program because she was asked to leave two internships and, therefore, failed.  She tried to claim she needed special arrangements but had no official diagnosis or education plan that is required.  She fought the dismissal all the way to the vice president of the university, but it was upheld.  Her husband wants her to be readmitted (to pick up where she left off) because he doesn't feel she was treated fairly and she "doesn't deal with conflict at all".

I explained that I could not tell him anything about his wife's academics because of federal law, but I would pull her file and have my director look at it.  Director said she could reapply but that was her only option.  When I spoke with the husband and explained this he said "That is not an option.  I'm paying a student loan and have not had any benefit.  You need to tell me what she can do to pick up where she left off."

Again and again I explained I was, legally, unable to give him any information even though she was his wife.  She had to contact the director or reapply.  He kept repeating that she "doesn't deal with conflict at all".

Director said he will email the student.  Ugh!  He just couldn't seem to understand that no matter how often or how vehemently he asked I was unable to do what he wanted.  I have a feeling this is going to get messy.  I think I did okay, though.

LeveeWoman:

--- Quote from: BeagleMommy on March 19, 2013, 02:42:51 PM ---I had a call last week from the husband of a former student.  Two years ago, she had been academically dismissed from our program because she was asked to leave two internships and, therefore, failed.  She tried to claim she needed special arrangements but had no official diagnosis or education plan that is required.  She fought the dismissal all the way to the vice president of the university, but it was upheld.  Her husband wants her to be readmitted (to pick up where she left off) because he doesn't feel she was treated fairly and she "doesn't deal with conflict at all".

I explained that I could not tell him anything about his wife's academics because of federal law, but I would pull her file and have my director look at it.  Director said she could reapply but that was her only option.  When I spoke with the husband and explained this he said "That is not an option.  I'm paying a student loan and have not had any benefit.  You need to tell me what she can do to pick up where she left off."

Again and again I explained I was, legally, unable to give him any information even though she was his wife.  She had to contact the director or reapply.  He kept repeating that she "doesn't deal with conflict at all".

Director said he will email the student.  Ugh!  He just couldn't seem to understand that no matter how often or how vehemently he asked I was unable to do what he wanted.  I have a feeling this is going to get messy.  I think I did okay, though.

--- End quote ---

It sounds as if you dealt with him effectively. I'd say the same things to  him again if he calls back.

Sharnita:
You handled it perfectly, although I'd be yempted to tell him you don't deal woth conflict either and he will need to wait until your father can call him back.

weeblewobble:
That's like the woman who attended pre-registration for kindergarten for her son the other night and tried to explain to the teacher (in front of the rest of the parents) that the teacher would have to let her son walk away from his desk and play at the fun centers whenever he felt like it, because he "didn't like to do worksheets unless he feels like doing them." They'd had major problems at the son's preschool with this issue.  So basically, the teacher has to wait until he is in the mood to do his classwork, but otherwise, has to let him break the class rules and do whatever he wants.  (While the other students follow the rules.)  The mom made it clear her son didn't have special needs, but they just raised him to "follow his instincts" when it comes to work.

DH and I walked out of the meeting and said, "Well, at least we know we won't be the problem parents next year."



 

weeblewobble:

--- Quote from: Sharnita on March 19, 2013, 03:14:04 PM ---You handled it perfectly, although I'd be yempted to tell him you don't deal woth conflict either and he will need to wait until your father can call him back.

--- End quote ---

Sharnita.  I love you.  I just want to make that clear.

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