Author Topic: Holiday Cottage Moochers  (Read 25609 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

siamesecat2965

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 8877
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #90 on: March 28, 2013, 11:54:05 AM »
I've been following this thread for a bit, and I think you have made the right call for now Rusty. Its unfortunate that some bad apples have spoiled it for others.
If in the future you feel like sharing thatís 100% up to you. But make sure you lend on your terms.

I think so too. You letting them use your cottage is a privilege, not an entitlement, and if there are some who can't abide by the rules, then everyone suffers. And that's the way it is. It's yours to do with as you wish, whether it be to lend it out, or not.

FoxPaws

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 5407
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #91 on: March 28, 2013, 06:51:39 PM »
I suspect that the people you really want to have use of your vacation home - i.e. the ones who appreciate what a generous offer it is and clean up after themselves - will understand completely when you have to shut it down for awhile.
I am so a lady. And if you say I'm not, I'll slug you. - Cindy Brady

kudeebee

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2225
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #92 on: March 28, 2013, 10:42:05 PM »
Thanks for all the good advice.   

DH and I have decided that, as we seriously underestimated the amount of angst loaning out our cottage had the potential to cause, that we have probably created a monster.   DH has decided (I was more reluctant) to restrict loanouts to our immediate family for the time being, to create a breathing space while we re-think the whole process.   I'm sure we'll be able to come up with a more suitable arrangement, ie., maybe a management company.

I think a lot of people are right to say that perhaps there is an amount of jealousy attached to our good fortune, and that certain people feel entitled to abuse our offer of a free holiday because of this. 

As to the BIL and niece concerned (same family), DH is going to speak to the family and tell them point blank that we were not at all impressed with their behaviour.  Knowing the BIL though it will just be brushed off as a "storm in a teacup".  Going to be interesting next time they ask to use the cottage (not happening).

Not everyone has left the cottage in poor condition and thats why I was reluctant to act, but DH thinks a total ban at present is the answer, then later on we can loan out only to trusted family & friends.

As per the bolded--that really doesn't come as a surprise, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.  I hope DH is going to ask for money for the repairs from niece.  I would not let her get by with this and they would definitely be on the "not going to use for a long, long time" list.

I also think your dh has made a good decision.  It will get easier every time that you say "no" plus you now have the peace of  mind of knowing that whenever you go to your cottage, it will be in good condition and everything that you need will be there.  You can also go whenever YOU want, even on a moment's notice, and that is the way that it should be, after all it is your cottage!

HGolightly

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 170
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #93 on: March 29, 2013, 02:11:43 PM »
Our family has had a cottage for many years and from the get go, my parents have graciously invited family and friends to stay as their guests when my parents are there. Very few  people have been loaned the cottage that would not leave it as they found it. Many extended relatives have felt the were entitled to borrow it but my mom always reminds them it is a privilege and the names on the title are the only ones entitled to it. There is a checklist that even my brother and I adhere to. Yes my mom is a neat freak but they have put in too many years of hard work, sweat and money to not reap the rewards or have it destroyed by the nuts on the family tree.

mmswm

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2362
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #94 on: March 29, 2013, 06:57:03 PM »
Is it really bad of me for wanting to get some popcorn and soda the day the OP comes back to tell us how this discussion went over with BIL and niece?  Well, if she tells us, that is. :)
Some people lift weights.  I lift measures.  It's a far more esoteric workout. - (Quoted from a personal friend)

Erich L-ster

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 667
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #95 on: March 29, 2013, 07:22:09 PM »
I would allow family who cleaned up after themselves, stocked or replaced food & toiletries they used to continue to use the place when it's available. Family members who abuse the place would be cut off.

rain

  • Member
  • **
  • Posts: 763
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #96 on: March 29, 2013, 07:29:04 PM »
Is it really bad of me for wanting to get some popcorn and soda the day the OP comes back to tell us how this discussion went over with BIL and niece?  Well, if she tells us, that is. :)


well - that makes two of us
"oh we thank thee lord for the things we need, like the wind and the rain and the apple seed"

Otterpop

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1266
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #97 on: March 29, 2013, 11:45:34 PM »
Is it really bad of me for wanting to get some popcorn and soda the day the OP comes back to tell us how this discussion went over with BIL and niece?  Well, if she tells us, that is. :)


well - that makes two of us

three  ;D

VorFemme

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 13155
  • Strolls with scissors! Too tired to run today!
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #98 on: March 30, 2013, 08:02:56 PM »
Extra butter on the popcorn, please......virtual popcorn tastes so good that way!

Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I say more?

sparksals

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 17385
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #99 on: March 31, 2013, 12:28:14 AM »
Extra butter on the popcorn, please......virtual popcorn tastes so good that way!


DAng.. wrong website.. I was looking for the like button!

Jocelyn

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 3222
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #100 on: March 31, 2013, 06:58:24 PM »
Thanks for all the good advice.   

DH and I have decided that, as we seriously underestimated the amount of angst loaning out our cottage had the potential to cause, that we have probably created a monster.   

If you do decide to let others use it, I'd call the fee a 'maintenance' fee. Emphasize it's not just a cleaning crew, but someone who will make sure the house is properly weatherized so there will be no damage until the new visitors arrive. Personally, I'd feel terrible if I didn't do the weatherizing properly as a guest and $100 would be cheap at twice the price to have someone else do the mopping and scrubbing, plus the weatherizing, and know that my friends wouldn't be asking me to reimburse them for home damages due to my ineptness at winterizing.

VorFemme

  • Super Hero!
  • ****
  • Posts: 13155
  • Strolls with scissors! Too tired to run today!
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #101 on: March 31, 2013, 07:17:11 PM »
I second the winterizing fee - my family used to use Grandma's house as a "guest house" after she went into a nursing home....until an early winter freeze (unusual that far south in Texas) the week after Thanksgiving froze the toilet when no one had thought to "winterize" it....and no one realized it until closer to Christmas.....house was NOT in good shape......
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I say more?

mstigerlily

  • Jr. Member
  • *
  • Posts: 65
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #102 on: March 31, 2013, 08:06:11 PM »
what if it was like a deposit, and the people who leave the place looking as good or better than it was when they arrived get it back, and those who don't, don't?

Okay, as I type that it seems like a lot of added work for you...

johelenc1

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 1858
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #103 on: April 01, 2013, 12:36:48 AM »
It seems agreed that charging a modest fee is the simplest and most fair thing to do.  I don't think it matters if someone has left the house in perfect shape before.  You simply declare a new rule. From this point on the fee is $X.  For everyone, no matter what. 

For the record, even if I had left the place in perfect condition prior to this, I would have absolutely no problem paying a small fee to use your cabin.  Because I am a reasonable person, I would recognize that getting to stay there at all is a privilege and I would just be grateful I'm getting the chance.  Anyone who would argue otherwise is basically just a jerk.


doodlemor

  • Hero Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 2258
Re: Holiday Cottage Moochers
« Reply #104 on: May 23, 2013, 11:47:13 PM »
Thanks for all the good advice.   

DH and I have decided that, as we seriously underestimated the amount of angst loaning out our cottage had the potential to cause, that we have probably created a monster.   DH has decided (I was more reluctant) to restrict loanouts to our immediate family for the time being, to create a breathing space while we re-think the whole process.   I'm sure we'll be able to come up with a more suitable arrangement, ie., maybe a management company.

I think a lot of people are right to say that perhaps there is an amount of jealousy attached to our good fortune, and that certain people feel entitled to abuse our offer of a free holiday because of this. 

As to the BIL and niece concerned (same family), DH is going to speak to the family and tell them point blank that we were not at all impressed with their behaviour.  Knowing the BIL though it will just be brushed off as a "storm in a teacup".  Going to be interesting next time they ask to use the cottage (not happening).

Not everyone has left the cottage in poor condition and thats why I was reluctant to act, but DH thinks a total ban at present is the answer, then later on we can loan out only to trusted family & friends.

Just reviving this thread to ask for another update, especially now that the official summer season will be starting with Memorial Day. 

How has your new policy been working out?