General Etiquette > All In A Day's Work

How to let someone off the hook

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This has me scratching my head.

I had a photo shoot scheduled today with 5 volunteer models that were people I knew. I knew I really only needed 4, but put in the extra because it's volunteer because I "knew" one would drop out (I just had no idea which one). So one called before hand and asked if she could leave early, I said, show up and we'll get what we can from you until you have to leave. She was a no show, now call.

It was perfect, we had the right amount of people, one more would have been bad.

I may want to use her for other projects. Do I send her a message? Do I let her know she wasn't needed and I was covering my base. Do I wait for her to say something to me?

I don't want to stop communication and have her ignore me because she didn't show. I'm just at a loss as I know she's probably feeling guilty and I'm perfectly happy.

Not showing is very wrong when a person has given their word.  I don't think that you should contact her about this, and don't let her know that she wasn't needed.

If you think that you might actually need her again, I think that you should wait for her to call you, and see what kind of an excuse she has.  She blew you off this time - if I were you I'd be wary of using her again.

Even though it did work out, I think you'd be justified in being annoyed she was a no show, no call. That's pretty terrible behavior.

But if you do want to let her off the hook, you might call her and say "hey I just wanted to make sure you were ok. I got a little worried when you didn't show up and I didn't hear form you.  You are fine?  Ok great. Well I'll let you know next time I need you... just gimme a call next time if you can't make it, okay?" if you come at from a caring angle she's less likely to be defensive or fearful, etc.

I'd be wary about using someone who couldn't be bothered to show or call off in future. Yes, you weren't inconvenienced this time, but she didn't know that and left you hanging. 

Perfect Circle:
I would never use someone who didn't bother showing up or notifying me they weren't going to. Even when volunteering some professionalism is required from both sides and a person like this is showing none.


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